Woman breaks up with boyfriend after he reacts poorly to her career success, forcing her to choose between him and her job: ‘This is why all your exes dumped you’

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  • "He didn't even congratulate me"
  • "AITA for telling my boyfriend it's his fault that all his women have dumped him afyer he reacted poorly to my career success and wanted me to choose?"

    Last week, I (F41) took my boyfriend (Tony M42) ( 5 years together) out on a date to celebrate a huge career milestone. Since 2014, I've been working
  • towards getting a very comprehensive project from concept to reality. I took all the steps, got into a better situation 6 years ago, and I got commitment from investors to take it into its next phase.
  • Tony is an engineer ( important to the story), we met in college, and I've always considered him smart and a bit of my dream guy. I thought we would have a quiet dinner,
  • reaffirm being there for each other, and then go haves Instead, I had to hear him ranting, saying how unrealistic I am and that I'm biting more than I can chew. Not gonna make this too long, so the whole
  • thing sounded like a "who do you think you are?" From him. I had to explain there's no way I'm trying to bite too much. I have built my credibility, have worked very hard to establish a
  • decent track record, and acquired solid associates to bring additional standing for our project. Still, he made very derogatory remarks (the kind one does when in disbelief or chronic
  • disapproval) and said nothing is going to happen, that I'm stuck and that I compromised myself, for which he is concerned. I'm mad at myself for not saying anything on the
  • spot. Instead, I've been overthinking. He and I had plans to get married, raise our kids in a blended family, and grow old together.
  • He didn't congratulate me. he didn't even give me a celebratory kiss. I haven't even cried yet because I'm numb. The things he said struck a chord and in a bad way. So basically, he thinks
  • that I've been "lucky". I did talk to him about it after I went to my place, and he doubled down with suspicions of cheating on my part. He says there's no way I could get this far. I
  • asked if he's mad because my project would also include his industry (which he's very proud of), and he denied it. This is like an ice bucket to my head. We tried to talk 2 nights ago at
  • his place, and I left feeling worse. He says he wants a partner to enjoy life together and that I'm too old to dedicate myself to a massive project because I should have done it earlier.
  • I don't understand, since years ago, he wanted a successful woman for himself. He said I needed to make up my mind between my reality, which is our tangible relationship, and my perceived new developments.
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  • I reminded him about what he said, and that his words about me cheating or sleeping my way through my career was especially disrespectful because he knows I was s--- | sed
  • at some point and was concerned for my safety. He said I was manipulative. He called me last night like nothing happened.I broke up with him and told him to look in the mirror and
  • ask himself why he was dumped by all of his exes. He said I was using very personal things that he told me against him and that it was disappointing. I texted him back and said I'm not
  • responsible for his reactions when he was so inconsiderate. He has been asking me to apologize since he woke up. He sounds weird and a bit dc, ressed and he says I
  • used painful situations in his past for leverage (his ex-wife divorced him, his ex fiancee cheated and left him before the wedding). I dont feel like I owe him anything, I didn't mention anything specifically, but I
  • just said it's his fault that his women run for the hill ( figuratively). AITA for refusing, although I think this affected him mentally? Edit: he works the same job since after college, with a
  • very well recognized company that comes with status and stability. He has access to nice things, and it's not like my project will affect his company.
  • Smitty-TBR2430 NTA. This is his problem, not your problem. Congratulations on your project. Best wishes moving on.
  • Large Effective_812 NTA, leave this man behind honey he is trashed and is upset that you're more successful than he is. He is jealous plain and simple. Don't be around a guy like that and stop doubting yourself.
  • Pretend-Intention-67 Tony sounds like he's a little jealous. NTA, Tony's a dork and you deserve someone who will be there to support you and celebrate these wins. Congrats on the big win, keep crushing!
  • Chuck60s You did the right thing breaking up with him. Obviously, he wasn't fully invested in you or your career. Best of luck in your venture and in finding happiness

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