Girlfriend makes a 'joke' about cheating on boyfriend at dinner, boyfriend leaves the date: 'She is already cheating, no one tests about that'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Feb 18, 2025 6:00 PM EST

Some jokes push the boundary of what is okay and what isn't okay to say. The best comedians toe this line deftly. They present it in such a way that flirts with the so-called "line," but doesn't cross it. They've probably put in hours and hours of work honing that line in front of crowds, and friends, testing the waters to see what they can get away with. Even the most lauded comedians, though, sometimes miss the mark. They couldn't read the room and crossed the line. It's tough to make an edgy joke. 

It's especially tough to make an edge joke if you're not a comedian. Say, for instance, you're a woman out on a dinner date with your boyfriend, and you try to test the waters by making a "joke" that flirts with some dangerous topics. Odds are, this is probably not going to go well for you, and you should have probably not tried in the first place. 

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10469369856
    via René Ranisch

  • That's what happened in this situation, where an attempt at a joke turned into a spoiled night for everyone involved. The boyfriend was left wondering, though, whether or not he overreacted to the moment. Read on for the story and see what you think about it. 

  • 02

    AITA for leaving a date after my girlfriend made a "joke" about cheating on me?

    I've been dating my girlfriend for almost a year. Last night, we went out to dinner, and while we were waiting for our food, she laughed and said something like: 'You wouldn't mind if I cheated on you, right? It's just a joke!'
    via u/sweet-cupcake12
  • 03
    I felt uncomfortable and asked why she would say something like that. She laughed even more and said: 'If you got mad, it would mean you don't trust me. It's just a test.'
    via u/sweet-cupcake12
  • 04
    At that moment, I completely lost the desire to be there. I paid for my part of the bill, told her I didn't like the "joke," and left. Now she's texting me, saying I was immature and that she just wanted to see my reaction. AITA for leaving the date instead of continuing the conversation?
    via u/sweet-cupcake12
  • 05

    Commenters chimed in on whether or not they thought this was okay

    Competitive_Key_2... . 3h ago Write back "You've seen my reaction. Now this is a test to see if you will be fully accountable for your actions."
    via u/Competitive_Key_2981
  • 06
    mustang19671967 • 3h ago She is already cheating, no one tests about that crop
    via u/mustang19671967
  • 07
    blooming Thorns • 3h ago . Definitely NTA. Playing mind games and testing your partner's trust is not okay, and leaving was the mature way to handle the situation. Don't let someone manipulate you like that.
    via u/bloomingThorns
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10469376768
    via Unsplash+ (Meg Aghamyan)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09
    BeetFarmHijinks • 3h ago NTA, she saw your reaction. Little high school kids do these idiodic "tests" when they are 15 and don't know what adult relationships are.
    via u/BeetFarmHijinks
  • 10
    I am married 25 years, and let me tell you something. Life is enough of a test. You don't need to waste time with someone who would pull this sh. You're a grown adult. Let her date someone who is willing to deal with this level of immaturity, maybe a YouTube prankster.
    via u/BeetFarmHijinks
  • 11
    SockMaster9273 . NTA 3h ago Don't make those kinds of jokes. Don't test you partner. Never ends well. Also, "you wouldn't be mad if I cheated on you, right," she cheated or she is planning on cheating.
    via u/SockMaster9273
  • 12
    "If you got mad, it would mean you don't trust me. It's just a test," a test to see if you know your worth and seeing if you have a loyal partner? Leaving the restaurant means you pass with flying colors.
    via u/SockMaster9273
  • 13
    cheerfulpetalfizz • 3h ago Testing loyalty with fake cheating jokes is a red flag, not a personality trait.
    via u/cheerfulpetalfizz
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    PaymentDiligent75... . 3h ago Testing your parter is ick anyway, but this sounds like she isn't testing, she is fishing for how honest she can be without consequences.
    via u/PaymentDiligent7550
  • 15
    boscoroni . • 3h ago She says something foolish and incendiary and claims you are immature? She is not a serious mate for you. In fact, the woman is a fool.
    via u/boscoroni
  • 16
    Gemfyre1 3h ago When someone "jokes" like that, ask them if they enjoyed the "punchline" as you break up with them. NTA
    via u/Gemfyre1
  • 17
    • phred0095 3h ago NTA. Is she in fact cheating on you? Was this just a way of testing the waters? Look I will acknowledge that we all say stupid things on occasion. But I have never joked about cheating on my wife, beating my wife, setting my wife's car on fire, anything negative about her.
    via u/phred0095
  • 18
    montauk6 3h ago • A lonnng time ago, in a lifetime far farrrr away... my then-girlfriend, out of the blue, asked me how I would feel about us seeing other people. It took me aback but in hindsight it was definitely the precursor to her telling me that she met someone else and she was done with me.
    via u/montauk6
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    Of course, again in hindsight, it was the best thing to happen to me because about 3 years later I met someone with whom I fell head over heels in love, and with whom, this past summer, I celebrated our Silver Anniversary (25 years of matrimonial bliss for those keeping score).
    via u/montauk6
  • 20
    BUT I DIGRESS!... NTA, the bottom line is don't choke on those smoke signals, Kimo Sabe. As the Old Philosopher sez, "Behind every little joke, there's a bit of truth..." Take heed, my friend.
    via u/montauk6
  • 21
    Natural-Ad9132 • 3h ago Dude, you're dodging a bullet. If shes testing the waters with questions like that she's already messing around.
    via u/Natural-Ad9132
  • 22
    Try Again12345 • 3h ago Well, she got what she wanted - she saw your reaction. NTA.
    via u/Try_Again12345
  • 23
    Trasht79 3h ago People "testing" their partners like this is toxic and ab ive. She just let you know she's a walking red flag.
    via u/Trasht79
  • 24
    -whiteroom- . 3h ago The test was to see if you would let her cheat. People who "test" their partners s k. Don't let her gaslight you. The test is immature, not your reaction
    via u/-whiteroom-

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