-
01
Mr. Talks A Lot
"After we were already 15 minutes late walking into the movie because he was 45 minutes late picking me up, he proceeded to talk at normal volume throughout the entire film. After about half an hour, I got up to use the bathroom and walked right out the door."
"A couple of my friends lived four blocks from the theater, so I just walked over to their place and had them drive me home later."
-
02
Nosy For The Wrong Reasons
"He said he hoped that our kids do not have my nose."
-
03
Obsessed With The Ex
"The girl's phone vibrated, and she went, 'Oh, that's my ex. We text all the time.' She proceeded to read me the said text, wherein the ex professed jealousy that she was on a date."
-
04
Snap Snap This Man Is Wack
"He snapped his fingers at a waiter. It was so rude, and I was mortified. I left straight away before we'd even ordered a drink."
-
05
Men Who Tell You What To Wear Deserve To Wear A Forever Frown
"Within the first 15 minutes, he expressed that he wanted me to eventually wear a full burka (I already wear a headscarf) and told me that I was wearing too much makeup. I ended the date right there and then."
"To be clear, I have no problem with women CHOOSING to wear burka. I do have a problem with men who feel entitled to make a woman wear it.
-
06
Once A F*ck Boy Always A F*ck Boy
"He showed up 45 minutes late with no text or call to let me know, just as I was finishing my drink and walking out. He was on the phone with a friend, and when I went to greet him, he put his hand up in my face to shush me. I heard his friend ask, 'So did you f*ck her yet?' I loudly said, 'No, and he won't either,' as I walked out."
-
07
We're Surprised You Got A Date In The First Place
"We were on a blind date, and he said, 'I'm surprised you're so average looking.'"
-
08
Mic Drop
"I met a guy for coffee that I had been talking to online. He started acting weird within five minutes, and when I asked why, he told me that he was disappointed that my breasts looked bigger in my online picture. Then, he continued on about how important big breasts were to him. After about five minutes, I cut him off and asked how big his penis was. The answer was unimportant as I grabbed my stuff and said, 'Too small for me,' and walked out."
-
09
Science Is A Non-Negosh
"When he started talking about how the moon landing was fake."
-
10
Red Flags For Days
"We were at a club, and he kept running into attractive women that he knew but apparently had not seen in a while. I overheard him lament to a friend, 'I never see any of these ladies until I'm here with a date, then I can't do anything! Why do I have to have a date here tonight of all nights?' I had him take me back home so he could 'go back and enjoy all of the women that he never runs into.'
-
11
Old Geezer/Creep
"I was 17 and a freshman in college, while he was an extended senior. I can't remember his exact age, but it was too old, and I didn't know until I got there. He kept trying to pressure me to drink and even ordered an entire bottle of wine for the table. I kept refusing, so he ended up getting dumb drunk and very loud. He finally said, 'My friends know that I like innocent girls. That's why they set us up. Have you ever even had a boyfriend before?'
-
12
Take A Chill Pill
"He divulged to me after 10 minutes that he didn't actually live in the city I lived in and had been lying. About 45 minutes in, he said that we should be together and kept groping and kissing me like a dog with a jar of peanut butter. The cherry on top was that he told me that he loved me and wanted to marry me at the end of the evening."
-
13
When He's Secretly A Neo-Nazi
"When he took me to a World War II museum and said, 'You know, the Nazis weren't all that bad.' I was like NOPE, I'm out of here."
-
14
He Has Kids In Different Area Codes
"He said, 'I have four kids from three different women. I have cheated on all of them but something tells me that it will be different with you. Do you like kids?' I excused myself to the bathroom and ran for the hills."
-
15
They Usually Want To Get You Home Quick - This Is A New Level
"When we met up and he insisted within the hour that we go to his house, then raised up his pant leg to show me his ankle monitor."
Like what you see? Find more hilarious women's memes and crazy stories on our Instagram @Cheezcake_Humor and more videos on our YouTube Channel
Like what you see? Find more hilarious women's memes and crazy stories on our Instagram @Cheezcake_Humor and more videos on our TikTok @cheezcaked