College student refuses to keep sharing her location with parents after they stop paying her tuition, they tell her she is no longer welcome at their house: ‘I'm paying for my own life now’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Jan 20, 2026 3:00 PM EST

Even when your kids become fully grown adults, you always want to know that they are safe.

The only problem is, you can't know that at all times. Try as you might, you can't monitor your kids 24/7, and you can't follow their every step once they climb out into the real world. 

Technically, you can definitely try, but your kids will probably not like it. While they live under your roof, you can use that as an excuse to want to know where they are and what they are up to. Once they leave, they get to make their own decision and have the freedom to do so without your constant involvement. There are definitely parents out there who still refuse to accept that their children deserve their independence, and they would do anything to keep a certain hold on it while they can. Some parents do that by allowing their kids to keep living at home even after college, or by offering a much-needed financial support. They use their help as leverage for their involvement in their kids' adult lives.

Take the parents in the story below as an example. They offered to pay for their daughter's college tuition and housing, and in return, she had to install an app on her phone that shares her location with them at all times. While their daughter didn't love this arrangement, she felt like it was a fair deal.

Over the holidays, the daughter and her dad got into an argument regarding her major. This led the parents to stop giving the college student any money, and she had to start working two jobs and take student loans to afford school. Since she was no longer getting anything from her parents, the daughter didn't find any reason to keep the location-sharing app on her phone, so she deleted it while she went on a roadtrip to another state.

When her parents noticed they could no longer see where she was at all times, they completely lost it. They claimed it was unsafe, demanded she reinstall the app, and even told her she was not welcome to Thanksgiving if she refused.

Should the daughter give in to her parents' demand, or does she deserve her privacy after everything? Keep scrolling to read the full story…

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  • Young Female Traveler in Lào Cai Vietnam
    via Son Hoa Nguyen

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITA for refusing to give my parents my location after they stopped paying for my tuition?

    I [19F] am a sophomore in college. Until last semester my parents were paying for about 3/4 of my tuition and my housing.
    via amelia_larsen
  • However they insisted I used the Life360 app showing my location to them at all times.
    via amelia_larsen
  • It wasnt optimal but I figured its up to them since theyre paying for me. Over the holidays however my dad and I had a huge argument because I changed my major from Biology to Nursing.
    via amelia_larsen
  • He told me I was throwing away a bigger opportunity but I feel like i can help more people this way.
    via amelia_larsen
  • Since then Ive had to start working two jobs and take out multiple student loans. I pay for everything now, my parents give me $0.
    via amelia_larsen
  • Anyways, last weekend I went on a roadtrip to another state and my mom started texting me non stop, demanding to know why i was in another state.
    via amelia_larsen
  • I had forgotten about the tracking app at this point. I realised thats how they knew and I just deleted the app.
    via amelia_larsen
  • Then came the calls from both my parents, both of them saying how dangerous it is for me to not be tracked by them all the time.
    via amelia_larsen
  • I told them Im paying for my own life now, i value my privacy and I dont feel comfortable with the app.
    via amelia_larsen
  • This has really infuriated my dad and upset my mom because she thinks Im trying to cut them off completely or something.
    via amelia_larsen
  • They said if I dont turn it back on, that Im not welcome at Thanksgiving this year.
    via amelia_larsen
  • AITA?
    via amelia_larsen
  • sharing smart location on a smart phone
    via leo dadyo pamungkas

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Omnomfish >This has really infuriated and dad and upset my mom because she thinks Im trying to cut them off completely or something. >They said if dont turn it back on, that Im not welcome at Thanksgiving this year. You aren't the one cutting them off. NTA
    via Omnomfish
  • jimrynne 1st they cut off their 19 year old child, and now they are complaining that their child has cut off her relationship with parents. What a load of crap. NTA. They think they own you
    via jimrynne
  • Truebeliever-14 NTA - Your change of major makes sense and your parents are very shortsighted. There are way more job opportunities for a nurse in and out of a hospital setting than there are for biology majors. Thanksgiving is almost a year away, I'm sure a friend will invite you to celebrate with their family.
    via Truebeliever-14
  • Angrychristmassgnome "We're afraid you're trying to cut us off! But you're not welcome at holidays if you don't do exactly as we demand" Good lord, the selfsabotage is strong in these ones. (NTA obviously and if you don't want to be under their thumb forever you should probably call their maybe-bluff)
    via Angrychristmassgnome
  • Stunning Patience_78 Your dad is mad at you for switching to an employable major from one that was likely unemployable? That is wild. You're 19. This is your call. NTA
    via Stunning_Patience_78
  • Batgirl_1984 They don't care about safety, they care about control. Bummer about Thanksgiving, but you'll be alright. NTA
    via Batgirl_1984
  • Straight_Coconut_317 Don't turn it on and don't go for Thanksgiving. They are trying to retain control of your life and you are trying to become a fully independent adult. You're paying your own way. You don't have to put up with this. Have Thanksgiving with friends.
    via Straight_Coconut_317
  • Murmurmira Lmao your parents are hilarious pushing you away in order to get you to come closer. That's not how this works. Keep your location off and skip Thanksgiving. Nta
    via Murmurmira
  • redelectro7 I mean if they're saying you can't come to thanksgiving if you keep it turned off, they don't actually care about your safety or you cutting them off. It's wild to be like 'we don't want you to cut us off, do what we say or you can't come to thanksgiving'.
    via redelectro7

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tracking family drama tuition aita major kids mother parenting family college college student parents children Father
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