Mom Makes Adult Daughter And Boyfriend Sleep In Separate Beds

Author image for mattstaff
mattstaff
May 23, 2021 4:00 PM EDT

This mom decided to consult the moral judges of Reddit's AITA community to see whether or not she was in the wrong for enforcing a house rule that prevented her daughter from being able to sleep in the same bed as her partner. It sounds like the daughter didn't take too kindly to this house rule. Shocker. Then the mom insists that she's being punished by her daughter for enforcing a house rule. Honestly, it seems well within her daughter's right to not want to visit the house if she's having to deal with not being able to sleep in the same bed as her partner. 

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    Font - AITA for not allowing my daughter to sleep in the same bed as her boyfriend? My daughter and her boyfriend celebrated Easter with us (me, my husband, and our son/her brother). I asked her boyfriend to stay in our guest room, as they aren't married yet and my husband and I believe it's inappropriate to share a bed before marriage. Neither her or her boyfriend said anything at the time, but later it came up that they don't visit more often because we won't "allow" them to sleep together.
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    Font - Yellowsunflowerlover · 2d When I pointed out she was still trying to punish us (who waits three months in between visits to their parents?) YTA cus this statement is so weird to me. You sound very controlling. They're adults let them sleep in the same bed. It's not that serious, she doesn't live with you anymore. G Reply 1 144 3 ...
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    Font - S 1 Award YTA. They respect your rule. They just choose not to visit often because of the rule and don't agree with it. You are choosing your rule over them visiting. G Reply 4 10.4k 3 ...
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    Font - chucker23n • 2d YTA for leaving out a critical detail in this story. You make them sound 16 and 17, and instead they're 25 and 26. If you want to have rituals over who gets to sleep together in your place, you do you, but... who waits three months in between visits to their parents? Couples who get treated like this is who. Also, daughters whose parents say "She's always been rebellious so of course we don't trust her". G Reply 569 ...
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    Font - Glimworm • 2d YTA. Your header misses the actual problem: of course it's okay that you set rules for your house. But it's not okay to blame the consequences of those rules (reduced enthusiasm for visits) on your daughter. Your interpretation that you're getting punished and that her behavior is 'unspeakably rude', stems from the assumption that you're entitled to regular visits. Truth is you aren't. She and her boyfriend are free to act as they like. G Reply 1 756 3 ...
    via u/upsetmother12
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    Organism - independentask42 · 2d YTA because they're right, it's not a reasonable rule. You can choose to enforce whatever rules you want, and they can choose not to come over because of it. She's not "punishing" you by not coming over, she just prefers to stay with in-laws who presumably respect that they're a couple and they're adults and thus can share a bed together. G Reply 1 2.0k 3 ...
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