23-year-old woman gives best friend-turned-slacker employee a bad performance review after they request favoritism in the workplace: ‘She FLIPPED OUT’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
May 18, 2025 9:00 AM EDT

You know what they say: Never mix business and pleasure. You might end up with a bad performance review, or worse, being the reason your BFF gets put on the chopping block and eventually fired. Don't say that millions of people online didn't warn you—hiring your best friend to be your subordinate employee is probably the easiest way to end a friendship. Once you jump off the deep end into a mix of business and pleasure, you're in uncharted waters. There's no lifeguard to save you, no roadmap to get you to safety… You just have to hope that either one of you leaves for greener pastures. If not, you might end up like the two friends in this next story.

The woman who posted this story explains that her best friend really needed employment, so she decided to hire her as her subordinate. Now, there's nothing wrong with being friends with your coworkers, but it's another thing if your friend is reporting to you… Long story short, this friend is a slacker to the max, and this results in a poor performance review when the woman refuses to show her workplace favoritism. Scroll to read about the fallout…

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  • Aside from slacking off, expecting a boss to show favoritism to you is a surefire way to get fired. Nobody deserves to be treated any differently for any reason, and that includes closeness to your boss outside of work. There's a reason why you usually aren't allowed to date your boss, you know…

  • |“I'm just doing my job and treating her like any other employee."
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • "AITA for giving my struggling best friend a bad performance review after I helped her get hired?"

    I (23F) have a pretty decent job at a nonprofit that I've been at for almost 2 years. I recently got promoted to team lead which was awesome, but now I'm dealing with major drama.
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • So my best friend (24F) has been struggling with unemployment for like 8 months. She's been applying everywhere but keeps getting rejected. When a position
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • opened up at my nonprofit that she was qualified for, I hesitated but ultimately decided to recommend her. The job would report directly to me, which I knew might be awkward, but I figured we're both adults.
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • She got hired and at first everything was fine, but within 3 weeks it all went to hl. She constantly comes in late, takes super long lunches, and the
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • quality of her work is honestly terrible. I've tried giving her feedback privately but she either gets defensive or promises to do better but doesn't change.
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • Yesterday I had to evaluate everyone's quarterly performance. I gave her an honest review - pointing out her tardiness and incomplete
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • projects. She FLIPPED OUT saying I was being way harder on her than everyone else because I was "trying to prove something" and "couldn't handle having power over a friend."
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • :(
    via Getty Images For Unsplash+
  • I told her that's not fair - I'm just doing my job and treating her like any other employee. She stormed out and later texted saying I betrayed her as a friend and should have "had her back" regardless of her performance.
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • Now our mutual friends are divided. Some say I should've either declined to be her supervisor or given her more slack since she really needed this job. Others think she's being totally unprofessional.
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • I feel torn because I want to support my friend, but I also can't just ignore that she's legitimately not meeting expectations. So, AITA?
    via Due_Apartment6410
  • Regular_Boot_3540 NTA. You did set yourself up for a difficult situation by placing her in a role that you supervised, but telling you that now isn't helpful. You're acting like the boss. You owe it to yourself, your other supervisees, and your organization to give her an honest performance review. She's an
    via Regular_Boot_3540
  • adult. You've communicated with her about her less than great performance in the past. And now she expects a good performance review from you? She's the one who's unrealistic. It's going to be difficult, but continue the way you're going. Insist she improve her performance, and apply whatever kind of progressive discipline your organization supports if she doesn't.
    via Regular_Boot_3540
  • eriinana NTA - but you made a serious mistake by hiring your friend and BEING HER DIRECT SUPERVISOR. The fact that your company let this happen is insane to begin with. And this is exactly why.
    via eriinana
  • You need to go to HR immediately before she does. Provide them the text messages including the one where she acknowledged you didn't show favoritism, but should have.
    via eriinana
  • Understand they will likely fire her for poor performance and request for favoritism. Expect to be disciplined yourself as well for letting this situation happen at all.
    via eriinana
  • inara_pond NTA, you gave an honest review and likely subconsciously held back at least a little because you are friends. That would NOT have been the case if someone else was the one doing the review.
    via inara_pond
  • That being said you've definitely learned a life lesson! Never live with friends, never give friends money to borrow, and never work as a superior to your friends. (This can also be applied to family) Anytime you put yourself in one of these positions you risk ruining the relationship.
    via inara_pond
  • One Thousand_Winds NTA, she seems to be forgetting that her performance on this job also directly affects you and how the organization sees you, as you were the one who recommended her for the job. They see all these negative things and they might be wondering why you recommended her, and why she still has her job. Frankly, it sounds like she's unprofessional and needs to be let go of.
    via One_Thousand_Winds
  • Lavish_Nimue NTA, obviously it was a huge mistake to get her hired. But is she really being a good friend to you? You help her get a job and she repays it with putting you in an impossible situation by doing a really lousy job when reporting directly to you?
    via Lavish_Nimue
  • I mean yes, you might lose her friendship over this, but honestly she has not been a good friend to you in this. She could have not applied if her plan was to be this lousy.
    via Lavish_Nimue

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terrible coworkers workplace-stories favorite coworker Professional At Work work coworkers friends askreddit reddit story favoritism entitled people karma favorite workplace reddit thread Reddit entitled people
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