48-year-old mother forces 18-year-old son into co-signing the mortgage on the house she's buying with her boyfriend, using money meant for her son's college fund: 'My dad gave me 1k for school and she’s using it for the down payment'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Nov 10, 2025 8:00 AM EST

18-year-olds should not be financially responsible for their parents' mortgage under any circumstances.

There's a big difference between an 18-year-old helping their parents pay their rent and putting an 18-year-old's name on a mortgage that they'll be responsible for for years. A lease typically only lasts a year or two, so hypothetically, a young person could live with their parents until they're 20, help pay the rent, and move out once they can afford to take care of themselves. With a mortgage, you expect that you're going to live in the house for more than a year or two, and you can't just back out of a mortgage as easily as you can break your lease. All parties on the mortgage have to agree to sell the house before you can get rid of it. With a lease, you can at least work something out with your landlord, like subletting your place or finding a new tenant. But if your name is on a mortgage and the other people on the mortgage refuse to sell the house, you're still responsible for paying for it, whether you like it or not.

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  • A woman with short blonde hair and a serious expression
    via Vitaly Gariev

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The young person in this story is 30 years younger than his mother. He has his whole life to screw things up financially, but his mom wants him to start sooner rather than later by putting his name on the lease to the house she's buying with her boyfriend. This kid is already funding some of the security deposit.

  • Am I the bad guy for not co-singing on my mothers mortgage?

    I just turned 18 in July. My mother, who is 48, and her boyfriend are planning to buy a house in a location where I really don't want to live.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Since I'm currently living rent free, however, this isn't my decision to make right now. I previously gave my mother $2,800 as a loan for the down payment and other house buying expenses.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • My mother recently called me and said I had to put my name on the house title.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Close up business man signing contract making a deal classic business
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I was hesitant because I didn't fully understand the implications for me. When I asked why I would need to speak with the bank's mortgage representative, I specifically asked if this meant I would be cosigning the mortgage as well.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • She paused, seemed HESITANT to tell me, and then confirmed that I would be cosigning. I immediately told her I would not do it.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • She became very angry, claiming that I refuse to help her with anything. My decision. comes from the fact that cosigning would be a major financial burden and could seriously jeopardize my future plans.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Following the argument, she sent me some mean texts, stating that because she has paid for me my whole life, she hopes I never have to ask her for help because she won't give it.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • She also claims that co-signing is 'not that big of a deal."" I'm not stupid, i know this is a big deal and could affect my future.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • She also claimed she'd take my name of the mortgage and replace it with her boyfriends name.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Man with glasses smiling outdoors
    via Elliott Colburn

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I don't think it's that easy, it's easier said than done. I have a job, i've offered to help with rent, she says no.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • She wants me to be an adult in this situation but still tries to control aspects in my life, she said she wouldn't let me have a relationship with my boyfriend anymore just because i was having a bad day and she automatically assumed it was because of him.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Irrelevant but I feel as if she still wants control of me. I love my mom but this is too far.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Vdavwil Absolutely inappropriate for her to try to rope you into this like that. A decent person would never have even asked. This sliminess alone would be reason enough to refuse. In addition, it's WAY too much risk on your part. You could very easily find yourself forced to pay the whole mortgage for them or face total ruin of your credit. The only thing you would have to protect you are their good intentions, assuming they had any. It would be too much even if she was on the up and up and had
    via u/Vdavwil
  • Dave-the-architect If your mother can't come up with $2,800 as a down payment, how can she make mortgage payments? Run!
    via u/Dave-the-architect
  • OP Livid-Case-8653 Down payment is more than 2,800. That's just what i was able to help her with in such short notice. I would be living with her as well and felt like i should help her especially if she's paying me back. I feel bad because i don't want her to think i said no because i want to be petty, i just don't want to ruin the chances of having my own life and a good life with nothing in the way.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • Legitimate-Guess2669 You are stupid contrary to what your post says. 18 year old idiots don't have credit, and certainly wouldn't get a loan over the finish line by being added to the title.
    via u/Legitimate-Guess2669
  • OP Livid-Case-8653 Im stupid for denying to sign on a mortgage when i KNOW im 18 with no credit history?? there's stories of this happening to other 18/19 year olds with their parents. God forbid i deny to stupidity follow through.
    via u/Livid-Case-8653
  • KronkLaSworda Never cosign with someone you aren't married to. Period. NTA
    via u/KronkLaSworda
  • Beth21286 If you don't own it, you don't sign for it. Get your $2,800 back now.
    via u/Beth21286
  • Dave-the-architect Your own mother is trying to deceive and screw you. Say goodbye to being able to buy a home of your own any time soon if you do this.
    via u/Dave-the-architect

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boyfriend family drama house mother buying a house reddit story mortgage cosign family reddit thread Reddit mom cosigning home son buying a new home parents
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