Stepfather and mother try to coerce 17-year-old to spend his inheritance from his father on his step-siblings' education: 'I said no and I told them I wouldn't change my mind'

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Brad Dickson • Managing Editor
Apr 27, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

We love to dream of a windfall of cash falling into our lap, some forgotten lottery ticket tucked away in a drawer that fulfills our deepest wishes. But the monkey's paw curls at that wish, and the reality is that the vast majority of us will only see this happen from a significant loss. This kind of money can, of course, be life-changing in more ways than one.

After losing two of their closest relatives at too young an age, this teen was left with a healthy sum of money that was in part designated to be for his education. However, when he decided to go into a trade instead, his mother and stepfather approached him, asking him to use that money for his step-siblings' future and education. When the teen declined, saying that he could use the money for other things that would help him on the path towards his own future, his mother persisted and insisted that his father would have wanted it this way.

Frustrated, the teen turned to this online community to see whether or not he should be giving in to his mother's wishes or whether he should be holding onto the inheritance for himself like he wanted to.

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  • 01

    "AITA for not letting my inheritance be used for my step and half siblings when I'm not going to college?"

    I (17M) won't be going to college after high school and instead I'm going to learn a trade. I feel like it works better for my skills and generally would be a better job for me. My mom isn't super happy about it but she knows college has been pushed on me for almost two years and my mind hasn't changed. So she's accepted that she won't change my mind and nobody will.
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    Cheezburger Image 10498527232
    via Jeremy McKnight

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    Here's why my post is here. My dad di d when I was 6. When he was 9 my grandmom (his mom) d d and it was due to medical negligence/malpractice and my grandpa, uncle and dad were awarded compensation, a huge amount too, for her death. Granddad split it between my dad and uncle. He was working and received social security benefits for them because grandmom di d and he knew she'd want them to be taken care of above everything. When my dad realized he was sick he made sure that money would go to me,
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  • 04
    My mom has been married to her husband for 9 years. My parents were separated when dad di d, btw. Her husband has a son who's a year younger than me and has a medical condition. My mom also has two kids with her husband/my half siblings. Because of my stepbrother's medical condition and his mom not being in his life or his mom's family, they don't really have any savings for his college anymore (they had to spend it for some medical stuff) and my half siblings have nothing either.
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  • 05
    My mom and her husband think that since I have the money and won't be using it for college, I should give it to my stepbrother and half siblings and let them pay it back if I insist but that I could also just give it to them as a way to help them with their futures and be a good brother. I said no and I told them I wouldn't change my mind. Mom asked why and I said it's my inheritance from my dad. I could buy a house with it. I could protect my future with it. I could save it
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  • 06
    for my future kids. But I don't want to risk it not being paid back when it was dad's way of securing my future. She told me he'd want me to do this and I asked her if she really thinks he'd want the money he got from losing his mom to be used on random kids that aren't me. She told me they're not random to me so yes. She believes he'd want me. to be a good brother. She told me I should really give it more consideration. AITA?
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  • 07
    OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the a hole: I wouldn't let my inheritance be used for my step and half siblings to have college funds and this might make me TA because I'm not going to college and won't need that much so quickly and mom said they could pay me back if I wanted. This means that maybe I'm being really selfish.
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  • 08
    BeeJackson NTA - Congratulations on protecting yourself and your future. You have considered your mothers request and your answer is still no. If you lend them money you won't be able to get it back without suing them. If they can borrow from you then. they can borrow educational funds in other ways. You shouldn't be their only source of funding. They will take your money tend pretend like it was a gift.
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  • 09
    Make sure your grandfather and uncle are aware of the situation and your plans so your mother can't go behind your back. Unfortunately sometimes people act this way when large amounts of money are involved. Good luck with trade school and your future!
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  • 10
    MelodyRaine NTA it is not your responsibility to provide for your stepfather's child or for your half-siblings. Your mother is being disgustingly greedy trying to guilt you into taking care of her responsibilities. If I were to be brutally honest, it was irresponsible of your mother to procreate with a man who couldn't support the child he has even once, much less twice. Could you go stay with your grandfather or uncle?
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  • 11
    RedHolly First, stop calling it your inheritance. That money is bl d money. It was money paid to your family for the death of your grandmother. Every time your mother brings it up, refer to it as such. "You want me to use grandma's bl d money, that she literally d d for to pay for a kid she never met's education?"
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  • 12
    MysteryGirlWhite NTA Why should you have to risk your future because she and her husband can't provide for their own kids' futures? Not your kids, not your problem.
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  • 13
    OnlymyOP NTA. HI No, don't give them a cent. The money was meant for you. There was a reason it was put in a Trust and your Mom wasn't a Trustee.
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family dynamics teens family drama stepmother aita AITAH kids teenagers blended family siblings stepchild moms family feud parenting family pregnant reddit thread parent raising kids Parenting Fail parents children
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