27-year-old gym rat seeks validation from female best friend after he proposes to his girlfriend at the gym, she sides with his fiancé's disappointment instead: 'I don't want to be proposed to when I'm sweaty and stinky'

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Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
Aug 20, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

We've all been in a situation where someone asks us – no, instists on – our honest opinion, and then when we actually say what we think, they totally freak out that it doesn't validate their feelings. When a woman's BFF finally pops the big question to his girlfriend mid-workout at the gym, he actually manages to capture her lackluster reaction and forced smile on camera. He shows his female bestie the clip, expecting her to validate his frustration that his girlfriend wasn't more enthusiastic and grateful, but he was surprised to find her agreeing with the disappointment.

It's really hard not to empathize; no one wants a life-changing, romantic moment to occur at a gym. This kind of proposal almost comes off as an ill-timed prank. My own fiance proposed to me while we were adventuring around Croatia; he kept the ring in his pocket, waiting for the perfect moment on our way to dinner. This was clever on his part for several reasons; it ensured that I was well-dressed and probably not bloated from feasting on Mediterranean food. Then, all he had to do was suggest a route to our destination by the sea, and voila… a simple proposal without any sweat stains or gym odors to ruin the moment. 

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  • 01

    AITA for telling my bestfriend I understood why his fiancee is so disappointed that he proposed to her at the gym?

    Couple embrace at a gym
    via Helgy

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story. 

  • 02
    I (27f) was excited when my bestfriend (27m) told me he had proposed to his girlfriend (29f).
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 03
    He said he had the proposal on video. I was so confused when the video started out in woman's
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 04
    gym. When I saw his girlfriend on an exercise machine in the video, I had a bad feeling. She looked so
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 05
    shocked and she said yes. She only looked happy for 2 minutes and the rest of the time she gave an insincere smile.
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 06
    PA
    via ธนารักษ์ วรการเดชา

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story. 

  • 07
    My bestfriend expressed frustration that his fiancee had confessed she wasn't happy with the proposal after he asked her
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 08
    why she looked so sad. He was venting to me and asked me how I feel if a guy proposed to me while I was at the gym. I guess he
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 09
    really expected me to agree with him, but I said I would hate it. I said I don't want to be proposed to when I'm sweaty and stinky at
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 10
    the gym. I basically explained to him that I understood why she was disappointed. My bestfriend called me shallow and a bad friend. Am I the a h le?
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 11
    Cheezburger Image 10544171008
    via mediaphotos from Getty Images Signature

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story. 

  • A lot of people react defensively in these situations. My hope is that she actually got through to him, and that after he cools down, he realizes his mistake. 

  • 12
    Wise-Matter9248 Don't ask questions you aren't ready to hear the answers to....
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 13
    I mean, I agree with you. A gym is an odd place to propose unless there is a specific reason for it, like that's where you met and you love that story, or that's how you bond, or whatever.
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 14
    He's just upset that he disappointed his fiance and he needs to come to terms with that.
    via u/Particular_Flyer
  • 15
    Lucky_Volume3819 He's not even upset he disappointed her.
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 16
    He's upset she wasn't grateful for a thoughtless proposal. After all, he said OP was "shallow," so what does that say about what he thinks about the fiancee?
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 17
    The proposal was basically a sh test, imo.
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 18
    Lucky_Volume3819 NTA. That's a super weird setting unless they're both major gym rats and I'm always wary about
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 19
    super public proposals, because it feels like the person doing the proposing is applying pressure.
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 20
    He asked you, you were honest, and he didn't like your answer. That's 100% on him.
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 21
    This response actually makes it worse. This feels like the kind of thing that was basically testing
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 22
    the fiancee like is she going to be a "cool girl" or will she be disappointed/upset by this thoughtless proposal?
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819
  • 23
    If he thinks you're shallow for not liking it, what does he think about her? Your friend doesn't sound like a great dude. I wouldn't want to be proposed to at the gym.
    via u/Lucky_Volume3819

  • There's probably someone out there that would love a gym proposal; that person is not this man's girlfriend. He should've asked and listened. 

  • 24
    Cheezburger Image 10544170752
    via Giu from Geo's Gallery

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story. 

  • 25
    KarinSpaink He's asking for your opinion because his grilfriend didn't like how he proposed, and when you agree with her, he calls you
    via u/KarinSpaink
  • 26
    'shallow'? Apparently, he was not really asking for your opinion: he wanted confirmation that his sloppy proposal was 'ok'. NTA, and he's the one who is 'shallow'.
    via u/KarinSpaink
  • 27
    KoolKoalaQueen NTAH. He asked for your opinion, and you gave it. Age old saying goes, if you don't want the truth, don't ask the question.
    via u/KoolKoalaQueen
  • 28
    And yes, his proposal seemed very lazy and I, too, would be unhappy about it.
    via u/KoolKoalaQueen
  • 29
    shelwood46 And even if everyone here found it delightful, the woman he loves hated it, yet it's more important to him to be right than give her the proposal she wants. That's not a great sign.
    via u/shelwood46

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relationship advice relationships entitled people friendship marriage gym best friends proposal couples engagement red flag healthy relationship dating
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