Husband refuses to financially support wife's family after they ridiculed his business idea, believes they don't deserve a ‘dime’ of his major profit: ‘They were very unsupportive’

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  • "[They] get mad when I never pay for the meals, the outing, the vacation, etc..." NOTE THE EDSTATES AMERICA 367349 F OLLAR
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  • "AITA for no longer giving support to my wife's family after I became successful with my own company after they talked down about me."

    My (early-30's) wife (mid- 20's) grew up in a fairly poor enviroment. Her grandpa had money, but her mom didn't and her sister doesn't. My wife has an incredibly strong work
  • ethic (she's probably moreso defined as a workaholic). When I first met her, I was in trucking, making about 50k- 70k/year. Since then I developed a niche for a
  • speciality marketing field and became very good at it. All my friends encouraged me to go into business for myself with a marketing company. My wife was fully supportive of this, even after we
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  • discussed the financial difficulties we would have for the first year or so due to al limited budget. I made sure she knew that some months, I may not get a check from the business (my salary is paid monthly).
  • Her family, however, were not. They accused me of neglecting my family, being lazy, not wanting to work, etc. They would constantly be bringing up the fact that I "didn't have
  • a job" because I was always home (working remote). She would defend me, but they would ignore it and continue to call me lazy and a "d adbeat" for putting my
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  • daughter in daycare while I worked from home. I was still driving a truck part- time to have steady, reliable income but it was only half of what I was making on a good week.
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  • In the last year however, I have grown my income from my business beyond what I was making in trucking, and have very little overhead. Since we
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  • cut costs back when I first started, we realized a lot of things we were paying for, we could do without or found other alternatives and we never really added those expenses back so
  • it's like we have significantly more money now. I still drive a semi occasionally for a friend who owns his truck (mainly to keep my CDL active and stay knowledgable in the industry as a fallback).
  • Her family has taken note, and they are constantly asking to go out to eat with us, hang out with us, etc then get mad when I never pay for the meals, the outing, the vacation, etc (aside from my part of the tab, obviously).
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  • Looking back, I understand why they never had money, they were living well beyond their means, but if it makes them happy then it is what it is.
  • I let my wife do whatever she wants with her money (which sometimes includes buying stuff for her family, which I support her doing with her money if that's how she wants to
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  • spend it) but I make sure that she knows I don't want a dime of my money going to her family since they were very unsupportive of what
  • made us our money and would go as far as to talk down about me for doing what lead to our money.
  • CodBeneficial4909 I'm curious as to what your wife says when you say you don't want a dime going to her family. That will tell you everything you need to know. Also - you are NTA
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  • otsukaren_613 You are are not obligated to play nice just because they want your money. I would, however, play nice if I wanted my partner to be happy. You can be polite without giving them anything. ESPECIALLY if they haven't apologized. I'm going with NTA.
  • UXEGbm7tMy My wife is definitely happy. She is content with our arrangement and has never complained about it, but recently her family has been putting pressure on her to make me "loosen up" and be part of the family more.
  • NhianaBoo NTA. You're not obligated to bankroll people who disrespected you while you were working hard to build something.
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  • gringledoom NTA. Even without the backstory of them treating you badly, it's incredibly Not Cool for them to invite you to things to try to con you into paying for them!
  • DomHaynie NTA. Even if you aren't al petty person, you're not required to pay for sh that's not yours or your family's. Congrats on your success and for always being prepared/having a fall back.

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