28-year-old fiancé gives $5K of emergency fund to his sister without consulting his 24-year-old fiancée: 'He says I’m being unsupportive and that in marriage you’re supposed to share everything.'

Emergency funds exist for very specific reasons. These funds are for emergencies only: not vacations or toys. A sinking fund is a place where you're supposed to save money for a trip to Italy, once you have a fully funded emergency fund that covers 3-6 months (or even 12) of expenses, according to some experts. Emergency funds should be used to cover basic expenses in case you lose your job or face an unexpected emergency, such as a medical calamity or a house-related issue. You should be able to plan expenses that you anticipate. You know that you're going to go to the doctor once a year for a checkup, and you know approximately how much that will cost. It might not be delightful to spend $100 on a copay instead of something fun, but that's what adulting is all about. 

If you are single, it might not be the end of the world to use some of your emergency fund for a vacation to Fire Island (ask me how I know that). But if you're married and sharing finances, you need to be on the same page about exactly where your money is going, because it's not just your money that you're misusing. 

Author image for Emmy Pratt Emmy Pratt
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