Weekly Internet Roundup: Andrew Tate Struggles, Teens Hate Intercourse, and Tradwives Aren't Good at Wifing

Hello again, and welcome to another edition of the article that summarizes some of the loudest online events in recent days. This week the internet seems to be abuzz with topics relating to gender, sexuality, and absolutely not going insane in a jail cell. Strap in, it's going to be a bumpy ride.

A Fantastic Week to Be Andrew Tate (If You Hate Ghosts)

After all the awful things that Andrew Tate has both allegedly and most definitely done, it was satisfying to see the him get a hilarious public comeuppance at the end of last year. It's fair to say that the whole being locked up thing has not really agreed with Tate, who has begun patchily growing out his hair, potentially suffering from steroid withdrawal, and committing himself to posting insane things to Twitter.

First, the disgraced influencer caused a stir by claiming to have fought a ghost in his prison cell, naturally winning the battle. Following that, he mused on how most people have not “genuinely tried to fly" because they don't push themselves hard enough. Both of these in the space of 48 hours, and a rumor that he's suffering from advanced stage lung cancer? This has been a downward spiral for the history books. 

2013 Tumblr Called, It Wants Its Insane Discourse Back

If the last decade of kids growing up on the internet has proven anything, it's that overly online teenagers will almost always have a Tumblr phase. When it's not literal, it's spiritual: i.e. cherry picking some of the wildest behavior from there and spreading its crazy ways elsewhere. 

Twitter has been the lucky platform to deal with the brunt of this recently, in the form of a truly mind-boggling discourse cycle. The topic is whether it's acceptable for parents to have sex when their kids are under the same roof as them. Spoiler alert: a lot of people think it isn't.

The whole argument stemmed from an ethically dubious video where a mother records her daughter bring upset after she overheard her screaming in her bedroom. What started out as a point that it's not a great idea to be overly loud when your children are in the next room quickly snowballed into this all-timer of a crazy take, that included helpful suggestions of arranging a babysitter and a hotel room every time you feel the urge to do the dirty. No one can deny that proof of parental sexual activity can be mortifying, but knowing that your family went bankrupt due to their horniness is even more so.

Twitter Is, Like, Incapable of Listening Comprehension

Looking for love! It is often disappointing, and the whole world seems to be obsessed with it! It's hard to keep track of all the SEO-friendly buzzwords that define the dating scene these days, but the so-called ‘talking stage’ is a pretty common one. Common enough, in fact, that anyone who has been on a dating app in the past decade probably has an inkling of what it is, and why some people don't like it.

However, you wouldn't think this to see the reaction to one woman's explanation of it on podcast Dating Talk. Voicing her frustrations about not getting into a relationship after texting potential partners at length, people were more focused on her overzealous use of ‘like’ as a filler word. I'm sure any of us would be much more poised if we were being quizzed by an annoying dude who thinks that being a podcaster is a legitimate career choice.

STOP TRYING TO BE TRADWIVES !!! WE NEED ELECTRICIANS !!!

Being a homemaker isn't for everyone, including a lot of women. There's a reason that all those midcentury suburban housewives spent most of their time coasting on benzodiazepines, but this point seems to be lost on those hellbent on promoting the tradwife lifestyle. 

Any sensible person will say that there's nothing wrong with dedicating your life to work around the home, provided it's what you want and that you're able. There's at least one woman out there who doesn't seem to think this is the case, though, and she has captured viral attention with a video in which she complains about being condemned by society for ‘living her truth’ and wearing double florals to cook mediocre bread. Career girls can do that too, y'know.

That brings another week of the roundup to a close. I can't lie, it's been an exhausting edition. One day, we'll all stop posting our every idiotic thought to social media, but we show no signs of stopping yet. I've got no choice except to welcome you back next time.