Bride-to-be asks her best friend of 17 years to be a bridesmaid, tells her it will cost $4700 and gets offended when the friend can't afford it: ‘[I do not] want to spend the next year managing other people’s limitations’

Is there a middle ground between getting the wedding of your dreams and ripping off your best friends? 

All future brides have a very clear idea of what they want their wedding to look like. The dress, the flowers, the decorations, the ceremony, the bachelorette party, and I could go on. It's a very special moment in every bride's life. But if they dream of the white wedding in a garden, or on a beach, or wherever, it's a whole event to prepare for months. And it can take a lot of money to plan. 

Redditor u/West-Environment3462 unintentionally discovered the cost of a dream wedding. Her best friend of 17 years got engaged and asked her to be a bridesmaid. Then, she sent a spreadsheet with everything she would have to buy and pay for: dress, shoes, bachelorette pajamas, gifts, and so on. The total amount was about 4700$. That's a loooot of money for a single person to spend on somebody else. This friend actually can't afford all that, just a few things- because she has to pay rent, student loans, and car repairs. The so-called bestie said that money was a part of showing up for her. What a manipulative little excuse of a friend. 

I've been a bridesmaid twice, and soon I'll be one again. Not one of those times did any of my friends ask me to spend an awful lot of money on exaggerated items. All they ever asked me and the rest of the wedding party was to be there for them and help in any way we could. We helped with the flower arrangements, centerpieces, decorating the salon, and making the cakes. Bachelorette? A day of home spa with the girls. Dresses? Wear what you feel comfortable and pretty in. 

I know in some places it is customary to go all out for a wedding reception, and we're not going to judge anyone. However, the whole point of getting married is to share your life with someone you love, and the party is to share that happiness with your closest friends and family. No one should be obligated to go out of their way to cater to your whims. And all friends have equal rights to share your happy day, even if they are not of equal means.