32 Entertaining & Relatable Tweets For Your Bored Brains

Author image for Ada Elder
Ada Elder
Jul 5, 2019 4:00 PM EDT

People on Twitter never fail to amaze us. 280 characters isn't a lot, but some users astound us at being able to make jokes, showcase their stupidity, and speak our truths while remaining within Twitter's limit.

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  • 01
    The office Meme Face - carol @carolinehawk15 BOY HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND CAUSE I'LL HELP YA FIND IT
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  • 02
    Confectionery - Cwasiansnaps Don't @me Best cereal. No debate TWENTY JUAN SAVAGE @juannisaac You have to SPEED eat tf out these because you have a max of 3 minutes before they get soggy
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  • 03
    Photo caption - Me: *drops food on the floor, but picks it up in 4 seconds* The germs who were one second away from feasting: YA
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  • 04
    Text - decent pigeon @decentbirthday The owner of my AirBnB has a dog named Kevin. His human-sounding name terrified me at first. l AT&T LTE 10:15 AM 79% Completed Details I apologize in advance, but Kevin may try to sleep with you. Just keep your door shut. June 30th excuse me what June 30th addcentbithday Kevin is my dog. June 30th
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  • 05
    Product - pauline @icywiifey II "yo they lookin for u outside, i bit a kid."
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  • 06
    Text - claire @cloxic me: has never done cocaine walking through airport security: oh god what if i have cocaine in my bag 6:24 AM 6/25/19 Twitter for iPhone 25.7K Retweets 199K Likes
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  • 07
    Text - RadRojyaa @NotChrisDanao Stardew Valley SOON How I look asking people to close my door when they leave my room
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  • 08
    Text - Joel Wade @Wahday44 When I die and y'all go through my search history, you'll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn't sure I was using correctly.
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  • 09
    Text - Daddy's Digest @daddysdigest The 5 stages of whether to have a 2nd child: Denial- We don't have the energy Anger- One kid has destroyed us why ever have another Bargaining-Maybe if we get rich and can afford help Depression- They grow up so fast:( Acceptance- Screw it let's have another
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  • 10
    Text - dirt prince @pant_leg maybe millennials wouldn't spend so much money on coffee if we could produce serotonin
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  • 11
    Text - Jared Freid @jtrain56 I need a trainer who anytime l'm about to overeat, sneaks up on me with a mirror from a bad angle. 10:18 PM 6/25/19 Twitter for iPhone
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  • 12
    Text - cameron @cameronsaaige am too young to be waking up at 6 a.m. and getting home at 6 p.m. My back hurts, I want to be in bed by 7, and my eye sight is awful. 22 going 200. No one talk to me. I'm grumpy as hell.
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  • 13
    Text - ig luvlythread @luvlythread *hears a song* me: nice plays song 9573839 more times* me: still nice everyone else: please stop
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  • 14
    Text - Mr Kaplan @Winnifred Crack. Everyone involved with/in this show was on crack @Ryuuonsuke 2d Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack Show this thread The FAPJACK CRATV TRANN NSTE TN CO
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  • 15
    Text - @glowy on instagram @glowyig i stopped sending paragraphs, stopped begging, i stopped telling people how to treat me, and started walking away, blocking, and distancing myself. life may be lonely, but it's becoming peaceful. sometimes being alone in life is better than being surrounded by halfass people
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  • 16
    Text - jo$h @confused my mom yesterday: do u work tomorrow me: yes my mom today: do u work today me: yes i already told u my mom when i'm at work: where are u
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  • 17
    Text - Jared Freid @jtrain56 My least favorite influencer is the one who "gets it." They'll post one picture with a zit and be like "Not everything you see here is real but here's ME WITH A ZIT." And we're supposed to be like "Wow! Your promo codes are so much more authentic now." 3:55 PM 6/22/19 Twitter for iPhone
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  • 18
    Nose - Lorddddd Dad @YesImRhymeskeme Disney is built different Movie Details @moviedetail 4d Don Rickles passed away before he was able to record any dialogue for Toy Story 4. Rather than replacing him, Disney reviewed 25 years of material from the first 3 films, video games, and other media; they were able to assemble enough dialogue to cover the entire film.
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  • 19
    Text - Carson @CallMeCarsonYT 6h I put a blindfold on and now I can't see the tutorial on how to get a blindfold off because there's a blindfold in the way 172 6,635 tl679 CVS pharmacy @CVSpharmacy... .5h CVS That's a good one, Carson pharmacy t5 3 174 Carson @CallMeCarsonYT Replying to @CvSpharmacyUS Thank you, CVS Pharmacy
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  • 20
    Text - sarah schauer @SJSchauer Last night I was dancing with a girl and I told her I needed to pee but instead ran 2 miles home in the middle of the night by myself. Why? Cuz I was nervous and drunk me thought it was a completely normal thing to do. 8:49 PM 6/29/19 Twitter for iPhone
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  • 21
    Text - KT @katie_phenix Y'all remember in elementary school when we sent the boys to Jupiter to get more stupide... well they're back and it worked
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  • 22
    Text - Dad Wilder @dad_wilder I can tell how mad my wife is by how fast and loud she is walking. 12:41 PM 6/29/19 Twitter for iPhone J View Tweet 2ctivity
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  • 23
    Text - jack meoff @uglyincel why would anyone buy wet wipes when u can dip the toilet paper in the toilet water for fre... 14/3/19, 11:36 am 84 Retweets 354 Likes
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  • 24
    Cheezburger Image 9328164864
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    Cheezburger Image 9328165120
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    Cheezburger Image 9328165376
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  • 27
    Cheezburger Image 9328165888
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    Cheezburger Image 9328166400
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    Cheezburger Image 9328166656
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  • 30
    Cheezburger Image 9328167168
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  • 31
    Text - Josh Flanagan @JAFlanagan 3 years ago, on this day, I brought my guitar amp and Strat outside on my back patio and played the Star Spangled Banner. Near the end, my neighbor, who had never spoken to me, told me that the man in the house next to his just died and the family would like me to stop. 5:38 PM 7/4/19 Twitter for iPhone 32 Retweets 183 Likes
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  • 32
    Text - Noelle Stevenson All I need to know @Gingerhazing 1h Top reviews Mrwalker August 5, 2018 Verified Purchase Happy wife Honestly, I don't use it. But my wife orders it constantly. It must work because my wife is really beautiful. 38 people found this helpful t 165 1.7K
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Pokémon twitter the office relatable funny memes twitter memes office memes funny tweets funny
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