Woman gets fired after she oversleeps and misses her shift, she blames fiancé for turning off her alarms, he refuses to take responsibility: ‘She had eight strikes already’

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Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Feb 28, 2025 9:00 AM EST

One thing that no one is ready for when your relationship is getting serious, is how hard it's going to be to accommodate living together. No one prepares you for how much sacrifices you are going to make for your significant other, and how much learning there is going to be from either side. 

When it comes to living with your partner, communication is key. Yes, we know how cliché this phrase is, but it's cliché for a reason. It's because, without proper communication, all relationships are basically doomed. You have to be ready to talk about everything, and not hide a single thing from each other. If you're not ready for that, you may as well pack your bags and call it quits while you still can.

We're not sure if the couple in the story below is ready to call it quits on their relationship, but they are definitely not communicating as they should. As the boyfriend describes their relationship more and more, it is clear they are not on the right path, but will they do something about it? Keep reading to find out…

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    via Parkpoom

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITAH for unintentionally getting my fiancé fired from her job?"

    My fiancé (24F) and I (28M) have been together for five years, and since the beginning, she's had a terrible habit of ignoring her wake-up alarms. She sets 10-15 alarms over the
    via _daddy_salsa_
  • course of an hour every morning. I'm the complete opposite. I am a light sleeper, so once I wake up, I have a hard time falling back to sleep. This makes it exceptionally hard when there is a new
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  • alarm going off every 10 minutes or so. I work from home, so I typically get to sleep in until 9:30. She on the other hand has to be physically at work by
    via _daddy_salsa_
  • 8:30 and typically has alarms running from 6:00 all the way through 7:30. Over time, this has made me resentful of her sleeping habits, and I've often resorted to sleeping in the guest room just to get proper rest.
    via _daddy_salsa_
  • Recently, her work schedule has switched from mostly opening shifts to almost all closing shifts. This was a huge relief for me since I could finally sleep through the
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  • morning without interruptions, and we got to share a bed again. Last Wednesday, I was jolted awake at 6 AM for the first time in months. Since she had
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  • casually mentioned earlier in the week that she was closing every day, I assumed she had forgotten to turn off her alarms. Wanting to get a few more hours of sleep, I turned
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  • them all off and reset them to 10 AM, her usual wake-up time for closing shifts. When 10 AM rolled around, I heard a scream from the bedroom. Turns out she was
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  • supposed to open that day. She rushed to work but was fired on the spot for leaving the store unopened for well over an hour.
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  • At first, I was shocked and felt terrible. But then I found out the real reason she had been switched to closing shifts: she had been repeatedly late for opening shifts, receiving eight
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  • warnings / strikes over a one- month period. Her boss had given her closing shifts as a last-ditch effort to keep her employed. She never told me any of this. Keep in mind that
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  • at this point, I was consistently sleeping in the guest room, so by the time I got up for my job, she would already be out the house, so I had no frame of reference to tell if she was running late or not.
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  • Now she's furious with me, blaming me for her getting fired, and even wants to postpone our wedding. While I understand why she's upset, I also feel like this was entirely preventable. If she had just
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  • told me she was struggling to wake up, I could have helped. She's been distant and nasty towards me, and at this point, I'm over it. She made zero effort to do better when I said that her alarms were messing
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  • with my sleep, failed to communicate effectively throughout the whole situation, and in my opinion, lied by omission about her standing at her job. As of right
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  • now I am back to sleeping in the guest room and we are hardly speaking. I have told her that until she sees her part in all of this, there's no discussion to be had. AITAH???
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  • 2 Q W A 13 S Z E 10AM Alarm, every day 7:15AM Alarm, every day 7:20AM Alarm, every day 7:25AM Alarm, every day 7:30AM Alarm, every day 7:35AM Alarm, every day M
    via Leung Cho Pan

  • We personally think that the relationship here suffers from a lot more than a few missed alarms. The girlfriend was unwilling to communicate her situation at her job, they were already sleeping in separate bedrooms before even getting married, and turning off someone's alarms without so much as a word is actually so bizarre.

    What do you think of this situation? Keep scrolling to read the comments and let us know below!

  • YessikaHaircutt This person is not responsible enough to get married
    via YessikaHaircutt
  • Informal-Arrival678 NTA. Your fiancée didn't get fired because you turned off her alarms, she got fired because she couldn't show up on time nine separate times.
    via Informal-Arrival678
  • Scared_Muffin5676 Ask yourself if this is really the life you want to live between now and dood. I wouldn't want to marry anyone I have to babysit.
    via Scared_Muffin5676
  • LSPassions NTA. She didn't fill you in on her real work situation, so how were you supposed to know? It's on her to manage her alarms and communicate better. If she had eight strikes already, missing another shift is on her, not you.
    via LSPassions
  • mfruitfly ESH. You are the most minor of AH's because you should have woken her up when her alarm went off instead of assuming it was a mistake. The best approach is always to ask,
    via mfruitfly
  • never assume, and since this was out of the ordinary- it had been months since she worked an opening shift- you absolutely should have shaken her awake and asked her. But, you are not THE reason she got fired. She has been
    via mfruitfly
  • late and has never figured out a successful way to complete a basic adult task-h | kids too it too- about waking up at the right time to be on time. She has had a pattern that got her in trouble at work, this isn't on you.
    via mfruitfly
  • Noodle_Sewp YOU'RE NOT EVEN MARRIED YET AND SLEEPING SEPARATELY!! Do you really need strangers to clue you in here?
    via Noodle_Sewp
  • Environmental_Crab59 YTA for messing with HER alarms. But you didn't get her fired. You did contribute, though.
    via Environmental_Crab59
  • Jazzlike-Flounder882 ESH. You don't accidentally forget to turn off 10-15 alarms. If they were on, they were on for a reason. YTA for making the assumption this was a mistake. Your story seems curated to put you in the best light.
    via Jazzlike-Flounder882
  • Street-Length9871 YTA - her behavior is not what OP is asking about, and OP reset her alarm without asking and cost her her job. It was the final straw for her job and OP broke the camels back.
    via Street-Length9871
  • Brilliant-Attitude35 NTA. You want to have kids and acquire debt with this person?! That's a bad choice.
    via Brilliant-Attitude35

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