Dumb Things Women Should Charge For Which Men Don’t Have To Deal With
Most people know that women get paid less than men for doing the same work in most fields, and on March 24 there's even a national day to fight the pay gap. But, did you ever think about how there's tons more bullsh*t that women have to deal with, that goes mostly unnoticed? Little things, like getting passed over for a job for not wearing makeup (or for wearing too much). In what world does the amount of glorified paint on your face have any connection to your ability to do a job?? Well this year, I say we take Equal-Pay Day to its logical conclusion and start charging money for every dumb thing we have to deal with just for not being men. Like…
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Having our ideas stolen
How many times have you spoken up in a meeting with a great idea, been ignored, and then watched a man say EXACTLY what you said but stupider and get super validated? Well, it's time to start charging royalties, ladies! That was your idea, and you deserve at least 30% of any profits resulting from it plus an up-front fee of your choosing for the idea itself. No more stolen ideas, only BOUGHT ideas.
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Being treated as property
What's one of the few things that usually gets a man off your back in a bar? That's right, having another man come up and "claim" you as their girlfriend. From now on, gentlemen, you're gonna have to pay a collateral fee every time you wanna claim one of us as even so much as an acquaintance. We own ourselves, thank you very much.
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Being told to smile
It's simple, random men on the street. You want us to smile, you give us a reason. Specifically, cold hard cash.
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Not being harsh
Women usually have to water down any request we need to make with "sorry"s and "just"s--otherwise men think we're being aggressive and, you know, ~crazy~. Well I say if you want us to act palatable you'd better make it worth our while--$1 per softening word.
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Getting interrupted
You know what hurts a man's feelings? Getting interrupted. You know what women experience in nearly every single conversation with a man ever? Getting interrupted. Considering the sheer number of times it's happened to nearly every member of the female population, and considering the serious emotional toll it can take, I'd say we have a solid class-action lawsuit on our hands. Get ready to pay damages, boys, we're going to court!
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Using too much data
Real talk, women should have half-price phone plans. We are forced to use tons of extra data and minutes, JUST to stay safe! Whether it's sending a friend our location before a date or an Uber ride, calling someone when we're walking alone, or getting our phone blown up by entitled men who wouldn't leave us alone until they made SURE they got our real number, women don't get much choice about using our phones so much.
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Like what you see? Find more hilarious women's memes and crazy stories on our Instagram @Cheezcake_Humor and more videos on our TikTok @cheezcaked
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