Kids Describing Their Parent's Jobs: Funny Twitter Thread

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satirequeen
Dec 6, 2020 4:00 PM EST

One day, I was about seven-years-old when my dad brought me home a bunch of spare stationery from his office. We're talking highlighters, sticky notes, pens, and a stapler. The next day, I went to school and told my teacher that my dad's job was a 'pen tester,' and he sat all day testing out pens to see if they work. His actual job? A marketing director. Oh, to be that blissfully naive again. The phrase 'truth from the mouth of babes' is a reality that many parents live each day. Someone Tweeted, "My friend's daughter was asked by her teacher what does her mother do for a living. Miss thing said move papers around and talk on the phone. My friend is a judge." It received thousands of likes and shares, with people responding with similar funny examples of what they think their parents do for a living. Kids really do say the darndest things!



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  • 01
    Text - Household Government @LadyBugAssassin My friend's daughter was asked by her teacher what does her mother do for a living. Miss thing said move papers around and talk on the phone. My friend is a judge. 9 11:03 PM Oct 19, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 14.8K Retweets 678 Quote Tweets 130.5K Likes >
    via @LadyBugAssassin
  • 02
    Text - rachel :/ @justshutup26 Replying to @LadyBugAssassin my mom was a phlebotomist, i used to tell people she was a hippopotamus 2:20 PM · Oct 20, 2020 - Twitter for Android 9 Retweets 210 Likes
    via @justshutup26
  • 03
    Text - C*s @theviolentthem Replying to @LadyBugAssassin My dad paints houses for a living but when my sister was younger she found out that was code for "kills people" (like the movie the Irishman) and started telling people that's what he did instead for like a year. 4:30 PM · Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 1 Retweet 18 Likes >
    via @theviolentthem
  • 04
    Text - erica nicole clark @ComicEricaClark Replying to @LadyBugAssassin I'm a teacher, asked a 2nd grader what does her mom do. She said, "my mom sells drugs. Not with a gun but she emails ppl asking if they want drugs" Her mom is a pharmaceutical rep 11:23 PM · Oct 20, 2020 - Twitter for Android 3 Retweets 29 Likes
    via @ComicEricaClark
  • 05
    Text - frank @yo_itsFrankie Replying to @LadyBugAssassin i used to work at a courthouse and we asked the kids to describe what their parents did. one said "sits in her chair all day and texts on her phone". mom handled the budgets for the whole court circuit 1:13 AM Oct 20, 2020 · Echofon 51 Retweets 977 Likes
    via @yo_itsFrankie
  • 06
    Text - Mady +. @Mady13444 Replying to @LadyBugAssassin My mom is a project manager executive for a construction company and I used to tell people as a kid that she went to construction sites and yelled at people for a living Imfao 6:18 AM Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 19 Retweets 2 Quote Tweets 645 Likes >
    via @Mady13444
  • 07
    Text - Katherine Lansky. @KatherinelLansky Replying to @LadyBugAssassin Could be worse.. for years I told people my mom was a smuggler. She was a travel writer who would bring fun things home from her trips, then (after using those things for years) sell some of them. My mom just about died when she saw THAT assignment come home. 5:59 AM Oct 24, 2020 · Twitter for Android
    via @KatherinelLansky
  • 08
    Text - CIBLE MARI Y @CibleMari YOUTUBE IN BIO Replying to @LadyBugAssassin Lol I do graphic art and have a few simple YouTube videos. My nephew thinks I'm a cool artist and TV star. 4:06 PM - Oct 20, 2020 - Twitter Web App
    via @CibleMari
  • 09
    Text - A Pony. Not A Stallion.E @ChristyCindy Replying to @LadyBugAssassin My stepson tells people his is a hitman because he wears a suit and has two phones. He's a property manager. 3:43 PM Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 2 Retweets 47 Likes >
    via @ChristyCindy
  • 10
    Text - Krishna murthy @hdydiednnd Replying to @LadyBugAssassin I used to tell people my dad digs the ground searching for stuff. He's a petroleum engineer.eeee 8:46 PM · Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for Android >
    via @hdydiednnd
  • 11
    Text - Kerith Stevens @hey_kerith Replying to @LadyBugAssassin I told my 1st grade class that my dad gave money to people who needed it and took it away from people who didn't want to give it to him. My dad was a politician. 7:46 PM Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter Web App 4 Retweets 38 Likes
    via @hey_kerith
  • 12
    Text - katie blm @katielikesmilk Replying to @LadyBugAssassin my mom used to be a real estate agent and i told my teacher she walked into stranger's houses all the time :)))) 7:25 PM Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 2 Retweets 49 Likes >
    via @katielikesmilk
  • 13
    Text - Nature box has good pineapple rings @frozen_cheetos Replying to @LadyBugAssassin My dad's a chemical engineer and when I was a kid I told people he poured toxic chemicals on people 11:40 PM · Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for Android 2 Retweets 9 Likes
    via @frozen_cheetos
  • 14
    Text - Andie Olson @AndieOlson Replying to @LadyBugAssassin I'm a stay at home mother and when my son's kindergarten teacher asked what I did for a living, my beautiful boy responded with "She's a scullery maid". 4:29 PM · Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for Android >
    via @AndieOlson
  • 15
    Text - Julie Saunders @ohmissjulie Replying to @LadyBugAssassin When I was a kid I told everyone that my dad ate popcorn for a living, because the one time I visited him at the office he gave me a bowl of popcorn and had me wait in the breakroom while he had a quick meeting. It was the only thing I remembered about his work. 8:32 PM - Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter Web App >
    via @ohmissjulie
  • 16
    Text - Olivia @oliviaannekent Replying to @LadyBugAssassin My dad worked in sales for a frozen food company and travelled a lot. I told people he was a travelling salesman who sold Italian food. People thought he was going door to door with frozen lasagna. He was not! He was going to Walmart headquarters with frozen lasagna. 7:08 PM Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for Android >
    via @oliviaannekent
  • 17
    Text - >Coco LeBrame3 @HaleySteez Replying to @LadyBugAssassin My family owns a funeral home so when people would ask what my dad does l'd say he plays with dead people and walk away e 1:23 PM Oct 20, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone <>
    via @HaleySteez

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kids say the darndest things jobs job Twitter Thread things kids say kids funny kids kids these days funny tweets funny twitter parents
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