Job requires a typed reason for any time away from keyboard, employee hilariously and maliciously complies: 'I cannot leave my laptop alone'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 2, 2025 4:00 PM EST

No one likes a micromanager. In my experience, people work best when you trust them. If they know that they're valued and trusted and able to do their job in their own way, then they will thrive. They're (presumably) not children, so they don't need to be treated as such. Independence makes everyone happier. But that's not every employer's philosophy of management. Some feel the need to do everything in their power to control what their workers are doing at every minute of the day. This kind of scrutiny is hard to thrive under, as you feel the eyes of Big Brother, always looking over your shoulder for someone watching. 

That's the situation this employee found themselves in at their job, which implemented a piece of technology perfect for micromanaging. Every time they left their keyboard idle for any amount of time (even 10 minutes), they were required to submit a reason for the absence. 

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  • 01
    Thing Contact
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • This employee, though, wasn't going to take that lying down. They found a way to poke fun at the requirement and gave some hilarious answers to appease the work overlords. Scroll on and be grateful that your job doesn't require this (hopefully), and read one worker's funny responses. 

  • 02

    Throwback to my last company that required explanation every time you unlocked your screen.

    I really, really submitted these responses and that's how I knew no one read them.
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 03
    P ProHance PROHANCE X Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 00:10:00 since 24 Mar 2022 01:01:34. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 01:01 0 To: 01:11 t Activity: Select Activity Description* Select Activity Client Call Electricity Shut Down/Internet Down Time Lunch Break Short Break For multiple activities during this period, modify the dura Team Meeting Add Work Call Work Review JaMocha Tech Pvt. Ltd. 2009-2022
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 04
    P ProHance PROHANCE X Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 00:44:06 since 24 Mar 2022 13:14:37. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 13:14 Description To: 13:58 Activity: Lunch Break WAS EATING FOOD. APOLOGIES FOR TAKING SO LONG. I WILL TRY TO FINISH EATING IN 10 MINS FROM NOW ON For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and 'Add' to the activity list. Add JaMocha Tech Pvt. Ltd. 2009-2022 Save
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 05
    ProHance PROHANCE Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 00:54:20 since 25 Mar 2022 09:06:54. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 09:06 Description* To: 10:01 Activity: Client Call CLIENT INSISTED ON A FACE TO FACE MEETING. EVEN THOUGH I TOLD HIM I CANNOT LEAVE MY LAPTOP ALONE AND NEED TO FURIOUSLY TYPE TO KEEP TIME ALIVE. CURSES TO HUMAN INTERACTION!! For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and 'Add to the activity list. I
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 06
    ProHance X PROHANCE Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 01:48:35 since 25 Mar 2022 12:38:14. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 14:23 => To: 14:26 Activity: Work Review Description ITRIED TO TELL THEM THAT GETTING UP AND "TALKING" TO PEOPLE F2F IS SO LAST GENERATION, THE NEW THING IS COMMUNICATION VIA LAPTOPS. BUT "SOME PEOPLE" REFUSE TO CHANGE For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and 'Add' to the activity list. Add
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 07
    ProHance PROHANCE × Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 01:48:35 since 25 Mar 2022 12:38:14. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 12:38 - To: 14:23 Activity: Work Review Description YOU WOULD THINK THAT WORK MEETING WOULD REQUIRE A LAPTOP BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG. APPARENTLY THERE IS SUCH A THING AS A "PROJECTOR" AND "SCREEN SHARING". | I WHO KNEW?? For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and 'Add' to the activity list. Add
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 08
    ProHance PROHANCE × Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 00:52:15 since 26 Mar 2022 12:20:01. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 12:20 = To: 13:12 Activity: Electricity Shut Down/Internet Down Time Description THE SATISFACTION OF NOT GETTING PAID WHILE WORKING OVERTIME AND ON WEEKENDS SURPASSES THE JOY OF BEING WITH FAMILY, WHY HAVE A WIFE, WHEN YOU CAN HAVE WORK? For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and 'Add to the a
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 09
    ProHance PROHANCE Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 00:16:59 since 26 Mar 2022 12:01:09. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 12:01: To: 12:18- Activity: Short Break Description "FORGET THE SOUND OF BIRDS," I SAID TO MYSELF AS I WOKE UP, "IT IS SO MUCH BETTER TO HEAR THE SOUND OF YOUR INCOMING EMAILS AND A CONSTANT BARRAGE OF PINGS FROM TEAMMATES. IT IS WHAT MAKES US HUMAN. For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and 'A
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 10
    ProHance X Activity Away From System You have been away from your system for 01:21:07 since 20 Apr 2022 14:21:43. Please provide activity details during this period. From: 14:21: To: 15:42 Activity Team Meeting Description police sirens (high speed car chase ensues) *screech to a halt (an ostrich descends from the driver seat) For multiple activities during this period, modify the duration and Add to the activity list. Add JaMocha Tech Pvt. Ltd. 2009-2022 Save
    via u/PotatoFloats
  • 11

    Other workers felt thankful that their jobs didn't require this.

    marcgw96 • 9h ago Posts like these make me realize how good I've had it at my job. What the h_.l
    via u/marcgw96
  • 12
    veg... 8h ago Edited 8h ago I'm having flashbacks once to when I put "pizza time!" as a comment on my timesheet for a 15-minute idle period because someone left pizza in the break room. (There was an expectation that we had 90% client-billable time, and 10% would be administrative busywork, answering emails, doing training, etc.)
    via u/veggiesama
  • 13
    While enjoying a delicious pepperoni slice, I got pulled into a conversation with my coworkers about a related project. It was not billable project time but still time I spent at work learning about my new job. Two weeks later, my manager called me into her office and told me, in no uncertain terms, to never do that again. I think she used the word "flippant" to describe my timesheet crime.
    via u/veggiesama
  • 14
    I learned a very important lesson that day about professionalism in the office and the importance of honesty. I learned it's easier to just lie.
    via u/veggiesama
  • 15
    Jacks Deluxe • 9h ago "WHY HAVE A WIFE WHEN YOU CAN HAVE WORK" truly had me howling out loud.
    via u/JacksDeluxe
  • 16
    imbaconman • 9h ago The funny thing about this is that when there's a overflow of comments/submissions then no one would ever read them
    via u/imbaconman
  • 17
    品
    via Unsplash+ (Curated Lifestyle)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 18
    esepinchelimon 8h ago • Absolutely insane levels of micromanaging
    via u/esepinchelimon
  • 19
    DaCriLLSWE • 9h ago . i had this sh on work but it was an aquired field every time i changed orders, (going from on production order to another).
    via u/DaCriLLSWE
  • 20
    I spent a year there just making up the dumbest answer to "why are you changing orders". like WHY THE FK why i not? Name ome production company that does 1 fking thing day in and day out?
    via u/DaCriLLSWE
  • 21
    • GodlessPacifist 8h ago Dude f THAT and also these are god-tier responses
    via u/GodlessPacifist
  • 22
    SwingmanSealegz • 8h ago . I would've typed out a whole filibuster and logged how many hours I wasted.
    via u/SwingmanSealegz
  • 23
    SnyperwulffD027 • 9h ago Please tell me you had supervisors questioning things, I'd love to learn that sh got changed solely because you guilt tripped them.
    via u/SnyperwulffD027
  • 24
    DoorDashCrash • 8h ago Here I am at work watching 2- 3 hours of YouTube videos and playing games occasionally while at work. I cannot imagine working in an environment like this.
    via u/DoorDashCrash
  • 25
    . urbanorium 8h ago With sh like this I just type a "" and move on.
    via u/urbanorium
  • 26
    Desperate_Set_7708 • 7h ago I'm intolerant of this level of micromanagement I'd write snarky, profane comments. "Last call with our well known, highly problematic client was very unpleasant and left me filled with anxiety. Went to restroom to jerkoff for stress relief."
    via u/Desperate_Set_7708
  • 27
    Ok_Risk8749 • 8h ago I would feel so slimy developing that software. I don't know if you were WFH, but if you got those notices while in office, I would just fill just every inactivity as "just RTO things". I wonder if someone is actually paid to read these things and if they have the same sh on their computer. installed
    via u/Ok_Risk8749

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