'I fired Kevin after one day of amazing stupidity': Manager tells jaw-dropping Kevin story with a horrifying ending

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
May 22, 2023 12:00 AM EDT

Prepare to witness to one cafe manager's incredible story of the worst employee ever, a man incapable of working safely and efficiently for even an hour. As the OP told to r/StoriesAboutKevin, they had just hired a 26-year-old man to work at this small cafe. 

Things already weren't off to the best start – Kevin showed up 90 minutes late to his very first day of work! Somehow, this manager let his brand new employee work his first shift. Slowly but surely, Kevin managed to screw up literally every task handed to him. There are lots of stories on Reddit that are surprising or startling, but let me tell you, this one actually made my jaw drop at the conclusion of Kev's first day. It's hard to imagine a worse mistake than what Kevin did/almost did to his customers!

Luckily, this manager made the decision to fire him immediately, most likely for the safety of every person in a 20 foot radius of Kevin. You just have to read the stunning story below. Then, in the comments, people wrote to the OP asking questions, and the manager did answer. What in the world is wrong with Kevin? Well, the commenters had some ideas…

Up next, these kind folks shared the secrets of home ownership that you'll never find out until you own a house for yourself. 

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  • 01
    Motor vehicle - 'Do you think I should go to the hospital?' 'You're fired.'
    via Kris Atomic on Unsplash
  • 02
    Font - r/r/Stories AboutKevin. Posted by u/LazerMoon Centaur 3 years ago (S) I Fired Kevin After One Day Of Amazing Stupidity
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 03
    Font - Originally posted on r/AskReddit and someone suggested I post it here. Probably one of the stupidest people I've ever met. He was a 26 yr old male and turned up an hour and a half late the first day. He was brought in by his mum, which I thought was kinda odd for a grown man. I let that slide but then things just got worse. It was a small roadside cafe/eatery, so I thought I'd get him started on small duties to ease him into the way of the place. I asked him to put new toilet paper in the
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 04
    Font - "Right, furthermore, and probably more perplexing - can you not see that this massive roll couldn't possibly fit on this small bar?" "Yeah, I thought that was odd." Oh boy, well, the day goes on and after the kitchen is pretty much closed except for pre- cooked baked goods, I get him to give a general clean and ask to make sure he wipes down all the benches. I leave him to it as I assume he's doing fine. Corr-ONG! One of the other staff comes and says we've run out of toilet paper, and I'
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 05
    Font - "WHO taught you to wipe down benches with toilet paper? Have you ever seen anyone wipe down benches with toilet paper?" "The cloth was dirty and I didn't want to clean it out" By this stage I'm thinking, day's nearly over, just let it go and I'm sure it will work out fine...yeah, you know what's coming...Kevin strikes again, and this time, it's beyond moronic. So I've got him on serving customers pastries and the like because all you have to do is take it out of the glass bay, put it on a
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 06
    Font - "It's probably just the seeds in the jam" Now there's something about the way he says this that makes my alarm bells ring "Show me what you put on these scones" and I start marching toward the prep bench - sitting on the bench is the bowl of whipped cream, and next to it, in a plastic bag, is a broken glass jar which contains the jam - the m is feeding the customer broken glass. "I didn't think it would be a big deal" "Are you F insane?!" I grab the plate of mostly uneaten glass-infused s
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 07
    Font - Totalweirdo42 Wow. People like this need to be studied. Or at least have a camera crew follow them so we can all see the highlight reel. 785 Reply Share dobber1965 So the real life Truman show. Just with an idiot.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 08
    Font - ecp001 His mother would likely blame OP for insufficient training - not eating glass was not covered in the training.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 09
    Mammal - _AlreadyTaken_ It is like he has crossed circuits in his brain. "Don't do this" has become "Do this"
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 10
    Font - [deleted] This falls under the category of how the f did he make it out of his front door!?!
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 11
    Font - cbolser How'd he make it out his front door?? He didn't. His mommy held his hand and helped him out...and into the car...and into the building for his new job. HaHaHa. This Kevin will not survive in the wild...even for a day 14 Reply Share uyigho98 I honestly wouldn't expect him to survive an hour out in the wild. He'd probably eat poison ivy or try to pet a mountain lion only to get mauled by it.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 12
    Human body - coconut-greek-yogurt Considering how late he was, he may have taken that long just to figure it out
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 13
    Font - QueenElsaArrendelle why didn't he use the paper towel to wipe the benches? 195 Reply Share LazerMoonCentaur OP. That question is precisely why he was fired.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 14
    Font - inannaofthedarkness Why was the jam jar broken and in a plastic bag? 99 Reply Share LazerMoonCentaur OP ... He dropped it on the floor, scooped it into a bag and decided to use it anyway. It was full of shattered glass.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 15
    Font - PopsGalaxy Was the customer refunded?! Jesus how do you even tell someone that- "hey the dips I just fired straight up feed you glass-whoopsie" I'm a cook and I'm livid at this situation I'm two hemispheres away from out of principle.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 16
    Font - LazerMoonCentaur OP He was sent to us through an employment agency and had apparently been vetted by their staff. He was interviewed but I wasn't there for it. I suspect he is one of those people who present well physically i.e young, good looking, smiles a lot, nods head. It was a basic job after all; wiping down tables, taking orders, serving food, cleaning etc. low- skilled work - what is there really to look out for? You don't expect someone to not understand even the basics that you
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 17
    Font - They were hoping he'd get work so he would finally move out of home and literally told me that if I didn't hire him back they would kick him out of the house and he'd be homeless and that would be My fault. Needless to say I just shook my head and said something along the lines of "well that explains it". I think it was just an extreme lack of discipline and parenting and molly coddling and them telling him he's there little genius or something while never teaching him the basics of how t
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 18
    Font - LazerMoonCentaur OP. So this is in Australia. In Australia, in order to receive unemployment benefits you are referred to a Job Search Provider. That provider has no choice but to keep you and you usually have to attend an appointment every fortnight in order to keep receiving Centrelink benefits - you can remained unemployed for years, even decades and keep receiving benefits.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 19
    Font - QueenElsaArrendelle I don't remember ever being shown how to change a toilet paper roll. I think most people are able to figure it out when the need arises. 4.1 7 Reply Share PrismInTheDark Probably you're shown how when you're potty- trained at -2 years old and then forget about being shown because you were 2, but you don't forget how to do it because, y'know it's a toilet paper roll.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 20
    Font - _AlreadyTaken_ His behavior was so ridiculous I'd even suspect him of deliberately trying to get fired. Eating broken glass though seems like a long way to go just to get out of it. If he is just a momma's boy then he is in for a tough time when his parent(s) pass away.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 21
    Font - Conchobar8 Hospitality often has very lax interviews. As long as you can spell your name and don't say out loud that you plan to steal, you'll get a trial shift. 28 steven8765. Reply Share lol steal? that's what they're worried about? I'd be more worried about kevin cooking a steak after marinating it in shrapnel, broken glass and the shreds of his common sense. not to mention potential food poisoning.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 22
    Font - Comment deleted by user. LazerMoonCentaur OP. Yes, for a job like this it isn't even so much of an interview as "Look, you're here, you were sent to us by Such and Such so we assume you have some clue, we need someone right away, these are the things we require, cool?" There is very high turnover in retail and hospitality in general.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 23
    Font - [deleted] He didn't want the job, that's clear. Reply Share 17 LazerMoonCentaur OP. There's actually a lot more that went on that day which I've excluded for the sake of brevity and humour, but he is actually a very disturbed individual and I suspect after learning more that he is probably in need of psychiatric help.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 24
    Font - GJacks75 Alternate theory: Kevin wanted to be fired. He only took the job because Mum was sick of his st. Oh, and it's bain-marie, not bay marine. 17 Reply Share _AlreadyTaken_ I thought that too but eating broken glass seems like an unnecessary step to take to get fired when there are a lot of other less internal bleedy things you could do instead.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 25
    Human body - luna-the-lunatic I'm mostly disturbed by the idea that you served scones with whipped cream
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin
  • 26
    Font - tutoredzeus The first good story I've read here in a while. The last exchange is like something out of a sitcom.
    via r/StoriesAboutKevin

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