Wife cheats on her husband, demands her husband let her stay friends with her affair partner because he is the Dungeon Master of her Dungeons & Dragons group: 'Therapy has now shifted into separation.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Feb 4, 2026 11:00 AM EST

She would rather chase after her affair partner than save her marriage.

You don't get to have your cake and eat it too when it comes to affairs. If you have an affair, you don't get to go back to your normal life as if nothing happened, and maintain a close friendship with your affair partner. You either have to choose your life partner or your affair partner, even if you feel like you don't have to. The whole reason people have affairs is that they want to see someone new without losing the security of the person they've been with for years. It's no wonder people who cheat want to have it all, even after their misdeeds are found out.

Cheating is always going to get found out eventually, because you can only live a life of lies and deception for so long. Nobody has ever had a secret family that was not eventually discovered by the other family, even if it is posthumously. If you want to put in the very hard work of trying to rebuild your relationship after infidelity takes place, you're going to need to change a whole heck of a lot about your day-to-day life. If you've been cheating on someone in your rec basketball league, you might need to quit playing basketball in order to save your marriage. If you're not willing to quit basketball to save your marriage, then your marriage was probably never worth saving to begin with. 

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  • A man and a woman playing Dungeons and Dragons
    via 2H Media

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The husband-and-wife duo in this story needs to break up because the wife, who cheated, insists that her affair partner stay in her life because he is the Dungeon Master for her Dungeons & Dragons group. If that's not choosing your affair over your marriage, I don't know what is.

  • Am I wrong for wanting a divorce after my wife insists on keeping her affair partner in our life so he can DM her Dungeons & Dragons sessions?

    I have been married to my wife for 15 years. Last year she initiated an affair with a long time friend who was running her DnD sessions (for the sake of this post we will call him Dan) I had a lot of trust issues surrounding this guy for some time starting when he and my wife were both fired for sexually harrasing an employee which effectively ended my wifes career.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • When I discovered the affair they went no contact for awhile. Me and my wife went into therapy and have been trying to rebuild our life for a year.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • In our last therapy session she has insisted that this man must stay in her life as a friend and that they would never cross that line again especially because they are playing DnD with a crowd.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • A person holding Dungeons & Dragons cards
    via Daniel Andrews

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I can't trust that this would be the case so therapy has now shifted into separation.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • We have two children, one with special needs, and she and her circle believe I am likely clinically insane for wanting to seperate over what they think is a bunch of people just playing DnD.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • AITAH here because I strongly feel like I am being gaslit a little here.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • Justanotherthrow4way IANAL but I highly suggest you don't do this. It's not going to look good in front of a judge handling your divorce. Just get a lawyer, get a divorce and you can both move on. Your wife sucks and clearly doesn't want to be together anymore.
    via u/Justanotherthrow4way
  • throwaway1986iii Original Poster's Reply Honestly that is a very solid point thanks. I don't know if it falls under harrasment
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • beaglerules Does her circle know about the affair? If they do not, she needs to tell them. If they do, then she needs to get rid of that circle of friends if she wants to stay married to you. They are not friends of your relationship with her. Either way, NTA and your wife is still in affair fog and has limerance for the affair partner.
    via u/beaglerules
  • throwaway1986iii Original Poster's Reply I am posting this thread in their discord in about 1 hour.
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • Dealer Alarmed3632 I cannot believe that your therapist would let your wife insist this. NTA.
    via u/DealerAlarmed3632
  • throwaway1986iii Original Poster's Reply She didn't, this is what began "OK so what would seperation for you both look like."
    via u/throwaway1986iii
  • Minimal portrait of confident mature businesswoman looking at camera while wearing pink shirt
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • jonjon234567 She isn't taking a basic and obvious step to try and help you recover from the pain she caused to you and your family. She isn't serious about changing. I don't think you could have believed anything she said or did before, but you definitely can't now.
    via u/jonjon234567
  • Available-Algae-3034 Umm wtf. YTA to yourself at this point. Your wife isn't a good person. Her and her affair partner harassed another person at work and got fired for it? This is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
    via u/Available-Algae-3034
  • kreeferin My dude, I'm sorry this is happening to you. But your wife just told you that a role playing game is more important to her than your marriage. It's time to see yourself out. NTA.
    via u/kreeferin

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fired affair therapy friends wife dungeon master husband divorce parents dungeons and dragons
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