‘You can stand’: 18-year-old refuses to give up her train seat for entitled mom's 10-year-old daughter despite being shamed for having no respect

Author image for Cata Holmes
Cata Holmes • Writer
Oct 1, 2026 11:15 AM EDT

Would you give up your seat just because someone said you were young enough to stand?

For all of us that ever had to commute in public transportation, we know how magical it can be to find an empty seat to relax during the ride. Especially when you're commuting home and not really heading to work. So, we can understand the dilemma that this young woman had to face when a mother asked her to leave the seat for her young daughter.

Don't get me wrong: I'll leave my seat if the situation is really appropriate. When there are old people who cannot stand for long periods of time, I'll leave my spot for them. No problem at all. Now, I don't like it when an issue arises that could totally have been avoided. As for what this girl said, the train was crowded but not really packed, and there were some empty seats spread across the train.

This mother wanted the girl to leave the seat so that both of them could sit next to each other, but she refused. She had an hour-long ride and wanted to be comfortable. Who can blame her? She had been working all day, and for a commute that long, she deserves to be seated. Since there were other seats, the mom and child could have easily moved to another section of the train car and gotten over it.

But before doing that, they decided to call her names and to really try to make feel bad for not letting a little kid sit down. She told them that there were other spots available, and that it was not her fault. Another passenger intervened and asked the lady to find another seat and to quit the conflict, but she yelled at him and told him that it was none of his business.

As I said, they eventually moved to another section of the car, so this whole problem was caused by nothing. And now what could have been a relaxing train ride ended up being a stressful and super tiring one. 

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  • Young passenger waits beside a train.
    via Unsplash+ (via Polina Kuzovkova)

    Young passenger waits beside a train.

    Image depicted solely for explanatory purposes.

  • I (18F) was on a train home from work yesterday and something happened that has been bothering me ever since.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • The train was pretty crowded, but not completely packed. There were still a few people standing and most of the seats were taken.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I managed to get a seat by the window and put my bag on my lap. I had about an hour journey ahead of me, so I was pretty happy to sit down.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • A few stops later, a woman probably in her late 30s got on with her daughter. Her daughter looked around 10 or 11.
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  • They stood near where I was sitting for a couple of minutes.
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  • Then the woman looked at me and said, "Would you mind giving her your seat?"
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  • I honestly thought she was asking nicely, so I said, "Sorry, I've got quite a long way to go too."
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • She looked annoyed and said, "She's a child."
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  • I said I understood, but there were other people sitting down too and I wasn't really comfortable standing for the next hour.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • A young girl sits by a train window during a journey.
    via Unsplash+ (via Colin + Meg)

    A young girl sits by a train window during a journey.

    Representative only.

  • She then said, "You're young, you can stand."
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I didn't really know what to say to that.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I pointed out that there was another empty seat further down the train, but she said she didn't want her daughter sitting away from her.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • At this point I just put my headphones back in.
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  • A few minutes later she tapped me on the shoulder and said, "Seriously? You're going to make a little girl stand because you're too lazy?"
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I told her that I wasn't making her stand. She could sit on the empty seat if she wanted to.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • She then started saying that people my age have no respect anymore and that I should be embarrassed.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • A guy sitting across from me actually told her that she was being ridiculous and that there were plenty of adults sitting down too.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • She told him to mind his own business.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • Crowded train filled with seated and standing passengers.
    via Unsplash+ (via Dennis Siquiera)

    Crowded train filled with seated and standing passengers.

    Model portrayal.

  • Eventually she and her daughter moved further down the train.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I thought that was the end of it, but when I got off the train, I saw her again on the platform and she recognized me.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • She said, "I hope one day you have a child and someone treats you the same way."
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I just walked away.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I don't think I did anything wrong, but my friend says I could've just given up the seat because it was a kid and I was perfectly capable of standing.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I don't really agree because I was tired too and had been working all day.
    via Cultural-Mousse830
  • I also don't think being young automatically means you don't deserve a seat.
    via Cultural-Mousse830

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young woman mother seat daughter train entitled people
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