Hello, it is I, an Average Man just minding my own business on this November 19th. Did you know that today is both National Men's Day AND National Toilet Day (yes, for real)? Today I got some pretty devastating news. I was hanging out with my friend Other Normal Man, and he told me this story about how his girlfriend was, uhhh...constipated and in a lot of pain. I just laughed--you know, because how can she be constipated when she doesn't use the bathroom to begin with?
My friend just stared at me, and then said those fateful words: "Average Man...you know that women DO use the bathroom, right?" I said "sure sure, to look in the mirror and stuff, I know." He gave me a VERY serious look and said, "no, my friend...women poop. Just like us. That whole thing about them not using the toilet is just a joke. Did you really not know that? How do you think they get rid of waste?" Of course, I was aghast. I immediately began the grieving process for womankind as I knew it...
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