Woman works two jobs and 60-plus-hour weeks, refuses to feel bad for sleeping in on weekends after her sister keeps showing up unannounced and getting mad at her

Author image for Etai Eshet
Etai Eshet • Editor
Apr 29, 2026 11:45 AM EDT

A woman working two jobs and 60-hour workweeks is apparently expected to be awake and door-ready on Saturday mornings just in case her sister decides to stop by.

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  • Working 60-plus hours a week across two jobs leaves a person with a pretty short list of things they actually need, and near the top of that list is the ability to sleep until their body is done sleeping on the one day nobody is expecting them anywhere. That's not a luxury or a personality flaw. That's just basic math.

  • Woman sitting in bed with sleep mask and white blankets, looking tired after waking up.
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    Woman sitting in bed with a sleep mask on her head, wrapped in white blankets.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITAH for not waking up and not opening the door when my sister shows up unannounced

    For context, I work 5 days a week, usually 12-hour shifts (7 a.m. to 7 p.m.), and I actually have 2 jobs. During the week, I barely have time for anything
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  • because after work I still have to make my lunch for the next day and take care of normal life stuff.
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  • Because of that, weekends are basically my only chance to rest. I'm also very much a night owl, not a morning person at all, and when I finally get to sleep in, I sleep deeply.
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  • On weekends, I usually don't set an alarm because it's my only chance to rest naturally.
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  • This has honestly been a source of conflict for years between my dad, my sister, and me, because they feel like I "sleep too much," while I feel like I'm just trying to recover from my work week.
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  • Woman sitting up in bed adjusts her sleep mask beside a large window with snowy trees outside.
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    Woman waking up in bed adjusts sleep mask near window with forest view outside.

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  • Recently, my sister started having an errand every Saturday where she drops off my nephew for a few hours, and she ends up free from around 10:30 a.m. to 4 p.m.
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  • Sometimes she wants to come over during that time, and most of the time I say yes. I honestly don't think I've ever told her no.
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  • About 3 weeks ago, she came over without telling me first. She waited outside my house for maybe 15-30 minutes, calling and texting me, but I
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  • was fully asleep and didn't hear anything. I'm not exaggerating-I woke up naturally later because I had to go to the bathroom and saw all the missed calls.
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  • Too much sleep as criticism is a classic move from people who have never personally had to recover from a week like that. It sounds like concern but it's really just discomfort with someone else's schedule not matching yours. If the person doing the sleeping is working 12-hour shifts five days a week and still managing to show up every time they're actually asked, the sleeping in on Saturday is not the problem behavior in this situation.

  • Woman sleeping in bed with pink sleep mask and white blankets during restful night sleep.
    via Dmitry Ganin

    Woman wearing a sleep mask sleeps peacefully under white blankets in bed.

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I immediately called her and apologized, telling her to come back because I had genuinely been asleep. She
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  • said no, that she wasn't coming back, but that I could go to her house if I wanted. So I did, and I thought everything was fine.
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  • Showing up unannounced and then getting mad that nobody answered the door is its own category of entitlement. It requires genuinely believing that the other person's home and time are just kind of available on demand, and that their failure to materialize at the door within 30 minutes is some kind of personal slight. Waiting outside and calling repeatedly doesn't become more reasonable the longer it goes on. It just becomes more awkward for everyone once the door finally opens.

  • The next week, we planned to get together on Sunday for lunch. To me, "lunch" means like 2 or 3 p.m. But she had
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  • gone to the zoo with my nephew, and when they left around 11 a.m., she called asking if she could just come over right then since she was already nearby.
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  • The part that really stands out here is that the sister knows. This isn't new information about this person's sleep schedule that was recently introduced. It's been a documented source of family conflict for years. Deciding to wait outside anyway and then escalating to silent treatment when it doesn't work out is not a reasonable response to a situation you essentially created with full knowledge of how it was likely to go.

  • I told her it was too early and asked if I could sleep a little longer. Later, when I was more
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  • awake, I called her and apologized and asked if I could come over instead, and she said okay.
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  • Then this weekend, she texted me saying she didn't want to be alone and that she was going to wait outside my
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  • house until I woke up. She kept calling me for like 20-30 minutes, but my phone had literally fallen under my bed, so I didn't hear it.
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  • When I finally woke up about an hour later, I saw everything and immediately started texting and calling her, apologizing and asking her to answer. She ignored me and now she's mad.
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  • I feel bad, but at the same time... she knows I sleep late on weekends. She knows this has been a thing for years. I
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  • feel like if she decides to show up unannounced (or way earlier than expected), knowing there's a real chance I won't wake up, it's unfair to get angry at me for it.
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  • Apologizing immediately every single time, offering to come over instead, actively trying to make it work even after being woken up, that's not the behavior of someone who doesn't care about the relationship. That's someone who keeps meeting people halfway while those people are already standing at her front door at 10am on a Saturday expecting the other half to be delivered in real time.

  • It's not like I'm ignoring her on purpose. So... AITA?
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Tags

siblings weekend family sister entitled people
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