35+ of the Freshest and Funniest Tweets of the Week

Fresh tweets don't come from just anywhere.

Good tweets don't just fall out of the sky. They are made. You know this if you've ever had an idea for a tweet. Maybe the perfect idea flies into your head at the right time, and you just know you have to tweet it. Twitter is a great place to put all of your first ideas. They don't take long to do, and you'll get instant feedback on them. If you're trying out a new joke, it can be a great place to do it. Then you can take it to your friends, knowing that it will really crush. Or it will completely flop because they saw it on your Twitter and they think it's really embarrassing that you're trying to pass off your tweet as an original idea in the moment. But you can't help the fact that you like to know that you were material is good before you do it on the road. It's why so many stand-up comedians find success on Twitter. What is Twitter? If not just an outlet for stand-up jokes? But you don't get the added textures of intonation and rhythm, so you have to get it all across in words. Which makes for an interesting challenge. The right tweet with the wrong delivery will get you nowhere. You have to make sure your format, matches the intention, or everything will start to crumble. But when you get it, right, it hits so hard. We hope these tweets will do just that for you.

01
Hold up, we're on to something here.

via nabla_theta
02
Sometimes a compliment ends up hurting your feelings.

via waystarroyhoe
03
But I'm not eating those once a day. I'm taking them all down rn.

via poisonjr
04
The customer will find you when you least expect it.

via audiohymn
05
How about we provide some options in the middle?

via missmayn
06
You know you're in for it when this happens.

via _Gottalovezik
07
It's all in the timing.

via Hyeyunie
08
Tell me why I started craving it the second I saw it.

via foreverimbetter
09
Just a regular tuesday for a girl mom.

via iky_fwjett
10
We need the council to set us straight.

via RealOxfordComma
11

via femiiiszn
12

via RoRoFli
13

via bestestname
14

via jeffisrael25
15

via itsme_urstruly
16

via MissSassbox
17

via tufdave
18

via confusionm8trix
19

via PubWanghaf
20

via SAMGREIS
21

via NeilNevins
22

via MerriamWebster
23

via bennynotblanco
24

via iky_fwjett
25

via walkeri141
26

via fwtimini
27

via Jayyakamii
28

via DeeMagicGurl
29

via columbuslibrary
30

via metroadlib
31

via omgsidewalks
32

via MetamateDaz
33

via mizzoulippey
34

via his4Everz
35

via lynk0x
36

via htownrocket78
37

via ThePunnyWorld
38

via Emarged
39

via NickZararis