Financially unstable sister demands sibling loan her money to help her start a business, sibling agrees only if they sign a contract, sister refuses: ‘I would never have done the same to you’

What is the biggest thing you have ever asked of a sibling?

Growing up, everyone takes stuff from their siblings, often without even asking. Sisters borrow clothes from each other all the time, and everything in your sibling's room is generally up for grabs if they are not around to see you take it. It's not a big deal; it's just another portrayal of what it is like to have a sibling.

As people grow older, move out of their parents' house, and become independent adults, the notion of borrowing things from their siblings changes quite a bit. One can't really let themselves into their siblings' home and take clothes out of their closet anymore; it doesn't really work once you both have your own separate lives. Still, if you find yourself in need of something you know your sibling can provide, you might turn to them and ask for a favor, and they might supply.

When it comes to borrowing money, however, the sibling dynamic might not be the same as when you were children. Depending on how much money you ask of your sibling, their answer can vary from 'sure', 'it depends', or 'absolutely not'. It usually depends on how close you are in your adulthood, and how much trust has been built between the two of you all these years.

Take the sisters in the story below as an example. They both grew up poor and never really built their relationship on trust. They also have unreliable parents who were always bad with money. The younger sister managed to break that cycle and reach financial stability, while the older one followed her parents' footsteps.

Now, when both sisters are grown adults, the older sister has turned to the younger and asked for a loan to help her start a business. The younger sister knew that her sibling could not really be trusted to pay the money back unprompted, so she agreed to loan the money only if they both signed a contract. However, this only insulted the older sister, who claimed that real sisters trust each other and don't need legal documents to do each other favors.

What would you have done if your sibling asked you for a significant loan? Would you have agreed with no terms, or do you also think a contract might be necessary?

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut Bar Mor Hazut
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