Dog owner refuses to share custody of beloved dog after girlfriend breaks up with him, leading to a heated custody battle over the innocent pal: ‘I can't give him up’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Apr 16, 2025 4:00 AM EDT

When a couple decides to adopt a pet together, that is almost as big a commitment as deciding to have a child together, and every pawrent here will agree. That pet is your shared child, and you would do anything for them.

Which is what makes breaking up much more complicated if it ever comes to that.

Just like a child, deciding what to do with your fluffy child is not an easy task. Each one of you probably wants to 'keep' your companion, and hold on to that important part of your life. And just like a child, neither of you will give up without a fight. Some pawrents manage to maintain a civil conversation and come up with a custody arrangement that satisfies both sides and the fluffy child. Other pawrents, handle this situation in less mature ways, which might even lead to legal actions having to take form.

That is what happened to the couple in the story below, when each of them found it incredibly hard to say goodbye to their dog. 

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  • We can't say either side has handled this situation properly, but maybe this was what needed to happen so they could finally move on. We are just left to hope that the poor doggo is not affected by this dramatic dispute, and that he will soon get to his furever home once again…

  • 01
    "He's incredibly important to me"
    via Damedeeso

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    "AITA for not giving our dog back to my ex after our breakup, even though I said I would?"

    Eight months ago, my ex (30F) broke up with me (32M) after a year and a half together. During the relationship, we bought an apartment and adopted a stray puppy-Doggy-who became
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 03
    incredibly important to me, especially after I went through a period of severe de sion and ar ety triggered by workplace h sment. Both my ex and Doggy played a vital role in my
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 04
    recovery. I even considered registering him as an emotional support animal but backed out, not wanting to change his playful nature through training.
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 05
    After we split, we agreed she would stay in the apartment while I found another place, and that we'd share custody of Doggy, alternating every two weeks. Meanwhile, we'd figure out what to do with the
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 06
    apartment (sell, rent, etc.). The apartment had issues-it needed renovations we never finished and was facing partial expropriation—so selling it seemed like a long, complicated process. She initially offered to
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 07
    buy my share but backed out when I asked how much she'd pay. Later, she proposed buying my part for two-thirds of the original value, despite us having invested more money in it for repairs.
    via Ilovemydog2025

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  • 08
    Two months ago, I went to collect some things, and she pressed me for an answer about the apartment. I said I needed more time because her offer was too low. That's when she told me she didn't want to share
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 09
    custody of Doggy anymore. I said if that was the case, we'd have to settle it legally. On the day she was supposed to hand him over, she told me she wouldn't—that I had "threatened" her and that
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 10
    Doggy was hers all along, and she'd only "loaned" him to me. I had a panic at.ck. I was devastated. Later, since I had made a counteroffer on the apartment (asking for just the cost plus
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 11
    what I'd spent on improvements), she accepted. I told her how much her actions were hurting me. She agreed to let me have Doggy one last time -under the condition that it would truly be the last time. I
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 12
    didn't want to accept, but I felt I had no choice. She kept her word and gave me Doggy. I followed through on the apartment sale. But in the month I spent with Doggy, I
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 13
    realized how deep my bond with him is. I didn't feel it was fair to be forced to give him up completely. The day before I was supposed to return him (two days ago), I texted her saying I didn't agree with how
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 14
    things were handled and asked to talk things through so we could reach a mutual agreement. She was furious and reminded me I had promised to give him back and that this was meant to be the final time.
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 15
    I truly meant to return Doggy, but when the moment came, I couldn't do it. The a....ety of possibly never seeing him again overwhelmed me. Still, I offered a compromise: she could keep
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 16
    Doggy, but we'd share custody until the end of the year so I could gradually detach from him. I sent that message yesterday, and she hasn't
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 17
    replied yet. I do feel guilty for not keeping my word, but I honestly didn't know what else to do. Am I The A_h_le?
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10494091008
    via RossHelen

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 19
    Leshunen ESH. Legally, the dog belongs to whomever is listed as the owner on the microchip of Doggy has one, otherwise whomever is listed as the owner at the vet. Also, ESAs do not require any training.
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 20
    They are not service dogs. And training also doesn't get rid of a playful nature. Many people seem to share that same thought about ESAS because they are, as a whole, the worst trained and most consistently reactive dogs I see as a vet tech.
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 21
    SliceEquivalent825 ESH you both are playing revenge on each other. It sounds like you will need to settle this legally once and for all. You made deal to return the dog and didn't- verbal agreement. As much as
    via SliceEquivalent825
  • 22
    you need the dog, she may as well. It will probably all come down to whose name is on the receipt for the animal, as it is considered property. Find yourself a good counselor.
    via SliceEquivalent825
  • 23
    Comprehensive Band586 You're a hypocrite. You complain that you were devastated when she kept the dog but now you're doing the exact same thing. But you're solely focused on your feelings with no thought to hers.
    via ComprehensiveBand586
  • 24
    Yikes44 YTA. You promised to return the dog and then you broke your promise. It sounds as if your plan was always to persuade her to let you see him and then never give him back.
    via Yikes44
  • 25
    Nanamoo2008 Is Doggy microchipped? If so, whose name is on the chip as the owner? Whose name is he registered at the vets? Those details should help prove ownership. You may need to do
    via Nanamoo2008
  • 26
    mediation or speak to a lawyer about who is legally the owner to decide which of you gets to keep him.
    via Nanamoo2008
  • 27
    Ilovemydog2025 OP I appreciate all your comments, especially those who took the time to read the post. I want to share that we finally reached a legal agreement. My ex agreed to continue with the shared custody we had before
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 28
    (this time for a month instead of every two weeks) until the end of the year, and I agreed to let go of him once the agreement ends. We both love Doggy very much, and I know she will take good care of him. Some comments asked who was in a better
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 29
    position to care for Doggy. Even though I think I have the advantage (because I work from home), I know my ex will take care of him well enough for me not to worry. These have been very difficult days. I've cried a lot thinking that
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 30
    in a few months, I will no longer see that little ball of fur licking my face in the mornings. In my final reflection, I believe we were both immature and acted in our own self-interest. Did she do it to get a better deal on the apartment? Could I have reached
    via Ilovemydog2025
  • 31
    an agreement with her if I hadn't broken my word? Honestly, I don't know, and I think it's no longer worth having an answer. I just hope I'm mentally prepared for the day I have to say goodbye to Doggy. I never thought one could become so attached to a little animal.
    via Ilovemydog2025

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family drama dogs aita break up drama dog owner reddit story relationships doggo couples pawrents family Reddit relationship drama custody
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