Funniest Cases Lawyers Have Ever Ended Up Doing

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mattstaff
Jul 30, 2021 9:00 AM EDT

Lawyers spent a whole lot of time burying their brains in impossibly dense books while navigating tumultuous seas of awful stress to get themselves to a place where they occasionally end up having to work cases involving people that have lost their ways in the most absurd of ways. Maybe these ridiculous cases that lawyers ended up fielding will manage to (further) convince you that the living life of a lawyer is not the one that you want to lead. For some more absurdity from the courtroom check out this Tumblr thread about ridiculous overheards during court proceedings.

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  • 01
    Font - Levewing9854 · 13h Lawyer was verbally running through the evidence against the guy he was defending, trying to claim there wasn't enough to even call a trial. All totally fine, except he said, "I believe a more seasoned judge wouldn't have let this trial move forward." Not knowing that the judge he's speaking to gave the okay to move the trial to this court. He was immediately given a hard "motion denied." G Reply 4 151 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 02
    Font - bowcreek · 9h Cops executed a warrant in my client. GF opens the door, says he's not there. Except there's a huge pile of drywall and insulation on the floor of the hallway, and they hear someone wiggling around above the ceiling. Cops tell him they know he's up there and to come down. But rather than shimmy backward 5 feet, he just punched a new hole in the ceiling and crashed to the floor. 6 Reply 4 129 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 03
    Font - CollieFlowerCrust · 12h 3 1 Award Had a guy that thought he could impress a girl with his sword and ninja skills. He would show up at her house every few days with a sword, dressed in ninja gear. He would then go into some ninja dance, whipping that sword around, every time becoming more intimidating. She'd call the cops, he'd take off and do it all over again in a few days. Finally got caught by a random patrol car in the area. Got a suspended sentence depending upon his completion of me
    via r/AskReddit
  • 04
    Font - EmphytEdac • 13h I once attended oral arguments for US Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit. It's pretty much the big time. I watched a lawyer argue that his client received what's known as "ineffective assistance of counsel" at the trial from which she was appealing. The attorney however was not doing a very good job during oral arguments. So, at one point one of the judges on the panel leans forward and asks him "counselor, are you currently providing ineffective assistance of counse
    via r/AskReddit
  • 05
    Font - weriup · 13h Spoiled rich girl got sentenced to community service cleaning pig barns and chicken coops. After a couple days of it, she tried to argue that the stench was making her feel sick and she should at least be allowed a noseplug or gas mask or something. Judge said nope. Punishment is allowed to stink. G Reply 4 118 3 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 06
    Font - soudam_ · 3h My grandma went on the jury,and her case was something like a child had robbed like 20 monsters from a corner shop. It was only a minor case luckily,and noone got prosecuted or whatever. Probably the most useless trial ever G Reply 金24 ...
    via r/AskReddit
  • 07
    Font - Southern_Snowshoe • 1h Not my story, but one from a lawyer friend when he worked for the government defending against prisoners' lawsuits. Most of them were just nuisance suits because the prisoner was bored or angry, perhaps both. Although the suits usually went nowhere, they couldn't be outright ignored. That's where my friend came in. The best one was having to defend the government against a lawsuit for a missing jockstrap. The prisoner claimed it was lost or (ewww!) stolen from the p
    via r/AskReddit

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