Uncle demands 18-year-old niece pay him rent after taking her in, she refuses, claiming she can't afford it, he tells her to figure it out: ‘You owe us for the years we took care of you’

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Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Aug 9, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

The decision to charge children rent as soon as they turn 18 has been the topic of family disputes for years now. Some people think it is completely acceptable to expect kids to contribute to the household once they are done wth school, and are technically able to work and earn money for themselves. Others believe it is too harsh to expect kids to spend money just to be able to keep living in the house they grew up in, and would rather have their children save every penny they make for their future.

No matter which side you are on, one thing everyone should agree on is that each case is unique and should be treated individually.

For example, a 16-year-old girl who had to move in with her uncle after losing both her parents should not be expected to pay rent once she turns 18. She has been through enough, and she should focus her time and energy on her future, not on being able to afford a roof over her head. Unfortunately, her uncle doesn't seem to agree with this statement, which is why he is demanding she start paying rent. 

She has other plans, so keep scrolling to read the full story.

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  • 01

    AITA for refusing to pay rent at my uncle's house after they took me in for two years?

    I (18F) have been living at my uncle's house, "Adam" (49M) and "Melissa" (47F) for 2 years. This happened after the sudden passing of my parents.
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  • 02
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 03
    When they took me in, they were quite relaxed with me for a few weeks and then went back to their regular ways.
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  • 04
    They were a little strict, but nothing too extreme. There were some restrictions that were different but eventually nothing ended up being a big deal.
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  • 05
    A few weeks ago, my uncle and aunt sat me down and asked me to begin paying rent -- additionally with a little backlog (but i could "take [my] time on that").
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  • 06
    I told them I couldn't do that, because I couldn't afford it. All the money I was saving was going straight to my college fund and to afford two years' rent + every month from now on would mostly drain me.
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  • 07
    Adam and Melissa just shrugged and asked me to figure it out as best I can.
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  • 08
    Today, at breakfast I told them I would stay with my boyfriend, "Elias" (19M). His parents and him invited me to stay once they heard me talking about the issue.
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  • 09
    They have a two story with two free rooms currently so they told me whichever room I wanted was free.
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  • 10
    Elias and I had been dating for 3 and a half years, I'd stayed at his family's house often over the years.
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  • 11
    As I was packing, Adam and Melissa came into my room to "forbid" it. They are extremely conservative christians and said it's not a good look.
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  • 12
    They said I owed them something for the years they took care of me.
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  • 13
    They really were great the two years I stayed there, very comforting, very kind people. But I just don't want to give up my college dreams.
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 15
    I'm at my Elias' house right now and am honestly feeling bad, like I deserted them. They really were fantastic people.
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  • 16
    Typical_Self_7990 NTA They are not fantastic people. They asked an orphan to backpay "rent," which wasn't agreed upon or indicated that would be expected.
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  • 17
    Did your parents leave you anything? I would check with other family that they didn't take it from you. Look, im okay with charging adult kids who are working a nominal amount to contribute to
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  • 18
    the household. But backpay is next level. Absolutely, do not give up in your college fund!
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  • 19
    Electrical-Dingo-856 They were probably receiving money to help with your upkeep and costs That may have stopped due to you turning 18, so they need to get that money from somewhere else
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  • 20
    ZealousidealDiet7312 They probably received government benefits from your parents for you. Check into it. You were entitled to benefits from Social Security until you
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  • 21
    turned 18. I bet they already received "payment," and now that you are 18 and payments have stopped they want the money to keep coming in.
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  • 22
    AntiquePop1417 NTA at all...but you are in a precarious situation where you now rely on your bf and family. Save up as much as you can.
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  • 23
    Also: make sure you have all the documents you need and that only you can access your bank account. Research your credit if you are in the USA
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  • 24
    diwataha It's wild to me that they waited until you turned 18 to drop the "you owe us" line. That feels less like family love and more like a transaction. You didn't ask for your parents to pass. NTA
    via diwataha

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family drama aita kids mother niece reddit story parenting rent aunt uncle family Reddit money women college parents children Father
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