CheezCake

Tweets That Perfectly Sum Up What Dating Has Been Like This Past Year

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    Font - Ali Kolbert ... @Alikolbert "Sorry l'm practicing social distancing" is about to be the most popular break up text of 2020 6:40 AM · Mar 12, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 90 Retweets 11 Quote Tweets 220 Likes

    Honestly, we have all used this excuse from time to time. Once it became okay to start seeing a few people at a time, it really just depended on the person. If somebody called you up and asked to hang, it was such an easy excuse to say, "I'm really just trying to protect my family." Even if your family lived across the country.

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    Font - Molly Tolsky @mollytolsky Pro-tip for couples suddenly working from home together: Get yourselves an imaginary coworker to blame things on. In our apartment, Cheryl keeps leaving her dirty water cups all over the place and we really don't know what to do about her. 7:14 PM Mar 16, 2020 · Twitter Web App

    Yes, imaginary friends are the way to go. Especially for the people who aren't even in a couple. If you forgot to move your clothes from the washer to the dryer, don't beat yourself up! Just blame Cheryl. She knew it was her turn and she still f***ed up. Typical Cheryl, we gotta do something about her.

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    Font - Madison Kois @MmmKois My Hinge profile has been blowing up the last few days. I guess there's a lot of dudes out there that don't want to die alone. Looks like I've gotta strike while the market's hot. 2:24 AM · Mar 10, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Font - helena ... @freshhel this is a bad time for ppl whose two coping mechanisms r Kissing and going to the store for no reason. i'll see u all on the other side.. 3:15 AM · Mar 13, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 18.7K Retweets 1,229 Quote Tweets 127.1K Likes
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    Font - Just Bill @WilliamAder "I have two-ply." - my new dating profile 2:33 AM · Mar 14, 2020 · TweetDeck 114 Retweets 3 Quote Tweets 450 Likes
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    Font - Chad Read @squirrel74wkgn [returns from long business trip] *gives wife an awkward fist bump* 1:31 AM · Mar 15, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Font - Hi, it's Abby. Yep @abbycohenwl ... Therapist: So you're sheltering in place.? Me: Yes but when I have to go out, there's always some weirdo who won't let me social distance Husband: I thought we agreed no name-calling 2:16 AM · Mar 19, 2020 · Twitter Web App
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    Font - Hannah Boone ... @boonecomedy For once l'm not crazy for getting mad when my bf doesn't text back right away- right now it's like bitch you're not busy! What're you doing, thinking about making soup? 7:34 PM · Mar 18, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Font - WendyDarling @wendchymes ... Never thought uttering the phrase "I just got a case of toilet paper" would make me someone's dream girl but here we are 10:10 PM · Mar 11, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Font - JPo @Peauxtassium ... COROX I just want a man who will remain 6 feet away from me at all times 2:09 PM · Mar 17, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 164 Retweets 2 Quote Tweets 486 Likes
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    Font - @HeSlimedMeRay I just told my husband how I wiped off his package and my box with disinfectant and yeah you already know why he immediately started giggling. 2:03 AM - Mar 17, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Font - Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix ... Trying to send my wife a text but can't find an emoji of an eggplant wearing a facemask 8:03 PM · Mar 17, 2020 · Twitter Web App 15 Retweets 1 Quote Tweet 75 Likes

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