My Dating Nightmare: The Bible Beater Cheater

Jack and I met 'in the wild' while awaiting the train into the city one late August morning.

Jack ever so smoothly wiggled his way into a conversation by complimenting my leather jacket, and before I knew it we were effortlessly chatting the entire way to the Financial District.

Being a divorcee subsequent to the ending of my 11-year marriage I'd certainly had my fill of the online dating scene, so meeting Jack in a more organic fashion was delightfully refreshing.

After exchanging digits we opted to meet for some tapas and cocktails in my neighborhood.

When the evening was upon us I slipped on a gauzy summer ensemble, some casual sneakers, and touched up the bronzer on my cheeks after a long day of work.

I finally arrived to see Jack, who was donned in baggy camouflage cargo pants and a mismatching purple Lacoste polo.

Interesting choice.

Clothes don't make the man, right?

Right.

Jack and I shot the breeze about this and that quite nicely for the first 45 minutes or so of our date, and it eventually came out that I was previously married. Jack became rather curious about the matter and inquired as to why my marriage failed.

Being that my divorce wasn't exactly the kind of conversation I wanted to engage in on a first date I disclosed that he was a controlling psychopath who couldn't keep his cock in his pants we simply grew apart.

"What exactly was the breaking point? Why couldn't you work it out? Did you go to therapy? Were there issues in the bedroom?"

His interrogation was extremely judgmental and seemed to continue until I attempted a blatant change of subject.

"I'm sorry," Jack said. "The way I see it, marriage is so important to me, and the fact that you got a divorce tells me you don't really have respect for the sanctity of marriage. Were other guys you have dated OK with the fact that you were already married?"

I assured him that around 50% of the population had indeed broken their 'sacred' vows of matrimony, and no one I have dated has ever had such an issue.

" I dunno. It just kind of sucks for the next guys because it's like you've already done it with someone else, and I don't see how it would be special for anyone in the future," he shared.

"So you are essentially calling me 'damaged goods'?" I said.

"I mean, I wouldn't say you're 'damaged goods,' I just don't see how I could enter a marriage with you in the future."

…as if I would even want to go on date #2 let alone marry this mother fucker.

This statement was followed by a slightly heated debate about marriage (or lack thereof) in today's society, and how Jack also felt that 'gay marriage' should not necessarily be considered marriage, but have its own 'special' name so that the word 'marriage' could maintain its precious 'divinity.'

While waiting for his credit card to be run Jack concluded his argument by saying that he actually had two daughters, and he would be devastated if they were ever to separate from their future husbands as it would go against the teachings in the Bible and how it would be 'cheating' his faith in a sense.  

Yes. TWO daughters.

AND a son.

From THREE different women.

All out of wedlock.

*mic drop*