‘This is your job!’: Man-Child Husband Demands Wife To Stop Working On Her Project And Start Making Him A Sandwich Because He Himself Is Incapable

Author image for elina lee
elina lee
Jan 14, 2023 3:00 PM EST

It's that time of the day, y'all. Time to call out some men on their bullsh*t again. Listen, we know that we, women, have a tendency to complain about men, but can you blame us? And let's not pretend like it doesn't go both ways. 

All we're saying is that we live in a modern world with modern norms, values, and traditions. So maybe it's time to stop with the stereotypes that cooking, cleaning, and keeping everything intact is solely the woman's responsibility? After all, it's not the 1300s anymore and we too, have to work for a living. 

Welp, today we're bringing you yet another man-child story about a lazy and incredibly entitled husband that thinks his wife is there to serve him and only him. Nothing she has going on in her life could ever be more important than him. Especially, when he wants a sandwich. Have a read, grab some popcorn, and if you're a man reading - take some notes of what NOT to do in a marriage. You know, if you actually want it to work out. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    Font - Posted by u/Such_Conversation_57 6 days ago AITA for saying that no one was getting any food until I finished my work?
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 02
    Smile - I (29F) live with my husband Tom (32M). He has a child Anna (5F) that he sees on weekends. I love Tom a lot, but honestly he can be a little exhausting sometimes. Anna is always sweet.
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 03
    Font - A little background context: in my family, my mother always did much of the work. She had a high paying job just like my dad did (both of them software engineers) but my dad was often on the couch playing video games while she worked on her laptop and cooked and cleaned all at the same time. I hated the dynamic and brought it up with my mom often but she had always just defended my dad saying that he did a lot of work. I promised myself that I was never going to grow up and marry someone
    via u/Such_Conversation_57

    "She had a high paying job just like my dad did (both of them software engineers) but my dad was often on the couch playing video games while she worked on her laptop and cooked and cleaned all at the same time." 

    This sounds a little too familiar tbh

  • 04
    Font - Now, years later....I'm kind of in that position. It's true that Tom does bring in a lot of money, but so do I. The first year or so was good. Sometimes he forgot things and had to be reminded, but overall he did what he was supposed to. After that, he just started slacking until I was doing the majority of the household chores and work. Every time I brought it up and tried to get him to change, he at first promised he would and then go back to his normal routine a few days later, and the
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 05
    Font - Over the weekend, Tom brought Anna over. I was working on a big project on my laptop, and had been since early morning. He went out with Anna for breakfast, and then came back around noon asking what was for lunch. I told him I would sandwiches or something later because I was busy. He kind of looked at me weirdly, and then went and sat on the couch and played video games while Anna napped.
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 06
    Font - Every once in a while he would look over at me, and then go back to playing video games. Later he finally puts down the controller and came up to me and asked why the sandwiches weren't ready yet. I told him that he knew I had a big project I was working on and would do it later. He tried to take the computer away from me coaxingly and saying that Anna would be hungry and that the project could wait.
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 07
    Font - At that point I kind of snapped. I was stressed from the project and I hadn't eaten all day (my fault) and I sort of yelled. I told him that he had arms and legs and a working brain so he could make lunch too, and that he does this all the time, and that he needs to start pulling his weight. He got startled but then yelled back that cooking was my job (I usually do the cooking and usually it isn't a problem because I like cooking). I told him fine.
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 08
    Font - I said I was sorry for trying to push my duties onto him. I had been about to make the sandwiches after a small portion of the work was done, to relax with a bit of cooking before returning to the project, but I then told him that I absolutely would make the sandwiches - but only when all my work was done. He started whining, but I told him either he finds some other form of food for him and Anna, or they wait. AITA?
    via u/Such_Conversation_57
  • 09
    Font - Caspian4136. 6 days ago Pooperintendant [52] ΝΤΑ Your husband has conditioned you into doing all the work around the house and you've let it slide, you even admitted you stopped asking because it never got anywhere. Now you've got a 32 year old son on top of a 5 year old step daughter. He is so lazy, immature and you shouldn't put up with this any more.
    via u/Caspian4136
  • 10
    Font - Misommar1246 6 days ago I don't get why he doesn't order out. If I was hungry and I couldn't cook, that would be a no brainer. Maybe I'm crazy but it almost sounds like a power play to force the busy wife to cook while he is supposedly making good money and could just easily pick up the phone.
    via u/Misommar1246
  • 11
    Font - MayhemWins25 - 6 days ago Cause it's not actually about the sandwich, this is about making sure OP knows her place and what her priorities should be. There's a term for this called weaponised incompetence. He's choosing to not do something he's fully capable of so she will internalise that it's expected of her and just make the sandwiches without him needing to ask. What's particularly sad is in this specific instance he is weaponising his daughter in order to make OP feel bad that she ha
    via u/MayhemWins25
  • 12
    Font - It doesn't have to be intentional or with malice in mind, but as he said it's "her job." This wasn't because he knows OP enjoying cooking and assumed that this would be a nice break or something she would like to do, it's that in his mind she is OBLIGATED to cook for him whether she wants to or Really he's doing this with every chore. He's not going to stop till he has to live with the consequences ie OP has to stop doing chores for him. It sucks cause it's basically a war of attrition wi
    via u/MayhemWins25
  • 13
    Font - TassieBorn 6 days ago What disturbs me is that she has internalised the idea that it's "her job". He doesn't see a problem, because her current solution benefits him. To benefit from therapy, he would need to acknowledge that there is a problem. I'm not sure that there's a genuine solution short of separation. I told him fine. I said I was sorry for trying to push my duties onto him.
    via u/TassieBorn
  • 14
    Font - Good QueenFluffenChop 6 days ago He already got food from a restaurant for breakfast for just him and his daughter. He could have easily made that day a treat day and eaten out again either by going out or ordering delivery.
    via u/GoodQueenFluffenChop
  • 15
    Human body - Ms_PlapPlap 6 days ago And he could've very easily brought a muffin and some coffee home for his wife, who is working!
    via u/Ms_PlapPlap
  • 16
    Font - RU_screw 6 days ago My parents were the opposite. I so very vividly remember the ONE time my dad tried to pull that shit on my mom. She had cooked all day and had to run out to get something (to be fair, dad was fixing something in the bathroom so he didnt go out) and he was waiting at the table for her to make his plate. She made herself her own plate, sat down, started to eat and asked him is he broke his arms and legs and was incapable to getting food. As kids do, we laughed. He was so
    via u/RU_screw
  • 17
    Font - IanDOsmond. 6 days ago Partassipant [3] Wait - BOTH your parents were being useful human beings, and when one of them called the other one on the fact that they could do better, that parent responded by doing better? Like competent grownups would? Man, that's messed up.
    via u/IanDOsmond

Tags

marriage wife relationships husband sandwich entitled stereotypes incapable obnoxious
Scroll Down For The Next Article