Friends Exclude Woman From Plans Because She Talks Through Movies, She Flips Out When They Tell Her the Truth

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Sep 14, 2026 4:30 PM EDT

Would you be friends with someone who talked through a movie?

Talking through a movie is a huge sin if you ask me. Unless the circumstances are very specific (ex., you're at home with a close friend and neither of you really cares about what you're watching/have seen it before), then you shouldn't be talking through a movie. Certainly not a play. The actors onstage can hear you, by the way. Watching something at the cinema is an opportunity to have a deep experience with the art. You're disrupting that for yourself and others by talking through it. Everyone has different opinions on this, though, and some folks just can't keep it to themselves. They have something to say, and they want everyone else to know it. 

The woman in this story was this kind of person who just couldn't help but talk through the movie. They had a running commentary in their heads, and they wanted to share it with the people around them. This isn't always the smartest thing to do, though, if you want to make new friends. You never know how someone is going to react to your behavior. You shouldn't change yourself for everyone you meet, but you shouldn't expect that everyone you meet is going to accept your behavior. Not everyone is going to like you, and that is okay. 

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  • A man and a woman sit next to each other in a movie theater
    via Pablo Merchán Montes For Unsplash+

    Image shown for illustrative purposes; person depicted is a model.

    A man and a woman sit next to each other in a movie theater

  • Am I in the wrong for telling a friend why we don't invite her out anymore?

    A few months ago a new girl started tagging along with my friend group (Mia 32F). She's a nice enough person so we all didn't have a problem with it at first. Then we decided to watch a movie together. And Mia talked through the entire thing. She kept a running commentary going through the whole movie. She
    via littleredbird1991
  • would mention plot holes, trivia about the actors, just general nonsense. We were watching the movie on streaming at someone's house so it was annoying but we all got over it.
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  • Then we went to see the Odysee in IMAX. And she kept whispering to me the entire movie. Like a full on running commentary about every little difference there was between the poem and the movie, fun facts about Matt Damon, basically didn't shut up the entire movie. I had been sitting next to her and I asked her to be quiet a few times but she didn't seem to get the message.
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  • A few weeks later a friend said he got tickets to see "Something Rotten" which is a musical. Someone else said "don't invite Mia". So we created a second group chat without Mia to coordinate that show. We went without Mia and had a good time.
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  • The next time we were going to do a movie night at someone's home, we again didn't invite Mia. We invited her to a boating day we did so it wasn't like we were excluding her from everything.
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  • Last week the non- Mia group chat decided to go see Rock of Ages at the theater where I work and asked if I could get them a deal on tickets. Mia apparently found out about this get together and called me to ask why we hadn't invited her.
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  • I decided to be blunt and told her "because you won't shut up when we're watching stuff". Mia seemed to get offended and apparently went to the rest of my friend group to get the truth. Some told her straight up why and others either left her on read or lied about the plans.
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  • Now my friend group is divided. Some think it was right to tell Mia the truth, while others think that we should have lied to spare her feelings. Nobody wants to invite her to the show (which they are coming to tonight without Mia) though. So AITA?
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  • A man turns to a woman in a movie theater row
    via Pablo Merchán Montes For Unsplash+

    Stock photo unrelated.


    A man turns to a woman in a movie theater row

  • The friend group in this story went about this conflict in an interesting way, though. Instead of confronting her about her behavior, they just stopped inviting her to things. And then when she started to figure it out, the ensuing conflict put a divide in the friend group. Is it better to inform people just how you find them annoying, or should you keep them in the dark forever? It's nice to tell the truth, but it can also alienate people. This is a tough line to walk, and we should walk it carefully. That's what the person who posted this story thought, but they weren't sure if they were in the right. Keep reading for more.

  • Commenters gave their opinions on this story.

    Vicky-Momm You did her a favor, although you could have put it more gently. Your other friends. should tell her the truth too. Maybe if she actually realizes and corrects her behavior she can be invited again.
    via littleredbird1991
  • _DontBeAScaredy ESH - Y'all are too old for this nonsense. Someone should have had a straight up talk with Mia before cutting her out of things.
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  • GenXMom14 You are all kind of the ahle for not just telling her before you cut her off. That was mean. Of course she is upset because of how your group handled it.
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  • TolkienTeacher40 Technically speaking, nta for telling her why you didn't invite her (coulda been nicer about it), but hella the ahle for the juvenile tactics of making a "no Mia" groupchat and hiding your plans. That's not how adults function.
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  • spebesjr NTA It s ks to learn you S k so I feel for her but clearly the group was on the same page.
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  • kittycatluvrrrr As adults, we owe it to our friends to be honest with them. Your friends who lied/left her on read are cowards. While I think you could have been much kinder with how you delivered the message, it was feedback she needed to hear. NTA
    via littleredbird1991
  • KnowMan Did anyone bring this annoying habit up with her and give her the chance to correct her behavior before excluding her? If not that makes you way more TA than telling her honestly why she had been excluded after she asked.
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  • rasalscan NTA. You tried privately addressing this before and she didn't care. Sometime people don't get it until publically shamed.
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  • captainkappa173 ESH. Of course someone talking the whole time through a movie is annoying as h I so that's where she S ks. But your group could have said to her, "hey you're our friend so we want to be honest, you talk through every piece of media we try
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  • to watch and it can be frustrating for us. Please don't do it anymore!" Instead you made a separate group chat for the sole purpose of excluding her and excluded her from hanging out multiple times, which is so unbelievably hurtful, especially to someone who is newer to
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  • your group. That is where you all sk. I don't think you're an a hole for telling her directly (I do not count shushing in the moment of her doing it; she needed to be sat down and told). But I think the fact that it took you so long to tell her very directly is what s ks.
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  • Fabulous_Okra_1397 Here is my opinion as someone who has been iced out of a friend group before (with no idea why,) you did her a favor. I think that as adults, we need to learn to have adult conversations. This means sometimes being honest when it's
    via littleredbird1991
  • painful. Not telling her the truth doesn't spare her feelings, it spares yours/your friends because you don't have to feel like jerks for taking an issue with her and you get to live in ignorant bliss. Meanwhile, your friend learning the truth will sting
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  • in the beginning but hurt a lot less in the long run than feeling gaslit because they were told that nothing was wrong (even though they could feel the vibes were off.)
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  • If she's mature, she will accept the feedback and grow from it. If she doesn't accept the feedback, then that is on her. But not telling her at all doesn't even give. her the opportunity to grow or correct the mistake.
    via littleredbird1991
  • okiesotan ESH. "You talked through both movies in and out of theatres and it really k led the experience. We didn't know how to tell you how upsetting it was for us." "Because you won't shut up" isn't how an adult talks to another adult. If you work retail, you know this. C'mon now.
    via littleredbird1991

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friendship movie theater movies friends talking girlfriend etiquette
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