‘What completely superficial thing makes you not want to be friends with someone?’: Frivolous or irrational reasons that are a deal breaker for a friendship

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Olivia Arocena • Writer and Editor
Aug 17, 2026 6:35 PM EDT

Sometimes our gut says no to a friendship, and there's nothing we can do about it

We have to accept it, sometimes, we have oddly specific things that we consider deal breakers that not only are way too niche, but are also a bit frivolous. I'm not sure if everyone has these standards or just these people on Reddit, but of course they have the right to hold them.

I was a bit surprised to hear that minor things that are fixable or have nothing to do whatsoever with the personality traits of the person who has them can be used as reasons to end a friendship, but well, to each their own, right?.

I was trying to think of one frivolous limit that I have, but I can't think of any. Do I have poor boundaries, or are these people way too superficial? Of course, playing the victim too much or complaining about everything would be attitudes I am not willing to accept, but those are not superficial traits, unlike the one quoted about bad breath.

I get that some limits are irrational, and it's not all right to force them; as long as you are not hurting someone and are just using your free will, it's all right to pick and choose who gets to be your friend.

Do you have one of these aversions? Or do you have one that is unlisted here?

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  • How annoying can someone be?

    annoyed couple
    via Fotos

    The annoyed friend

    Representative only

  • What completely superficial thing makes you not want to be friends with someone?

    For me, it's things like bad breath or people who are frequently coughing. I know it sounds really superficial, and I honestly
    via lospiesdejavi
  • feel a bit guilty about it because it has nothing to do with who they are as a person. But for some reason, I have a very strong physical reaction to it. I immediately
    via lospiesdejavi
  • feel uncomfortable, tense, and almost instinctively want to distance myself. Even if someone is incredibly kind, funny, and interesting, with tons of great qualities, if they
    via lospiesdejavi

  • Bad breath is evil

    woman covering her mouth with hand
    via Vitaly Gariev

    Bad breath personified

    Individual pictured is a model used for illustrative purposes

  • regularly have bad breath or keep coughing, I just can't seem to relax enough around them to form a friendship. I'm wondering if anyone
    via lospiesdejavi
  • else has something similarly superficial or irrational that causes an instant "nope" reaction for them.
    via lospiesdejavi
  • TheArtistFatigue Constant complainers.
    via TheArtistFatigue

  • Yet another complaint

    woman complaining
    via Vitaly Gariev

    Person 'constantly complaining'

    Model representation

  • FinePointSharpie People that chew with their mouths open or have poor manners.
    via FinePointSharpie
  • Squirrel-Dad People who can't put their phone down during conversation
    via Squirrel-Dad

  • I’m starting to get a little paranoid; I’m sure there are people out there who can’t be friends with someone they consider ‘ugly’, lol. Should that even be a criterion? What is friendship even about in the end? Someone to look good next to in a picture?

    I don’t know about you, but my friends are very eclectic: some dress really weirdly, some are put together, some are very rigid, some are playful, some are intellectuals, and others aren’t, but maybe that’s just me…

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friendship relationship advice friends relationships entitled people karma entitled r-entitled toxic relationship relationship drama entitled people
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