Husband's unemployed in-laws demand he pay for their family vacation, he and wife split as she folds under pressure to "take one for the team"

Author image for Ely Bulnes
Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Mar 2, 2025 8:00 PM EST

Have you ever been on a big family vacation? That is, not just with your nuclear family, but with your extended family as well? I've done so several times throughout my life. As a kid, it's just a blast to be able to spend so much time with cousins in an unfamiliar place. For adults, it can be a bit of a logistical nightmare figuring out how to split bills and where to go based on everyone's interests. Whether you're a parent or child, an extended family trip is always a nightmare if you don't like all of the people you're vacationing with.

In our story today, a couple's Spring Break plans fizzle out with their in-laws. This is great news to our protagonist who didn't want to be stuck on a trip with people he doesn't really like or get along with. All is well until the entitled pair straight-up demand that our protagonist pay for their inclusion in the family vacation. Scroll down for all the details.

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  • 01

    AITA not "taking one team" and not paying my SIL and her family come on our Spring Break trip?

    "I know y'all can pay for our trip. Just pay for it."
    via travnikovstudio

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Twice a year, my wife, three kids, and I go on a trip with just us. During Spring Break, it is a domestic trip. During summer, it is an international trip. These two trips are my favorite things we do throughout
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 03
    the year. We live very frugally throughout the year, but during these trips, we do it big. The money for the trips comes from separate, non-martial passive income I have from a family commercial real estate business (in case anyone is wondering, we have a prenup).
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 04
    Cheezburger Image 10474654208
    via FatCamera

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 05
    After our trip last summer, my SIL (wife's sister) told my wife that her husband and her were going to save up and come on next year's trips (ie. the 2025 trips) with their two kids. My wife didn't push back. I heard about this a couple of months later and was
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 06
    quite frustrated. I do not like my SIL at all (it is a long story). My wife convinced me to be ok with it by laying out that they will get their own accommodations and outside some shared meals, I did not need to spend much time with her.
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 07
    Well, in January, my BIL's job issued a "return to the office" directive. He was working remotely and lived out of the state of his office. They offered a short window for anyone who did not want to return to resign and get a good severance package. He resigned and took the severance. After that
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10474653952
    via bongkarn thanyakij from Pexels

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 09
    happened, they decided they could not come on the trip. There is a chance they will need to sell their house and move in with my in-laws. Well, about two weeks ago, my MIL, wife, and SIL were spending the day together. My SIL kept being up how upset she
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 10
    was about the whole thing and about how much she was looking forward to the trip. My MIL pulled my wife aside and said, "I know y'all can pay for the trip. Just pay for it." So, my wife offered for us to pay for it.
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242

  • Oh, that is very brazen of her. Just a straight-up demand to have their vacation paid for. What on earth makes them think they're entitled to something like that?

  • 11
    After my wife told me this, I was livid. I said, "You want me to pay for the terrible experience of doing this trip with your sister? No, I will not do it under any circumstances. This is a two 'yes' and one 'no'
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 12
    situation, I am a 'no' so she isn't coming." My wife thinks I should take one for the team and pay. I refuse. I do feel bad for her kids. But, I am not paying for the displeasure of being around my SIL. Heck, I have offered to take her kids only on the trip.
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242
  • 13
    I would be fine with that. They can stay with us. But, right now, I am left with either effectively doubling the cost of the trip or having them stay with us on the trip, which is counter to why I agreed to let her come in the first place.
    via u/ExternalSurprise7242

  • This is how you know the in-laws are entitled; they absolutely refuse to compromise. If this was about not letting their kids down after getting their hopes up, they would have been ecstatic at our protagonist's offer. 

  • 14
    Cheezburger Image 10474653696
    via Imgorthand

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 15
    SteampunkHarley If MIL wants her to go so bad, she can pay for them
    via u/SteampunkHarley
  • 16
    DuckDuckWaffle99 "Hey, MIL, take your hand out of my wallet and put it in your own purse."
    via u/DuckDuckWaffle99
  • 17
    Chemical_World_4228 NTA, you start this and they will expect to go on every vacation you go
    via u/Chemical_World_4228
  • 18
    MoonlitMeloddy Your SIL's finances aren't your responsibility. Paying sets a bad precedent and you even offered to take her kids. Your money your choice.
    via u/MoonlitMeloddy
  • 19
    Sanalnara Exactly if MIL thinks it's so important she can cover the cost instead of expecting you to pay for something you don't even want in the first place.
    via u/Sanalnara
  • 20
    Idontlikesoup1 Well, when you lose your job, it is totally ok to skip an expensive trip 6 months later anyway. You can also ask your wife if she thinks they should come and be financed by her, using her own 'fun' money for that part of the trip. I wonder if her narrative would be affected... (I actually don't wonder at all)
    via u/Idontlikesoup1
  • 21
    Miami_Lawyered NTA. It is time for your wife to "take one for the team." You already took one by agreeing to let her come on the trip in the first place.
    via u/Miami_Lawyered
  • 22
    WeeklyBloom The problem is, there is no team. There is wife and her family of origin vs OP and his family. Wife wants to play on both teams and that never works out.
    via u/WeeklyBloom
  • 23
    justwalkawayrenee This is a huge wife problem. I'd tell wife she shouldn't unilaterally make offers she can't fulfill. I'd further tell her that her mother doesn't get a vote in how you spend your expendable income. (I'd probably tell mil that myself, actually. It seems your wife has little backbone).
    via u/justwalkawayrenee
  • 24
    This. DogsNSnow I get why he has a prenup now, and is very clear about his income from the commercial property that is separate from their shared income. S ks that he's trying to do a really fun thing for his family but his entitled in-laws need to ruin it.
    via u/DogsNSnow
  • 25
    NTA. KhaosSlash If your wife wants to take one for the team, she can spend HER Money for them.
    via u/KhaosSlash
  • 26
    Old Cheek1076 NTA - You have a serious problem: it is more important to your wife to make Mommy happy than you, even to the point of making you unhappy.
    via u/Old_Cheek1076
  • 27
    Silver_Living_7341 Tell your MIL to pay for her daughter's family trip. ? Are you the family ATM?
    via u/Silver_Living_7341
  • 28
    joemc225 You just tell them, "My wife didn't understand that our budget doesn't have the funds to double the cost of our trip. We'd have to cancel the trip, before we could afford to do that. Sorry".
    via u/joemc225
  • 29
    Celtic_Dragonfly17 NTA, don't do it. If you do, watch them expect it every year.
    via u/Celtic_Dragonfly17
  • 30
    sd4k2 Yup, one year kid asked if we could pay for boyfriend to join us on a trip as their birthday present, we said yes and now they want us to pay for him every time they join us.
    via u/sd4k2

Tags

family drama marriage wife reddit story married life husband mother in law entitled spring break family reddit thread Reddit unemployment family vacation entitled people vacation
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