New manager mandates unpaid “optional” happy hours to seem cool, until one employee cites labor laws, freeing the team from the pressure of socializing after hours: 'LOL okay dude, I know my rights'

Socializing with your coworkers is more delicate than most career-minded workers would expect. While the head-to-head banter with your daily team is lighthearted and like-minded, once a manager or a supervisor enters the room, suddenly the vibe has shifted from a jolly, fun conversation into a homogenized, sterile, professional tone. Nothing is casual once management gets its hands on it. 

A newly promoted team lead disagreed with this sentiment, however, and after reading one too many leadership books, he decided to do a weekly team-building activity with the workers. Except, instead of being a fun time, his little activity turned into an unpaid, after-hours, mandatory playdate with the entire department. Once he realized he couldn't force his employees to enjoy his company during happy hour, he was left with nothing but an empty tray of fries, a stale drink, and the shame of unsuccessfully sidestepping at least 10 different labor laws. 

Perhaps this will be one demerit that goes on his year-end review. "Failure to read the room" can be listed right after "Chooses bad songs at karaoke."

Author image for Jesse Kessenheimer Jesse Kessenheimer
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  • Group of team members working on a project together in the office.
    via Ivan S

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Being a good manager requires a delicate balance of aloofness and connectivity; most managers don't have it dialed in yet. Failing to recognize that they can no longer be buddy-buddy with their subordinates, ultra-connected managers come off a little bit cringey and overbearing. On the opposite side of the spectrum, unfriendly managers aren't well received by their team, becoming too distant and unapproachable to perform their duties. It's rare to have a manager who knows exactly how to be at arm's length, while also being incredibly approachable. One way to ensure that your workforce is feeling super awkward around you is to force them to socialize after hours. 

    Personally, when I'm done with work for the day, I want to go home. I don't want to continue spending time with my cubicle-mates and I certainly don't want to listen to a brown-nosing manager talk about how great they are over a pint of room-temperature drinks. Moreover, if I'm not being paid for a work-event-style after-hours chin flap, I'm not going to be there. And you better believe that the guy in this next story wasn't going to spend a minute longer with his department lead, quoting state workers' rights to get out of HH.

  • "Dressed down so I stood u["

    I worked in an office where they promoted a very new, unexperienced, unqualified, suckup from an entry level guy to a team lead. One of three under the manager.
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • There were roughly 30 people on the team. HR rules stated that he wasn't allowed to apply due to having been at the company < 1 year, had zero leadership experience, etc,
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • etc. Grievances were filed with HR and dropped despite multiple, fully qualified individuals with spotless records being in the running.
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • He was known to be a suckup, and wasn't really liked prior to his promotion. After the promotion he was wildly hate.. Apart from a couple sycophants. Quite entertaining, in retrospect,
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • how people will degrade themselves for the barest scraps of power... Anyways, middle management knew he was reviled and told him he had to find a way to get people
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • to like him. His solution was "not required but you should think of them as required" happy hours every month. For the first one, most everyone felt like they had to go and started
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • figuring out how to fit it into their schedule. Some of these people had an hour drive each way and were finding sitters for their kids.
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • These people were terrified they would lose their jobs if they missed drinking a few beers with the boss. (I should note that he has roped in everyone under the manager, I'm not even technically under this guy)
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • I knew my rights and declined the invite. He comes by my cube a few times and the day of to try to pressure me into being there. Dude, there is no way I'm spending my free time
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • with work people. You can either keep me on the clock or you can't ask me to be there, I know my rights. (I liked my team members well enough, had been to parties at their houses, etc, but I'm
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • not going out with the Team Lead under any circumstances) Team Lead did not like that, and walked away in a huff.
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • Next day everyone comes in and everyone is pretending like they had fun when it's very clear they're just trying to get away from Team Lead's attempts at chumming with them. Around 10 we
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • have a standup and he talks about how great it was to have everyone at the thing. Then he singles me out, talks about how anti-social I am, and how management notices when people aren't team players. Don't skip required events, etc.
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • LOL, okay dude. About 20 minutes later I email the entire team "Hey all, <team member> asked me about required after work events that are unpaid so I figured i'd share with
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • everyone. State statute <blah says that for hourly employees like us that we can't be required to go to these sorts of things without being on the clock. So if you can't find a sitter and can't make it, you don't need to worry at all"
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • Totally friendly, totally non- confrontational. Totally effective. Team Lead sat by himself at the bar for the next two "required but not required" happy hours and had to find another way to force people to like him.
    via i_dont_wanna_sign_in
  • Zadojla It's much easier for people to like you if you're not an asshole.
    via Zadojla
  • When I was a manager, I never scheduled social events, because my folks worked 24x7 in four locations, and there was no way to be fair (plus I don't like those kinds of events anyway).
    via Zadojla
  • Imguran It's not too hard to get people at work to like you, simply increase their pay to something reasonable - or even better - their worth. Also, don't pull crap like what happened here.
    via Imguran

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