Woman demands marriage counseling after husband refuses to stop coworker from acting like his ‘work wife', he goes and tells coworker about it instead: ‘She's trying to destroy my marriage’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Feb 15, 2025 10:00 PM EST

This may sound harsh, but no self-respecting woman should throw herself at someone else's husband. Especially when that husband is someone you work with. We're better than this, and we deserve better than this. It is simply not worth it.

Whenever we hear the phrase 'work wife', we know that the story that follows will make us want to repeat what is said above over and over again. To find that woman who considers herself to be a married coworker's 'work wife', and shake her until she understands just how desperate and silly she sounds. 

If you are unfamiliar with the phrase, let us explain. Some colleagues, usually a man and a woman, find it funny to refer to each other as 'work wife' or 'work husband', to describe the close relationship they have at work. This is all seemingly innocent until you find out that one of them (and it is usually only one of them), is already married, to a real spouse, who is waiting for them back at home.

From then on, it's not difficult to realize that this phrase is used not at all innocently, and the relationship that was formed between these colleagues is simply a recipe for marital disaster.

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  • That is what happened in the story down below, which was written by a wife who goes into excruciatingly painful details about the relationship of her husband with his ‘work wife’.

    Now, she is unsure if she could ever fix her marriage because of this ‘work wife’, and honestly–we are unsure as well.

    Keep scrolling to read the full story, and let us know what you think in the comments down below.

  • "The real problem is that Mark thinks she's just being funny""
    via RossHelen

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "My husband doesn't see how his 'work wife' is trying to destroy our marriage"

    I (31F) am at my wit's end. with my husband's (32M) coworker Sarah (30F), and his complete inability to see what's happening. I'm not usually one for reddit, but I need to know if I'm going crazy here.
    via Honeybellmama
  • Where do I even start? Three years ago, my husband Mark started working with Sarah. At first, I tried to be welcoming. I invited her to our BBQs, included her in
    via Honeybellmama
  • group outings, and genuinely tried to be friendly. Big mistake. She spent the entire time making backhanded comments about everything from my career ("Oh, you're just a
    via Honeybellmama
  • yoga instructor? How... peaceful.") to my cooking ("I guess not everyone can master basic seasoning."). The real problem is that Mark thinks she's "just being
    via Honeybellmama
  • funny." Last month, she literally threw away the anniversary mug I gave him because it "clashed with the office aesthetic." When I got upset, Mark said I was being too sensitive and that "Sarah
    via Honeybellmama
  • just has high standards for office decor." IT WAS A MUG WITH OUR WEDDING PHOTO ON IT. Some greatest hits from Sarah:
    via Honeybellmama
  • Some greatest hits from Sarah: • She scheduled a "mandatory" work dinner on our anniversary
    via Honeybellmama
  • • She convinced Mark not to take a promotion because it would mean working with a different team • She posts daily photos of them together with hashtags like #WorkPowerCouple and #WorkSpouse
    via Honeybellmama
  • • She tells everyone at their office that she "takes better care of him than I do" • She changed his coffee order and now tells everyone she "trained him right"
    via Honeybellmama
  • The worst part? My husband is completely blind to all of this. Yesterday, he actually told me about how Sarah said our new house (which we spent months searching for) was "charming, in a
    via Honeybellmama
  • starter home kind of way." He repeated this while LAUGHING. I tried talking to him about it, but Sarah has convinced him I'm "just insecure." She's managed to insert herself into every aspect of our lives.
    via Honeybellmama
  • Last week, I suggested marriage counseling. He looked genuinely confused. He of course went and talked to Sarah about it I found out from another coworker that she's been telling people that
    via Honeybellmama
  • Mark and I are "going through a rough patch" and that she's "just being a good friend by giving him someone to talk to." We weren't going through anything until she started this nonsense!
    via Honeybellmama
  • The breaking point? I stopped by his office to surprise him with lunch (I know, I know, but it was his birthday and Sarah was supposedly out sick). Guess who was there? Sarah. She'd
    via Honeybellmama
  • "miraculously recovered" and bought him a cake that said "To my work hubby" with a photo of them from the office holiday party. She saw me and said, "Oh, Amy! You came too... how nice. Mark, you didn't tell me your real wife was coming!"
    via Honeybellmama
  • Happy Bathay
    via Guillermo Spelucin
  • I'm not crazy, right? This woman is trying to destroy my marriage while my husband stands there grinning like it's all some big joke. What do I do? Divorce seems extreme, but I'm running out of options here.
    via Honeybellmama
  • TL;DR: My husband's "work wife" is actively trying to sabotage our marriage while he remains completely oblivious to her obvious manipulation.
    via Honeybellmama
  • ETA: I should have stated that the promotion wasn't one that would increase his salary but his title. It would give him more leadership experience. It still blows my mind that he
    via Honeybellmama
  • turned it down just so he could stay on the same team as her. ETA: I should have told the mug story in its entirety. She "accidentally" broke the mug.
    via Honeybellmama
  • I noticed it was gone when I was visiting him one day and I asked him about it. He said she accidentally knocked it over and then later he repeated a "joke"she made about how it didn't fit the office aesthetic.
    via Honeybellmama
  • Forward_Most_1933 You have a husband problem. Go to counseling and get professional help to communicate your concerns. Remind him that he's married to you, not Sarah so her
    via Forward_Most_1933
  • opinions shouldn't matter when it comes to your marriage. Good luck, but be prepared for the worst.
    via Forward_Most_1933
  • MedievalMissFit Sarah would not be able to sabotage your marriage if your husband wasn't allowing it.
    via MedievalMissFit
  • Thelostsoulinkorea Your husband totally knows what is happening and is just ignoring you. Time to get counselling or time to think about whether the marriage is worth it.
    via Thelostsoulinkorea
  • I'm a guy, and this screams him enjoying having two girls fawning over him. There is just no chance in h I he doesn't know the other girl is wanting him. Also turning down the promotion is mental!
    via Thelostsoulinkorea

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