'They were shocked at how I left the place': Cat lover takes 7 vacation days to watch entitled friends' feline for free, only to be called ungrateful for not deep-cleaning their apartment before leaving

We have great friends, feline fam. They would do anything for us. Once, we got stuck on vacation and our cat sitter had to leave (not their fault, our flights were cancelled and our trip was extended an extra four days), so we frantically searched for someone to look after our purrecious fur babies in our absence. Our friends said yes without hesitation, and we told them to order whatever they wanted for food as we weren't sure what was even there anymore. 

We didn't expect our friend to clean because they were doing us a favor. However, apparently not everyone is as pawsitively generous as we are. After this cat lover took 7 vacation days and drove 6 hours to watch his friends' newly adopted cat while they went away for free, they returned at the end and said they were disappointed in him for the way he left their apartment. He said he tidied up, but they didn't seem to think so. Read through the whole messy situation below!

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Author image for Blake Seidel Blake Seidel
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  • 01

    Not cleaning my friends’ house after cat-sitting for a week for free?

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    via Изображения пользователя Abryutin Andrey
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    A while ago, I helped out two close friends, Steven (a good friend and former coworker) and his girlfriend Clara. We worked together for about four years until I moved away 8 months ago, but we stayed in touch and I visited a few times. I also became good friends with Clara. They live in a rented house.
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    Two months ago, they adopted a stray cat. They were absolutely over the moon! Since they'd never had a cat before and I've had cats all my life, they messaged me constantly with questions.
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    They had a one-week vacation booked before adopting the cat. Clara asked if I could come stay in their home and take care of her. She said it was a big ask, but I was the only person she trusted. I have a flexible work situation, and they're good friends, so I agreed.
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  • This guy is a saint. Driving six hours and taking vacation days to watch his friends' cat? This is a true cat lover, one who will do anything to help a cute kitty in need! Bravo to you, sir. You deserve better friends than this, anyway.

  • 05
    I used 5 vacation days, traveled 6 hours to their city, and stayed 7 days. I took care of the cat, watered plants, and sent daily photo updates. Their fridge was fully stocked, I didn't spend anything. But the week was rough. I had relationship problems, tend to overthink, and
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    the cat went into heat and meowed nonstop (they said they'd fix her before, but it didn't happen). With not much to do and the constant noise, I was really drained. Still, I got through it.
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    On day 6, I sent Steven a voice message saying I was happy to be heading home and explained how I'd clean before leaving, but some mess would remain. He replied I shouldn't worry and they'd handle it all.
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    STETHEN KING
    via Merve Bayar from Pexels

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 09
    I left the next day. Second 6 hour trip. Two hours after I got home, Steven called. Very polite, but clearly upset, he said they were shocked at how I left the place, and told me Clara could not stop crying. I was stunned. I told him I thought
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    part of the "compensation" for my help was that I didn't need to leave the place spotless. He admitted he misunderstood my message and thought I planned to deep-clean. We ended the call politely and chalked it up to miscommunication.
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  • 11
    Here's what I left: 1. Empty bottles (refundable in my country) stacked on the table. 2. Trash that could rot was taken out; cardboard and other dry trash were left in one spot.
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    3. Used towels and bedsheets in a pile near the bed. 4. Some rinsed dishes in the dishwasher, 3-4 items were rinsed but not loaded.
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  • This is what they are considering dirty? This? Dirty is trash on the floor, dirty dishes in the sink, hair all over the bathroom, clothes on the floor… a few clean dishes in the sink and some recycling is not dirty. These people are entitled to a level we can't even handle.

  • 13
    No danger in reach for the cat. I've lived alone for 9 years and have always been considered tidy. But yes, I failed to consider their much higher cleaning standards. I apologized to Steven the next day for seeing only through my own lens.
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  • 14
    Clara, however, sent a very harsh message: she was deeply disappointed, called me ungrateful, ended the friendship, and said I shouldn't even dare to justify my behavior or apologize for anything. That message hit me hard. I lashed out in return, called her ungrateful, crazy, emotionally unstable. Childish, I know.
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    Now Clara and I are done. Things with Steven are strained. The damage is done. But I still wonder: A A for not leaving the house spotless after cat-sitting for free?
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    ]] ]
    via Simol

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

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  • 17
    justanother1014 NTA. Send Steven a bill for your travel costs, unpaid work, 7 days of house sitting and travel time home. Be sure to say "deep cleaning not included."
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  • 18
    Yes, y'all should have communicated expectations better but Clara needs a reality check.
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  • 19
    anditurnedaround NTA You did the a huge favor, not one I would have ever done. Check in a cat sure.... But not fly and stay somewhere.
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  • 20
    How are you ungrateful? I'm missing something. Picking up After yourself would be nice( no dishes/trash) washing your bedding would have been polite, but not a relationship ender! After all you were doing them a really nice thing. I think they can throw sheets in the wash.
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  • 21
    hospicedoc So they asked you to come housesit their cat (for no pay) for a week so that you have to burn five vacation days and travel six hours each way, and they're disappointed that you didn't deep clean their house before you left?
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  • 22
    Clara, however, sent a very harsh message: she was deeply disappointed, called me ungrateful, ended the friendship, and said I shouldn't even dare to justify my behavior or apologize for anything. I'm sorry, I missed exactly what you were supposed to be grateful for.
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  • 23
    NTA. And good riddance- their entitlement is off the charts.
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    Decent_Front4647 They expected a deep clean? Were they paying you for your services? I don't really know what they expected, and the few things you noted don't really amount to a mess. Unless there were dirty counters and the
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  • 25
    floors were disgusting I don't really know what they were complaining about. You did them an enormous favor. Unless there's something important you left out ending a friendship because you didn't leave their house spotless is weird. NTA
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  • 26
    Alternative_Talk3324 NTA how much would it have cost to put the cat in boarding for a week? I'd find out and send them a text listing the amount they saved and tell them to hire a cleaner. FFS the audacity of some people.
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  • 27
    marypfra NTA. You saved them more than enough in pet sitting fees for them to hire a cleaner - even tho it doesn't sound like you left the house a mess.
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  • 28
    And what a complete over reaction by the girlfriend You are better off without these folks in your life.
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