The World Outdoes Itself and Releases the World's First "Smart Condom," a FitBit for Your Penis

Well, it's come to this a the world's first Smart Condom.

Now before you go slapping thing on your little dickie, you should know that this isn't really a condom, so much as a FitBit for your wiener. It is a ring that slides over your condom and tracks your thrust velocity, calories, burned, the amount of times you had sex, your girth, and can even detect chlamydia and syphilis — perhaps the only two useful things it does. This does not, I repeat does not, act as an actual birth control measure. It's just gamifies your sex life. 

People are on the fence about this thing, but they definitely like making fun of it.

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  • 01

    Beats playing Frogger again.

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  • 02

    Nailed it.

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  • 03

    oCum on.

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  • 04

    The marketing is on point.

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  • 05

    We all did great work.

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  • 06

    This is sure to come. Sorry.

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  • 07

    That's what the leaderboard is for.

  • 08

    One eye of the tiger.

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  • 09

    Hit 10,000!

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  • 10

    True.

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  • 11

    This is the end.

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