After years of being treated like she's not part of the family, woman draws the line when her sister-in-law seats her at the ‘children’s table' at her wedding: 'I'm still not family enough to sit at a table'

When does "keeping the peace" start looking a lot like accepting disrespect?

Family conflicts come in all shapes and sizes: it doesn't matter who's involved, but somehow there's always room for more problems. And especially when it's wedding season. Inside families, I've noticed that some start competing with each other to see who has the bigger wedding or who spends more money, and don't get me started on the venues and the dates.

I've noticed this exact issue with my own family: my two aunts fought to see who was getting married first, in the first week of September. That was the problem. Can you imagine? Fighting with your sister to see who is getting married that week? I can't cope with that… 

Anyway, the problem with this situation is a bit more complicated. A woman has a weird relationship with her sister-in-law, who has always disliked her. She has been dating her boyfriend for four years, and up to that point, she has excluded her in a very subtle way… When her wedding came around, she decided not to seat the woman at the front table because it was family only.

But the problem was that she didn't seat her at another family table… she sat her at the children's table with the other plus-ones, like she didn't even know her. Like another random guest. Needless to say, the woman was upset and tired of those behaviors, so she's now refusing to attend the wedding. 

I'm not going to be the person who declares who's right and who's wrong. I don't like how the sister-in-law treats her, and both of them should have a conversation like adults to see what the problem is and make peace. Also, not attending the wedding is a lot as well, and she's now putting her boyfriend in the awkward position of having to choose between the two of them.

As I said, family problems come in all shapes and sizes, and there's always some extra room for more discomfort… Luckily, this is easily fixed with some adult conversation to set the record straight.