Aunt and uncle take 9-year-old niece to Disney World, refuse to take her 12-year-old sister: 'We simply cannot afford to take all of them.'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Feb 23, 2026 8:00 PM EST

They should either take their daughter alone or both of their nieces. Taking one niece but not the other is just plain wrong. 

There are life circumstances where parents let one kid travel while the other stays at home. If their daughter has a dance competition across the country, it's going to be a lot more convenient for mom to travel with their daughter while dad stays at home with their son. There's a chance their son might be sad that his sister gets to go on a plane and he doesn't, but it's much more likely that he'd be relieved he doesn't have to sit through hours of tap, jazz, and ballet. They might also let one go on a school trip while the other stays home, but there's a good chance the 8th-grade trip to Washington, D.C., will still be around by the time their 6th grader gets to 8th grade. It's not like the younger sibling is getting excluded from some once-in-a-lifetime vacation that they'll never get to experience, nor are they losing out on valuable family time. 

It's a good rule of thumb never to exclude a child from a vacation that their sibling gets to go on. If they're a baby that won't remember it, that's fine, but if grandma and grandpa go to the beach with their 7-year-old grandson and not their 5-year-old granddaughter, she will probably be a little resentful of that for the rest of her life. 

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  • A crowd of people standing in front of the Disney World castle
    via Jeremy Huang

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The 12-year-old girl in this story is old enough to feel hurt by being excluded from a family trip to Disney World with her aunt, uncle, cousin, and 9-year-old sister. The aunt and uncle claim they can't afford to take more than one extra family member on the trip. If that's the case, they should've only taken the three of them.

  • Am I the bad guy for only taking one niece to Disney and not all of them?

    I (27F) and my husband (30M) have two kids: a 4- year-old daughter (turning 5 soon) and a 1-year-old son.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • For our daughter's 5th birthday, we surprised her with a trip to Disney. She was over the moon when we told her.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • We decided not to bring our 1-year-old because we want this to be special one-on- one time for her, and realistically, traveling with a fussy toddler would make it harder for her to fully enjoy the trip.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Woman carrying a toddler girl wearing Mickey Mouse ears at Disney World
    via Amy Humphries

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • My parents happily agreed to keep our son at their house while we're gone. When we told our daughter about the trip, we also told her we could afford to bring one other person.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • We thought it would be nice for her to have a cousin close to her age to share the experience with.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • On my husband's side, he has siblings with kids: • His sister has two daughters (12 and 9).
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • • His brother has a son the same age as our daughter and a newborn daughter.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • All the nieces and nephews adore us and call me "Auntie," even before I married into the family.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • I truly have no issues with any of them going. We let our daughter choose who she wanted to invite, and she picked her 9- year-old cousin (I'll call her Stella).
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Stella's mom (my sister-in-law) thought it was incredibly sweet and has no problem with Stella going alone.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Cute little girl with a flower in her hair
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The issue is with some extended family members on my husband's side. They think it's unfair that we're only taking Stella and not the other cousins.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • The thing is, we simply cannot afford to take all of them. We also wanted someone close enough in age to our daughter to make it fun and balanced.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • For context, this is the same extended family that has previously shamed me for formula feeding both of my kids instead of breastfeeding, calling. me a bad mom for it.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • So there's already some tension there. My husband, his siblings, and even my in-laws are all on my side.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • My husband thinks we should cut ties with the extended family altogether because of how they've treated me.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • But I can't help feeling like maybe they're right this time and that I'm being unfair to the other nieces and nephew.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • So... AITA for only taking one niece to Disney and not all of them?
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Gnomer81 NTA. If they want to pay for all the kids to go, let them pay for all the kids to go on a Disney trip. But that still doesn't mean it has to be THIS trip for your daughter's birthday. Listen, I am queen of making things fair and not leaving kids out. But you are already leaving a child of your own behind to focus on the birthday girl. You are keeping it small to make it affordable. If it's not affordable it won't happen. Enjoy the day with your daughter and don't worry about what they s
    via u/Gnomer81
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply Yeah, that makes sense. I didn't want to bring a fussy 1 year old to Disney when he would not even remember the trip anyway. Lately, we have had to focus a bit more attention on our son because he is a baby, and I really want this to be something special just for our daughter. She is going to love having all of our attention for once. I also thought it would be nice for her to bring someone her own age so she could fully enjoy it without feeling like it is ju
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • PristineEvidence1567 I wish people would stop trying to invite themselves on other people's vacations. It's gross.
    via u/PristineEvidence1567
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply It does make sense why they are upset, her other nieces and nephews might feel left out.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Only Sweet1048 Would a 5yr old and a 9 yr old like the same stuff? Just asking.
    via u/Only_Sweet1048
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply She watched my daughter grow up, and they love the same movie (K-pop demon hunters), I feel like 4 years is a normal close cousin age gap.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • misses_unicorn I don't think this is a le territory (so to speak) as your motives were 100% innocent - you simply wanted to give your daughter the best birthday you possibly could. That being said I do agree to offer the opportunity to only one other child of the family is just unfair. If you can't afford to take them all you shouldn't take any of them. Just my 2 cents as a random internet stranger :)
    via u/misses_unicorn
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply My daughters best friend is that cousin, I feel like every kid has a favorite cousin, she doesn't have school friends yet, we think she's going to make her friends in elementary school when she starts kindergarten.
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Gullible_Bar_7019 NTA thanks any extended family member that feel entilted to your money for paying for the others nephews&nieces disney trip, watch them backtrack fast
    via u/Gullible_Bar_7019
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply Thanks for the reassurance, though I do feel bad I can't take the others. I just can't afford to have 4 kids at Disney, it adds up lol!
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • DrPossumlady How are you two supposed to watch four kids of varying interests and ages at a place like Disney? You would be so stressed and not enjoy your daughter's birthday trip at all.
    via u/DrPossumlady
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply It takes a village to even watch two kids, but my daughter is happy that her cousin gets to go!
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • Overall-Yesterday572 Cut ties with people who really don't matter. Take your daughter and her choice cousin. "It's easy to complain about non of your business."
    via u/Overall-Yesterday572
  • ThrowRa1790_ Original Poster's Reply My husband did say that it would be hard since one of the family members bashing me, is his paternal grandmother and grandfather, but ultimately he is on my side!
    via u/ThrowRa1790_
  • notmenotwhenitsyou i was skeptical about the choosing of one of the cousins but the MOM saying it was sweet and completely fine with the choice of one of her kids is what solidified that you are NTA. had SHE been huffish then i could see the problem but the fact its literally those who dont matter in this scenario...well thats a them problem. just because you're family, doesnt mean everyone needs to get along and do things with each other. she chose who she liked the best. thats that. theres not
    via u/notmenotwhenitsyou
  • No-Albatross-7984 NTA. It's your trip and you get ito choose who you bring along. But since this is a frequent theme in the sub, lemme tell you. I was about 9 when my grandparents took my cousin to Tenerife with them. Even then, I understood life. isn't fair and I can't have everything. But from that moment on, I knew my place. I wasn't angry or resentful. But I had clear as day evidence that if grandma had to choose, she would not choose me. As a 40+ woman now, I would never do this to siblings
    via u/No-Albatross-7984

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disney toddler birthday sisters siblings niece parenting aunt uncle daughter vacation
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