Bride Disinvites Grandma To Wedding After She Gifts Her Vintage Wedding Dress To Her Son's Mistress

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abbyadler
May 8, 2022 7:00 PM EDT

Receiving a wedding dress from those who have walked down the aisle before you not only saves money, but also feels really special. It shows that the woman cares enough about you to pass down an item of clothing that obviously means a lot to them. Plus, if it's a dress from at least twenty years ago, it's so cool and vintage. We'd be absolutely thrilled if someone promised to pass on their wedding dress to us. In today's 'Am I the A$$hole?' post, OP told us about how her grandma mentioned that she would pass on her wedding dress to her when she was a kid. Now that she's getting married, she just discovered that her grandma is gifting the wedding dress to her son's mistress, who she claims she has a deeper bond with. Obviously, OP didn't take this well as someone who felt she was promised the dress back in her childhood. Plus, there's a whole lot of other family drama behind the scenes that calls for a lot of therapy. Scroll down for all the dramatic details. 

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  • 01
    Font - Y r/AmItheAsshole · Posted by u/Excellent-Ad-1055 9 hours ago A O 2 2 2 3 2 e AITA for uninviting my grandmother from my wedding after she gave her vintage dress to my dad's affair partner?
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055

    This one is a whole hot mess. 

  • 02
    Font - My grandma has a gorgeous vintage wedding dress. It couture, really cool without looking dated, and she is ok with it being altered or modernized.
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055

    This dress sounds lovely! We wish OP posted a picture too so we could check it out. 

  • 03
    Font - She mentioned a few times in passing when I was a kid that as the oldest girl I had dibs on it. We aren't super close because she was the MIL from hell to my mom, but she is big on passing stuff down, so I just assumed it would always be there.
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 04
    Font - We had a family friend "Ella" It is kind of complicated, but my grandma had some type of romantic relationship (think long term paid mistress) with Ella's dad and was a big part of Ella's growing up. Ella and my dad hated each other. My grandma always loved her like a daughter and she was always around though long past the relationship with her dad ending.
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 05
    Font - Ella and my dad had an inappropriate relationship my entire life. They used to hate each other and they were so immature about it, then when I got older I could see the way they fought was kind of changing and there was some tension. Then they became friends. Eventually they
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 06
    Font - were both cheating on their spouses. It got to the point that he was pretty much living with her at another house and just showing up occasionally to keep up appearances. I think his biggest hesitation was that me and my siblings hated Ella.
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 07
    Font - Two years ago, he told my mom he couldn't live a lie anymore and he was in love with Ella and thought he might have been their whole marriage. He admitted he only married my mom due to societal pressure and because she would be a good mom. He actually broke down crying. My mom had always kind of known, but obviously fell apart.
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 08
    Font - I'm trying to come around because I've never seen my dad this happy but I still can't stand her. Currently we are both planning weddings and I found out my grandma gave the dress to Ella. I asked how she could chose her over family and she told me Ella is literally on the level of a child to her and if she had to chose she would chose her. I said fine don't come.
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 09
    Font - My dad is now mad and says I'm being childish. He is saying that I'm too young to understand but everyone is going to gossip, so I need to re-invite my grandmother. He is willing to pay for my dress but says that I should get that ella and my grandma have a special bond
    via u/Excellent-Ad-1055
  • 10
    Font - Extension-Curve-353 · 9 hr. ago NTA. Your father and grandmother seem very alike and they are both dreadful people. Your grandmother broke a promise to you, and your father saying that she and Excruiciating Ella have a "special bond" shows his selfishness - he's aware that you hate Ella but still expects you to sacrifice to her, because it's all| about what he wants. Personally, I'd never see any of them again, but of course that's up to you.
    via u/Extension-Curve-353
  • 11
    Font - patjames904 · 9 hr. ago 2 S Commander in Cheeks [234] NTA. NOW your dad is afraid of gossip? NOT...YOUR...PROBLEM!!! Your grandmother told you her choice, Ella over you. This is YOUR wedding. You should only have people there who love and support you. Your grandmother doesn't.
    via u/patjames904
  • 12
    Font - warrinerdot · 9 hr. ago Certified Proctologist [20]] NTA. I was waffling a bit until your grandma stated she chose Ella, and then your father told you that you're too young to understand. You're getting married! You are definitely old enough to understand, you just don't accept their messed up relationships. And that's okay.
    via u/warrinerdot
  • 13
    Font - AnEmuOnAcid · 8 hr. ago Your dad is marrying his long term mistress - his moms foster daughter - after they both screwed over their former spouses, but you will be the cause of gossip? You get to decide who you want at your wedding, NTA.
    via u/AnEmuOnAcid
  • 14
    Font - throwaway-983527 · 9 hr. ago so your father only want once again to keep up apparence? please do no talk to him, his mistress and your grandma and enjoy your wedding with your family
    via u/throwaway-983527

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