Gold Digger Wife Abandons Husband Right After He Gets Fired, Wastes No Time & Gets Engaged to Rich Surgeon Despite Divorce Not Being Finalized Yet

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elina lee
Mar 14, 2023 12:00 PM EDT

Let's be real, divorce is (almost) never pretty. In fact, it's usually pretty fricken nasty - especially, if kids are involved. But no matter how badly each of you screwed up in the marriage, there are a few general rules that should be followed throughout the divorce in order to keep things as civil as possible. Like, for example, DO be respectful, DON'T be petty. DO try to make the kids as comfy as possible and DON'T get engaged before the papers are finalized. 

Yeah, we didn't think that this should be written either but apparently, it's not common knowledge. Getting engaged while going through a divorce is like trying to put out fire with gasoline - you're just going to make things worse. This brings us to today's story about a nasty divorce after ten years of marriage, a gold digger ex-wife, some layoffs, and a whole lotta drama. 

We won't spoil any of the other details for you but all we will say is... yikes... big yikes. 

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  • 01
    Font - Posted by u/amanfilled with regret 3 days ago My family warned me I was dating a gold digger and I ignored them. 10 years later...I see they were right
    via u/amanfilled
  • 02
    Font - I (now 35M) met my wife, Annabelle (now 34F), when we were in college. My family was lower middle class and I was hustling to make sure student loans didn't kill me post-graduation. At first, everything seemed great. She was truly my rock through some really hard times. I struggle with anxiety and depression, as well as imposter syndrome. She had her own struggles too. I thought we fit well.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 03
    Font - My parents and sister always told me that while she seemed nice enough, something was off. This only increased when Annabelle dropped out of college and shared her plans to become a housewife/SAHM one day, so "she didn't need a degree". Back then, there was no guarantee that I would have a high paying job but I also didn't mind her staying home with our future kids.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 04
    Font - Then, I got an offer for my dream job. Six figures, company car, travel, the works. They'd also pay for me to obtain my master's, something that seemed out of reach considering I was drowning in student loan debt. I could finally move out of my parents' house and get one of my own. I used part of my signing bonus to buy an engagement ring for Annabelle.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 05
    Font - Because I began dating her prior to the money, I never imagined that she was with me for anything else. She loved me when I was a broke college student, we had planned our futures back then. How was it different.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 06
    Font - My family tried to point out the red flags. Annabelle planned an over the top, expensive wedding. She wanted the biggest house she could find. My signing bonus was drained rather quickly and I was worried about not saving enough. I constantly told her to slow down, we don't need the best of everything. And she would, for awhile. Then it'd pick up again.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 07
    Font - We had two children together, who are now 8 and 4. The big spending got worse when they came along. But again, I was okay with it. I was making good money, we could afford it. Annabelle grew up in a similar situation as me, so I figured she just wanted to spoil the kids.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 08
    Font - Then, I got laid off from my job. It wasn't out of nowhere. The field I'm in has slowly begun to dwindle over the years. I stayed on as long as I could but at this point, the company is going under. Annabelle was worried when I relayed the news, but I informed her that we had our savings, we'd be okay until I found work again.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 09
    Font - I was hired at a new company in a similar but different filed within a month. The catch? I am making significantly less. It's enough to live off of. We can stay in our house. But, things need to change. I pointed out our kids can't go to private school anymore. We can't take multiple lavish trips a year. No more frivilous spending. She wasn't happy, but again, I gave her grace. It's a big adjustment, even for me.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 10
    Font - Just 2 months after I started at my new job, Annabelle came to me and said "I don't think I can do this anymore". I was taken off guard and we had several discussions, that amounted in her taking the kids to be with her mother while we took "a break". I already knew our marriage was over, no one can come back from a break unscathed.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 11
    Font - Sure enough, a few weeks after she moved out, she told me she wanted a divorce. She claimed we had grown apart. Said I worked too many hours at my last job and I was never around. While it's true, I did work a lot, I was home every night for dinner. We had all of the weekend together. I traveled often, but she always came with me up until our oldest started elementary school. She never complained about a damn thing. In fact, I once said I was tired from working a long week and I felt guil
    via u/amanfilled
  • 12
    Font - I asked her several times if it was about me losing money. She denied it up and down. She "married me so young and needed to see what was out there". She put it all on me.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 13
    Font - Naively, I told myself that this was what happened when you marry your college sweetheart. You grow apart. I didn't want to believe that my entire marriage had been a lie.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 14
    Font - Within 2 weeks of filing for divorce, she was with someone new. The reality came crashing down. She tried to play it off as they just so happened to meet, but they moved fast. She was moving in with him within 3 months. They were engaged before our divorce was even final. This guy is a surgeon. He makes 6 figures a year.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 15
    Font - I don't know if the cheating began when I got laid off or before. I suppose it doesn't matter. We're divorced now. Due to my schedule, I only see my kids every weekend and I hate it. I regret not making Annabelle sign a prenup as she got half of everything.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 16
    Font - My family is aware that she's moved on and I know they have their suspicions but we've never spoken about it. In the 3 years since the divorce, they have never uttered "I told you so", even though I deserve it.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 17
    Font - I went from loving Annabelle to despising her. I love my children very much, but I hate that I wasted 10 years on a woman who only wanted me for my money. I should have so much more saved, but she either squandered it on useless junk when we were married or took half in the divorce. God, I hate her.
    via u/amanfilled
  • 18
    Font - Blunt_Face 3 days ago . Sorry to hear this man you really got screwed. I never believed in looking at tiny signs or red flags when looking at a long-term partner. But after having a similar situation myself. There's actually a lot of things you can do with dating to see how somebody really feels on the inside
    via u/Blunt_Face
  • 19
    Font - Ruarc20. 3 days ago Bojack Horseman had the perfect quote for this. "When you're wearing rose tinted glasses, the red flags just look like flags"
    via u/Ruarc20
  • 20
    Font - Low-Natural-3403 3 days ago ● Back then, there was no guarantee that I would have a high paying job but I also didn't mind her staying home with our future kids.------------She's not a golddigger, you say it yourself.
    via u/Low-Natural-3403
  • 21
    Font - You have been divorced for 3 years. Seriously, you need to talk to a professional abt your feelings. You have been ruminating for 3 yrs.
    via u/Low-Natural-3403
  • 22
    Font - Glad-Invite9081 · 3 days ago "Gold prospector" is great. She dug having the gold and when it ran out, so did she. I dunno if she really was prospecting, but the timing of her "I can't do this anymore" and moving on so quickly to greener pastures makes it pretty obvious that the lifestyle was a big part of her happiness in the marriage. So six of one, half dozen of the other.
    via u/Glad-Invite9081
  • 23
    Font - Vargoroth 3 days ago ● I treat every financial red flag as a major one. If you don't get along financially I just don't see the relationship working out.
    via u/Vargoroth
  • 24
    Font - Fantastic-Top610. 3 days ago Even with a prenup she would have been entitled to half of your marital assets and money, she was a SAHM for a decade and supported you (as you said). It simply sounds like you grew apart (as she said).
    via u/Fantastic-Top610
  • 25
    Font - Merunit Yes, I'm curious how OP envisions a "fair" situation? SAHM for 10 years doesn't get anything in the divorce? This would prove to him she wasn't a gold digger? ● 3 days ago
    via u/Merunit

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