31-year-old boyfriend demands to see 25-year-old girlfriend's schedule so he knows why she doesn't text him back during the work day after she gets promoted at work: 'He questions everything'

Author image for Baiz Hoen
Baiz Hoen
Feb 17, 2025 7:00 AM EST

One of the most beautiful parts about being seriously intimate with someone is that you feel comfortable enough to share things about yourself that you would never tell anyone else. Whether this be stories about your life you've never told before or activities you want to try in the bedroom that might feel embarrassing otherwise, you know your person loves you unconditionally and won't make you feel judged. Sharing these things with our partners strengthens our relationships like no other, and it's important to make your partner feel safe enough to open up.

That being said, being in a relationship doesn't mean you have to share every part of yourself with your partner. Some parts of ourselves are good to keep to ourselves. It helps us to maintain our personhood while still being the partner we want to be. One woman had an issue with this when she got promoted and her husband asked her to share her schedule with him. Do you think this is a real invasion of privacy? Or is this just something you should be used to if you're going to be intimate with someone? Keep reading to see if you agree with this woman's plan of action.

Advertisement
  • 01
    • B T 3 P A D F 9 J KL : Z X C V B N A M >>> x option command > command option
    via Chris Montgomery
  • 02

    "AITAH for telling my bf to stop questioning my job?"

    My boyfriend (31M) and I (25F) get along great, but occasionally topics related to my job ruin our relationship and I don't understand why.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 03
    Context related to the job: I work in the corporation and my bf works in the police. I work 9-5, and he works shifts. I commute daily for 1 hour, he's 1 minute away. He earns twice as much as me.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 04
    6 months ago I have been promoted as a Lean Responsible, and although I try to explain to him what it means and what I do, he seems to have the impression that my work is not important or demading. My salary has doubled
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 05
    demading. My salary has doubled since then and although I am still studying and it is challenging, I love my job and I am so grateful for the oportunity! My contract allows me 8-10 days of home office per month. I work HO on all
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 06
    office per month. I work on all fridays, and maybe twice a month an additional day per week = around 6 days/month. But my boss told me that he expects me to take home office when I don't have work in the plant, or meetings. In the home office I
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 07
    meetings. In the home office I should take care of the analysis part of the job and the rest I should focus to solve the problems and implement improvement projects on the shopfloor -> which makes sense for me too!! It is a busy year and our company has a plant extension coming up so we are full of work and events!
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 08
    The problems started soon after the promo. My boyfriend has always been the type to text me at work, not non-stop, but from time to time throughout the day, and I always answered him but depending on how I could. He gets upset if I don't call him when I have time off, or if I don't answer his texts, or if I am "dry". And to avoid that, I decided that every day I would send him the schedule of the day so that he would know when I had meetings and I couldn't text him.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 09
    But he became obsessive about that calendar, and he asks all kinds of questions related to the meetings: "Why are you involved in something like this?", "Is this your work field even?", "Who else participates?" and etc. I feel like he interrogates me about these things because he doesn't believe me? Or because he thinks it's something suspicious? because he
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 10
    something suspicious? because he doesn't behave normally and is very uncomfortable and insistent when he asks, and always critical (not encouraging). Obviously, after all those meeting I gain a lot of tasks to do with due dates, I have multiple projects running, and so my workload doesnt end when my meetings do. But if i dont start to
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 11
    meetings do. But if i dont start to actively text him in "free" periods in my calendar, or call him, he gets mad "Havent you finished the meeting yet?", "Why arent you calling me if youre free?". He is just soooo neeeedyyyy its exhausting!
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 12
    My bf doesn't seem to understand the politic, he expects me to stay each time he is on his free shift. And when I can, ofc I do! But sometimes I have so much to do at the plant and cant! When I tell him I have meetings, or tasks, or audits he starts asking me all kind of questions "Can't you do that tomorrow?", "Is this urgent", "I thought that meeting is on Teams in your calendar" and so on. Also, he doesn't understand corporate.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 13
    Some meetings are f2f but we keep a online meet link for the ones that work . My boss doesn't allow me to stay if I have a important meeting!! And if I say for example I have to go to work tomorrow cause of a meet, he looks at the calendar, sees the link, and calls me a liar because that meeting is actually on Teams and I should be able to participate form home also... he questions
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 14
    form home also... he questions everything, and if i start to explain to him, he gets even more invasive with questions to the point where i just apologize and say i am wrong.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 15
    I just really don't understand why he is like that. He tells me I don't care about us seeing each other more, (we fking live together and see each other EVERY.SINGLE.DAY) or that I am ignorant, or that I am a workaholic, or that I try to fool him with my BS.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 16
    Eventually I told him to stop. questiog anything regarding my job because he can't seem to get anything I am saying and eventually ends up accusing me of some sh. I even thought about asking my job contract ot be changed to either no HO days or 6-8 HO days so this will be just sth he has to deal with (I always thought HO is a exception, not mandatory). AITAH for telling him to fuckoff and care about his job, not mine?
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 17
    HOW CAN I ADRESS THIS OR BETTER MY SITUATION? How can i talk about this to him and set some healthy boundaries?
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 18

    People in the comments told this woman to get rid of this guy.

    Cheezburger Image 10465032960
    via Gaining Visuals
  • 19
    NTA. Giirrrrrlfriend, you need to drop that foo
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 20
    NTA You gave him the privileges to controle you and now he's showing his controlling and possibly ab ive tendencies. he's a jealous AH. Tell him he lost his privilege of access to your calendar. You will not call or text back within your scheduled working hour and if you have overtime you text him. like any normal couple
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 21
    It is very difficult for people who are not in the corporate world to understand the corporate world. And it is very difficult for those in the corporate world to appropriately explain because, let's be honest, a lot of it is pure BS.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 22

    God forbid a woman have hobbies... or a job.

    That said, your bf also seems to have an issue accepting a woman may have a professional career that makes demands on her, plus jealous, or that is the impression I get.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 23
    I am going to say YTA for telling your bf to just stop questioning your job, not because you are not right, but because this whole situation is going to be very important in your relationship. So you either talk it out and find a way you can navigate your different work scenes as a couple, or you are going to have problems moving forward.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 24

    Meeting your husband at work doesn't sound so ideal either.

    Girl! Do NOT let this bloodsucker RUIN your career! He is insecure AF, knows he doesn't deserve you, and is scared to death you will meet your husband at work! Time to get ready to DIP!
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 25
    I see you keep asking in the comments "how should I manage this?" But I'm guessing no one is going to have a real response for you because most of us don't need systems.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 26
    If we text or call our SOS while they are at work and they don't respond we just...wait until they respond. Like my husband doesn't need my meeting schedule, he calls/texts me whenever he wants to and I respond when I can. No system needed. If either of us have an usually busy day there is typically a heads up given, or a "hey, I'm in a work thing so I will probably be out of pocket all day." But that's it.
    via ThrowRAxbx
  • 27

    Truth!

    He doesn't need to know your schedule, he needs to grow up.
    via ThrowRAxbx

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

boyfriend promotion work from home aita work reddit story relationships workplace reddit thread Reddit toxic relationship
Scroll Down For The Next Article