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01
It really does not matter if you tell a toddler that you don't have any games on your smart phone. They will still run away with it, and you know it will be sticky upon return.
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02
I have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career of petting dogs. Skills that make me a nightmare for dogs like you.
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03
This one is ice cold.
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04
Nothing worse than having to locate the source of that gross cat gagging sound before too much damage is done.
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05
Dating really isn't easy these days.
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06
Sorry, Instagram friends. There's no way I'm joining your live broadcast that mostly consists of the backs of peoples heads and the odd strobe light.
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07
It helps to bring a disguise so you can load up on as many mini quiches as your heart desires.
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08
You think that's where he gets his adrenochrome?
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09
We've been doing Zoom calls for months, it shouldn't be this difficult.
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10
This one hit close to home. Remember going to clubs?
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11
Scariest five minutes of a kid's life.
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12
In one ear and then right out the other.
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13
It's all fun and games until you burn the crap out of your entire mouth.
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14
Lord help these boomers.
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15
Really taking it all in.
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16
We're waaaiting.
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17
Must be nice to be a cat.
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18
We've all been there.
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19
Next to impossible.
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