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Divorced Woman Tells Widowed Friend She's Luckier Because Her Husband 'Flat-Out Died'

There are many different kinds of loss one can experience in their lifetime. You can lose a good friend due to a misunderstanding, or lose your temper after stubbing your toe, you can also lose your mind if both happen at the same time. Loss is a very disorienting feeling in any context. There's a lack of control in such situations, and we don't like the feeling of not being in control. Although all problems are relative, clearly there are some losses that are more permanent than others. Most people probably would agree that losing a husband due to a divorce is not the same as losing a husband due to death.

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  • 1
    Rectangle - r/AmltheAsshole u/anonwidow321 • 10h K 1 2 6 e6 3 3 1 AITA for laughing when a "friend" told me I had it easier because my husband died and her soon to be ex is dating?
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    It was Reddit user u/anonwidow321 who asked the 'Am I The A-Hole' community if she was in the wrong for flat out laughing in her 'friend's' face when she said she had it easier since her husband is actually dead and can't date around anymore... Oh boy.


  • 2
    Font - I am a widowed Mom. Little one and I recently moved to another state for a multitude of reasons. Mostly to stay close to my Inlaws, who moved to warmer temps for health reasons. I have a "mom friend". She's a neighbor. We have been doing play dates as our daughters are around the same age.
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    First, the narrator starts off by giving a little context behind her story. this is a generally new friend she's dealing with, in a new environment where she's clearly vulnerable after all she's been through. Clearly, this friend does not have the right kind of empathy that the narrator needs.


  • 3
    Smile - We get along great for the most part. She's going thru a divorce. She's the one who initiated it. All she does is complain about her husband. And how she hates being alone, etc. I listen. I'm supportive as I can be.
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  • 4
    Font - She said to me the other night that I had no idea how hard she has it. She's alone. It's better for me because my husband flat out died. He's not out there dating other women. I'll never understand how alone she feels.
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  • 5
    Human body - And... I just... LAUGHED. I couldn't help it. And I couldn't stop. I managed to mention that she initiated the divorce. She wanted to be single. But I couldn't stop laughing.
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  • 6
    Smile - So now she's mad at me. She still let's her daughter come over and play but she doesn't stay. And l'm OK with that. Because it was funny.
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  • 7
    Font - But AITA? Am I minimizing her feelings? I don't talk about my dead husband. I didn't compare my situation and hers. She did. 10.2k 481 ¡↑, Share
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  • 8
    Font - loudesttown • 9h NTA My boyfriend died several years ago and I was devastated. Some girl said to me: "Well, a break up is worse, I went through one recently and now I have to see him date other girls, you don't have to... So you don't have it so bad" I didn't laugh, but I just looked at her incredulously, like... I've never heard anything so self-centered in my life... Until I read this post. That's not your friend. Let her stay mad G Reply 850 ...
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  • 9
    Font - stevedresnor · 10h Partassipant [2] NTA. It's a bit rich when the person who initiates the divorce complains about being alone or the other party moving on. It's delusional. 6 Reply 1 2.7k 3 ...
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  • 10
    Font - Rice-Correct • 10h Asshole Enthusiast [6] NTA. What she said was incredibly naive, insensitive, and frankly ridiculous. No, you may not know how she feels, because your situation was different. She also doesn't know how YOU feel. I don't blame you for laughing. What she said was bizarre and kind of shocking in its insensitivity! It's funny because of the ridiculousness of it. I'm so sorry for your loss. G Reply 4 286 ...
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  • 11
    Font - Mimila1111 · 9h My husband was deployed and my "best" friend told me I had it much easier than she did...her husband hadn't been deployed, but war was causing him to have to work much longer hours and his stress was increasing her stress. | couldn't believe her! WTF! I chose to never speak to her again. NTA G Reply 1 1.2k 3 ...
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  • 12
    Font - diamenimed • 10h Partassipant [1] 1 Award NTA what she said was disrespectful and better you laughed than punched her in the face like someone else probably would of done G Reply 4 11.2k ...
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  • 13
    Font - probably-exhausted · 10h NTA. Her comment was appalling and quite frankly a terrible thing to say. I would have been incredibly angry if she said that to me. It's probably best that she doesn't come over anymore. I'm sorry for your loss. G Reply 1 126 3 ...

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  • 14
    Rectangle - JMLKO • 10h Supreme Court Just-ass [117] NTA if anyone should be angry it's you. What a terribly insensitive thing to say to someone who is widowed. G Reply 38 ...
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    Via u/JMLKO
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