The World Outdoes Itself and Releases the World's First "Smart Condom," a FitBit for Your Penis

Well, it's come to this a the world's first Smart Condom.

Now before you go slapping thing on your little dickie, you should know that this isn't really a condom, so much as a FitBit for your wiener. It is a ring that slides over your condom and tracks your thrust velocity, calories, burned, the amount of times you had sex, your girth, and can even detect chlamydia and syphilis — perhaps the only two useful things it does. This does not, I repeat does not, act as an actual birth control measure. It's just gamifies your sex life.

Amazing. pic.twitter.com/xBmUU6z223
— k. (@OhKayByeeee) March 2, 2017

People are on the fence about this thing, but they definitely like making fun of it.

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Posted by schimkom

1
Beats playing Frogger again.

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2
Nailed it.
3
oCum on.

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4
The marketing is on point.

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We all did great work.
6
This is sure to come. Sorry.

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That's what the leaderboard is for.
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One eye of the tiger.

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Hit 10,000!

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10
True.

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This is the end.