Allergic husband asks wife to stop bringing her cat to bed, wife refuses and accuses him of being unreasonable and making her choose between them: “Just take stronger allergy medication”

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Aug 3, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

Allergies are the worst. It's more than unfair that some people roam the earth without the debilitating curse of allergies. Some people were born and remained bereft of that loathsome histamine reaction that no one wants to have. It could be an allergy to food, dust, creams, or animals. There's no way to measure the hopelessness of an allergy. How do you compare an allergy to wheat to an allergy to dogs? A life without pasta, or a life without petting an adorable doggo. Both seem to strip us of what should be our basic human rights to enjoying the world in all of its wondrous pleasures. 

For those of us who have spouses or partners with an allergy to a pet, it could be the worst thing. For some, it could even be a deal breaker in a relationship. We happen to know of many couples who broke up over an allergy. In the story below, the protagonist is allergic to cats, and tries to meddle between his wife and her cat. 

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  • 01

    AITA for asking my wife to stop bringing her cat to bed?

    "It disrupts my sleep"
    via akulikovskaya / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Hi everyone, I've been married to my wife for two years, and we have a generally great relationship. However, there's one issue that's been causing some
    via u/CocoEssencee

  • What a nightmare. Being with someone with a severe allergy is the worst. Not only does it directly affect your life negatively, but it's just not very attractive! Who wants to see their partner coughing and sneezing over petting a kitty cat?

  • 03
    friction lately: her cat. She had the cat before we got married, and I've always been a bit allergic, but it was manageable with medication. Recently, though,
    via u/CocoEssencee
  • 04
    she's started letting the cat sleep in our bed at night. The cat loves to curl up between us or on her pillow, which makes my allergies worse and disrupts my sleep. I
    via u/CocoEssencee
  • 05
    asked her if we could keep the cat out of the bedroom at night. I even suggested setting up a cozy space for the cat in the living room. She got really upset and
    via u/CocoEssencee
  • 06
    said that the cat is like her baby and it's always slept with her. She thinks I'm being unreasonable and that I should just take stronger allergy medication. Now,
    via u/CocoEssencee
  • 07
    I'm stuck between wanting to be comfortable in my own bed and not wanting to make her feel like
    via u/CocoEssencee
  • 08
    she has to choose between me and her cat. AITA for asking her to keep the cat out of the bedroom?
    via u/CocoEssencee
  • 09
    Not_aSynth NTA- clearly she hasn't 'always' slept with the cat if you've been married 2 years and it is now a recent
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 10
    problem. She's asking you to choose between being able to breathe at night or not. Do you have a spare bedroom/office you can set
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 11
    a cot up in that away from the cat if she doesn't budge? Judgment aside, some advice that might help: I would ask her if there is
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10537915136
    via MoonRid3r from pixabay / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 13
    anything else going on. Is the cat getting older/ more frail? Has she been super stressed out lately and in need of her cat (I have a pet
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 14
    Cheezburger Image 10537915392
    via Africa images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 15
    who provides a ton of support when I am not ok, could be same here). It wouldn't provide grounds for her to let the cat into the bedroom, but would give
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 16
    her a chance to be heard if something is going on, and maybe there are solutions to those problems themselves. Other mild things for allergies in case you aren't
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 17
    already doing so- get HEPA filter (seriously was a game changer when living with roommates), spring for higher quality air filters to
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 18
    use with your HVAC, and check on the health of the cat's skin/ coat. If the cat shedding more due to
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 19
    health stuff (diet sensitivities, ect), it's gonna irritate your allergies more. (Edit grammar)
    via u/Not_aSynth
  • 20
    TBearForever She loves the cat more than you. NTA
    via u/TBearForever

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wholesome pets allergies cute relationships couples allergy reddit thread Reddit Cats funny animals
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