'Pinged him on Teams [...] and got ghosted again': Boss ghosts employee after they verbally confirmed their raise, won't give written confirmation

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
May 16, 2025 10:00 AM EDT

Asking for a raise is not an easy thing to do. It takes a lot of self-assurance and confidence. If you're not the type of person who can easily stand up for themselves, then this is especially difficult. It might take a lot out of you to do, even if you deserve it. All you hope is that you have a manager that will respect your wishes and treat you with kindness. 

You hope that they will go to bat for you and advocate on your behalf to any higher-ups along the corporate ladder. That's the best you can ask for. And when you finally get notice of approval, then you jump for joy knowing that your hard-won battle is over. Or is it? Things could still get stuck in the chain of command and you end up losing out on money that you could have been making. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01

    Boss is ghosting me after I didn't receive my raise

    So I negotiated a raise for april with my boss. I asked for written confirmation as is standard and got somewhat brushed off (red flag...).
    via u/pointlessly_mad
  • 02
    車
    via Jeremy

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • That's what happened to this employee who thought they were receiving a raise, but it turned out that their boss might have been leading them on. Out of frustration, they turned to the internet for some help, which it provided in droves. Read on to fully understand the situation and be thankful that this didn't happen at your job… unless it did. 

  • 03
    Well, at the end of april I checked my paycheck and well, the raise wasn't calculated in. So I wrote a polite response asking for clarification as well as the written confirmation of my raise. Didn't recieve a reply. Waited another week and reached out again. Again, no reply.
    via u/pointlessly_mad
  • 04
    Pinged him on Teams and recieved and got ghosted again. Honestly starting to crash out a little since I've never been treated this unproffesional before (and well, I'll start keeping a protocol for every future meeting...). Idk what the mindset is here, is the thinking I'm just going to let it go??
    via u/pointlessly_mad
  • 05
    What would you guys do? Planning on involving HR next week and maybe legal counsel as oral agreements are binding here.
    via u/pointlessly_mad
  • 06

    Commenters gave their opinions on what this employee could do.

    JustMMlurking MM 5d ago Oral agreements may be binding but unless there was a witness in the meeting where it was agreed they will deny it and you are no further forward. Did you discuss this with any other managers at the time?
    via u/JustMMlurkingMM
  • 07
    In your position I would start looking for another job. If you cannot trust your manager you aren't going to get anywhere.
    via u/JustMMlurkingMM
  • 08
    AuthorityAuthor • 5d ago If your boss approved the raise, even if not in writing (yes, red flag), I'd give the perception that I'm assuming good intent (even though I know boss is dodging me, coward). Email to HR and cc boss:
    via u/AuthorityAuthor
  • 09
    Subject: Discrepancy in Most Recent Paycheck - Raise Not Reflected Dear HR person, I'm writing to flag a discrepancy in my most recent paycheck dated (insert date here). Boss and I negotiated a raise amount of . It appears that this raise has not been applied.
    via u/AuthorityAuthor
  • 10
    It may be an oversight, but could you look into this? Let me know if there was a delay or if additional information is needed on my end. Thank you,
    via u/AuthorityAuthor
  • 11
    333 KNA
    via Vitaly Gariev

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 12
    . HuckleberryUpbe... • 5d ago Reach out to HR and they should retro pay you from when your increase kicked in
    via u/HuckleberryUpbeat972
  • 13
    cslack30 5d ago Is this possible to have a face to face conversation with them? Teams and such are great for most work, but in situations like this you have to get the person face to face.
    via u/cslack30
  • 14
    Think of this way. "Hey Are you going to do what you said you were going to do?"
    via u/cslack30
  • 15
    ryansdayoff · 5d ago . I'd get a new job, your boss is being extremely unprofessional and this is not going to improve
    via u/ryansdayoff
  • 16
    syllo-dot-xyz . 5d ago They're trying to shake you off, be ready to lawyer up or move jobs. Similar thing happened to me after I whistleblew on my boss trying to get me to
    via u/syllo-dot-xyz
  • 17
    defraud the shareholder, he 'removed' my bonus from the system so even the CFO couldn't find it.. ..and, my lawyer dealt with the rest of his narcissistic a
    via u/syllo-dot-xyz
  • 18
    Brownie-0109 · 5d ago . The first question that comes to mind is how a boss manages an employee if they're ghosting them
    via u/Brownie-0109
  • 19
    . CaptBlackfoot 5d ago Our company announced raises to everyone and then sent a company-wide email a week later saying due to the tariffs, they were withdrawing all raises. Two weeks after that they layed off several people. If the financial situation of the company changes and you haven't signed a contract, you might be out of luck.
    via u/CaptBlackfoot
  • 20
    TW... 5d ago Edited 5d ago • • I would find a new job. If you're in a career without a lot of upward mobility and depend on raises over promotions to keep up with salary, a lot of supervisors/bosses think they can just keep you at same salary forever and pocket the difference, whether because they get credit/bonuses for keeping budget down or if they're the owner.
    via u/TW_Yellow78
  • 21
    They do that because it often works. It's never gonna get better, they'll just look for another sucker. Employees may not be able to move due to financial risk or guilt/fear and they take advantage of that. At most they'll beg you to stay and bump up your pay if they can't find someone but that just resets your cycle until you eventually end up grossly underpaid again.
    via u/TW_Yellow78
  • 22
    I had a coworker that was stuck on same salary for 20+ years. We both planned our exits after we told each other- she realized that I was getting paid 50% more than her for the same work and I realized I was never getting a raise and more work will just keep getting
    via u/TW_Yellow78
  • 23
    piled on us with them pretending they don't have money to increase salary or hire more help. They may even be unprofessional and try to skirt the law (i.e. refuse to answer phone calls/emails for references/credentialing). You want to leave these types of unprofessional bosses/supervisors as soon as possible.
    via u/TW_Yellow78
  • 24
    NOTTHATKAREN1 5d ago I went to my boss & asked for a raise. After 7 months of him ignoring me, (yes I know I waited too long, but I hate asking for money) I went over his head & asked for a raise. I got the raise in the next paycheck. It's very immature & unprofessional for your boss to ignore you.
    via u/NOTTHATKAREN1
  • 25
    Texas_sucks15 • 5d ago HR is the logical step I suppose, but dont be surprised if your boss suddenly denies that conversation ever happened. It could backfire. and the remainder of your time there would be toxic. Just a heads up
    via u/Texas_sucks15
  • 26
    Best_Relief8647 • 5d ago It sounds like whomever he went to to get approval said no. Take the hint. If you aren't happy with your pay at this point, find other work. Continuing to ask after your boss is clearly not responding is not helping you.
    via u/Best_Relief8647
  • 27
    Belle-llama · 5d ago • Look for another job. He has no intention of giving you your raise. Still to HR and escalate the issue, but I doubt you'll ever see your raise and the money owed to you for back pay. Leave them with no notice and take a vacation to reset between jobs.
    via u/Belle-llama

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

boss antiwork workplace-stories toxic-workplace job bosses work coworkers working reddit story toxic-boss workplace reddit thread bad bosses Reddit toxic-work-environment
Scroll Down For The Next Article