CheezCake

Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (October 7th, 2019)

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    Text - @jem_jemxoxo I've just convinced my mate that the inside of a cheese grater is in fact, a sick new nightclub Trippy as fuck... where is it? 16:47 Franco Trippy as fuck... where is it? Shoreditch x 16:47 Shall we go??? 16:47 Franco You Shall we go??? Yes please 16:52 Imagine being on dmt in that gaff, probably freak out 16:52 I reckon you'd have a grate time 16:54 6:55 pm 3 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - helena @freshhel obsessed with whatever tax bracket it is where Adult bathrooms are beach themed and then kids bathrooms are more specifically fish themed 3:23 am 30 Sep 2019 Twitter for iPhone 59.6K Likes 5.3K Retweets
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    Text - Anna Drezen @annadrezen I'm not saying I'm not hot, I'm just saying most women are 100% okay with their husbands being friends with me 1:22 am 3 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone 3.7K Likes 235 Retweets
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    Text - Stephanie Ortiz @Six_Pack_Mom One minute you're young & carefree, and the next, you're googling "what is a VSCO girl?" and still not understanding it 5:37 am 3 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone 618 Likes 139 Retweets
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    Text - Mave @MavenofHonor It is a truth universally acknowledged, that when you're looking at your phone next to someone who's sleeping, you will inadvertently click on a video 5:41 am 2 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone 196 Likes 24 Retweets
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    Text - Abby Heugel @AbbyHaslssues I've never wanted to know the answer to anything bad enough to ask a question at the end of a meeting that's running 15 minutes over time. 2:59 am 2 Oct 2019 Twitter Web App 195 Retweets 1.2K Likes
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    Text - Kie @KielyHealey buying a pregnancy test is just paying a late fee for your period 6:38 pm 4 Oct 2019 Twitter for Android 510 Likes 79 Retweets
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    Text - Rachel McCartney @RachelMComedy Before coffee: I want to die After coffee: Alright! Let's buy the rope 11:44 pm 30 Sep 2019 Twitter for Android 87.4K Likes 14K Retweets
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    Text - Skylar @hxrtbitch can y'all please stop getting dumb bitches pregnant. im tired of seeing "my little angle" 11:45 pm 2 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone 338.9K Likes 49.6K Retweets
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    Text - Catherine Cohen @catccohen fall is about trying to dress like a slutty old timey secretary for 2 weeks 12:39 am 27 Sep 2019 Twitter for iPhone 4.9K Likes 392 Retweets
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    Text - Shenanigans @Shenanigans_luv I'm not lazy I'm energy efficient 12:40 am 1 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone 253 Likes 81 Retweets
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    Text - pony @tigersgoroooar in the 1980's our moms were literally always on the phone with someone what tf were they always talking about, magnum p.i.? shoulder pads? 2:18 am 29 Sep 2019 Twitter for iPhone 38 Retweets 312 Likes
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    Text - Rachel Sobel @whinecheezits I've never been held hostage, but I have gotten trapped in my own sports bra while getting undressed. 9:34 pm 28 Sep 2019 Twitter for iPhone 206 Likes 47 Retweets
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    Text - Kristen Arnett @Kristen_Arnett me: i am overwhelmed, dying, too many tasks, help, what can be done, will i live this way forever after replying to one email: magnificent, what a powerful work horse, can't be stopped, time to celebrate with a beer, reward this titan of industry 6:51 pm 29 Sep 2019 Twitter Web App 5K Likes 725 Retweets
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    Text - Kristin @FeralCrone Very disappointed to learn that 'malingering' does not mean 'bad at hanging around' 10:22 pm 30 Sep 2019 Twitter for iPhone 175 Likes 29 Retweets
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    Text - Kashana @kashanacauley Every time I miss two hours of news, I fear they've committed 80,000 more crimes, pears are now taxed at 400% and we're never speaking to Hawaii again. 8:33 am 4 Oct 2019 Twitter for iPhone 315 Retweets 3.2K Likes

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