25 Parenting Memes for Moms and Dads Who Need Their Own Designated Nap Time

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  • 01
    LL Cool Tweet @LLcoooltweet I made my bed and found a half eaten stick of butter in it. When I asked my child if she put anything in mommy's bed, she said "I did not put butter in it." The mystery continues. More at 11.
  • 02
    ANXIOUSLY No Idea: Daddy Blog EVER AFTER @byclintedwards You know when your baby can sit up, but they can't crawl, walk, or talk? That's it. That's the best time you will have as a parent.
  • 03
    Men will turn 4 and base their whole personality off of one of these BIGFO Firestone @mchaelschaffer 4283 4283 0000000
  • 04
    Lolo @LolOverruled It's annoying that we recognize that children need things like a summer break and several vacations a year but we think it makes sense to have adults work for 60 years with maybe 2-3 weeks off a year if you're lucky
  • 05
    * Telling my kid I'll do it in a min My kid for the entire minute *
  • 06
    my friends and all our dads listening to the laser tag employee give the instructions:
  • 07
    WHEN YOU ARE DONE FOR THE DAY BUT STILL HAVE TO RALLY FOR DINNER AND BATHTIME @SNARKANDLEMONS I don't want to do this anymore.
  • 08
    Scarlett Longstreet @ScarlettPosner I don't know who needs to hear this, but that designated toy room. you're dreaming of... those kids are just gonna drag everything out to wherever you are.
  • 09
    Me in my 20's: Having a hot girl summer. Me in my 30's playing with my kid: @themarvelousmrsmom
  • 10
    redyellowgreendance @RYGdance *** If you enjoy being interrupted on the toilet by a talent show that you are not only required to watch, but also participate in (from toilet), then parenting is for you.
  • 11
    Packing the stroller for baby's first day at the beach be like e-goaskyourdad EN SCLEAR
  • 12
    Daddy Go Fish @daddygofish My son caught me eating a bag of chips that my wife didn't know about. One day you're young and free and the next you're paying hush money to a 10yo.
  • 13
    Raising Teens Today @raisingteenstoday I used to think pull-ups and baby wipes were expensive until I watched my teenager plow through $300 worth of groceries in two days. Brace yourself toddler parents.
  • 14
    dustinnickerson Having teens is realizing that Napoleon Dynamite is in no way an exaggeration of what teenagers are actually like
  • 15
    My sock entering the dryer never to be seen again A new tupperware lid to a tub I don't own spawning In my cupboard
  • 16
    Emily TM @emily_tweets My 7 year old loves 90s punk rock. My job here is done.
  • 17
    dadandburied On weekends, my parenting style basically boils down to "whatever, man, you do you"
  • 18
    Henpecked Hal @Henpecked Hal Half the sh I say to my kids sounds like a line from a cop movie: - show me your hands! - I don't want any trouble - your fingerprints are all over this - FREEZE! - just tell me what happened & we can work out a deal - maybe it was an accident...maybe you didn't mean to do it
  • 19
    octopus/caveman @octopuscaveman Just lost a really good job because they looked up my permanent record and saw I talked back to Mrs. Williams in 3rd grade. She warned me but I didn't listen.
  • 20
    new_england_dad Thinking about becoming a parent? Start planting berries now.
  • 21
    Ron Iver @ronnui_ Are you sick of having to think of a new meal every evening? Are you tired of having to prepare food and clean up dozens of dishes? I introduce to you Shredded Cheese Over The Sink! You'll never be upset about Shredded Cheese Over The Sink!
  • 22
    Dad and Buried @DadandBuried Once you've figured out how to parent your first kid, it's already too late; the only way to put that knowledge into practice is to have another kid. Unfortunately, the second kid is so different from the first kid that none of the stuff you learned applies. It's a flawed system.
  • 23
    todd dillard @toddedillard asked my 5-year-old what she wanted for dinner and she said "not a burned quesadilla" bc in the summer of 2019 I overcooked one side of her quesadilla ***
  • 24
    Yournew Momfriend @NewMomFriend My 3 kids each have 30 minutes tablet screen time, but yesterday they learned if they agreed on what to do/watch together they could turn it into an hour and a half. So now I either have to create distrust among them or accept that they've unionized.
  • 25
    Andrew Nadeau @TheAndrewNadeau I don't know why we stopped doing show and tell after kindergarten. All my stuff is so much cooler now.

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