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AITA for secretly planning a surprise birthday party for my son because my wife always makes his feel like an afterthought?
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It's okay for her to feel more of a connection with her daughters, but barely putting any effort at all into her son is really sad. It also just seems like she doesn't want anyone to put effort into Caleb. Her being weirdly possessive over planning birthdays just sounds like a way for her to make sure that he never gets a nice one.
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Yeah, this dad needs to start standing up to his wife about Caleb; he can't be supportive from the behind the scenes forever.
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Mom treats 10-year-old son's birthdays like an afterthought compared to teenage daughters' elaborate parties, dad secretly plans a surprise party for him to counter her blatant favoritism: ‘I want him to feel as precious as his sisters’
Parents typically strive to parent each of their kids equally, but the truth is, life has a funny way of creating unintentional favorites… or at least making it look like there's a favorite. I noticed years ago that my niece seemed to get mountains of toys for her birthday and holidays while her brother usually got books and educational items. Maybe from the outside, it could really look like favoritism at play. But they simply had really different interests, expectations, and needs. One doesn't necessarily have to spend the same amount of money or buy the same kinds of gifts for everyone to be a fair parent; it's about making each child feel uniquely and intentionally celebrated.
One dad has noticed that, over the years, his wife hasn't been treating their son, Caleb, with the same level of attention as their daughters. The place where this is the most obvious so far has been on their birthdays. His wife has always taken great care to throw the girls elaborate and expensive birthday parties, while 10-year-old Caleb has had to deal with far simpler celebrations: supermarket cake, pizza, and hastily-hung decorations. Determined to make sure that his son finally feels seen and cherished, he secretly plans a crazy surprise party for Caleb. However, he has a well-founded fear that his wife might object.